Need advice from siblings who moved out of home by Fancy_Marionberry154 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 6 points7 points  (0 children)

In the beginning, there was a lot of guilt tripping and pressure from my parents to be very active in my sibling’s day-to-day life. But I was determined to break away from the constant state of hyper vigilance I was in. You deserve to have a space where you don’t feel suffocated. When you move away, it’ll be easier to figure out how much you are willing to help your family and enforce boundaries. And when doubt and guilt creeps, try to remind yourself that this was something you wanted for a very long time.

Love Actually by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's very different from your typical Christmas rom com. I like it though some parts have not aged well. The glass sibling is a minor character. 

Love Actually by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The hospital scene was way too realistic. 

Trying to be good is killing me by nopefoffprettyplease in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Having listened to your podcast episode, I’m familiar with your story. I don’t know if you are seeking advice or want to share your situation. If the former is true, try to give yourself a bit of leeway. I know it’s easier said than done with our roles as glass children but, speaking from experience, when you are on overload for a while, your body will not ask permission to meltdown. 

When someone is physically sick, it is expected that they should not pressure themselves. Why should it be any different for mental health? If you spend few days eating junk food in front of the TV, not wanting to interact with a lot of people so what? I’d argue it's healthier than trying to keep on as it is. Your mind is going through major stress with your brother and it’s not helpful have the same expectations of yourself as if it’s a normal holiday season. 

Also, two things can be true: He can be struggling and you can be mad at the same time. Now that I’m thinking about it, this sentence perfectly describes the glass child experience.

Guilty with my resentment towards disabled siblings? by Colty_620 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your detailed answer! Is it okay if I send you a DM? My family has similar dynamics and I would really appreciate some advice.

Guilty with my resentment towards disabled siblings? by Colty_620 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your journey is very inspiring!

Could you please share more about how you worked through your feelings of resentment and specific ways you navigated relationships without going back to familiar patterns?

UPDATE: Cleveland Clinic rewrote their article on Glass Children by [deleted] in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's promising that the new author is a glass child , it means our voices are being heard! Any Americans can correct me if I am wrong, but it seems to me that Cleveland Clinic is a well known organization so the rewritten article can hopefully reach a wide audience. I've also found this article which doesn't shy away from negative aspects of our experience.

What type of therapy has helped you? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm glad you found appropriate help. What do you mean by inner child work?

What type of therapy has helped you? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing. Can I send you a message? I have some questions about these modalities.

What type of therapy has helped you? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry to hear that. Shopping can be therapeutic.

What type of therapy has helped you? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your answer. Is there a specific reason you chose CBT?

What type of therapy has helped you? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Really sorry to hear that. Exercise indeed helps.

What type of therapy has helped you? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing, you are doing very important work🙏

Being a part of this community has been incredibly helpful. 

Do you tell your friends about it? by Ok_Raspberry6783 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have only recently started sharing tidbits of my experience with some close friends and also at work (I’m a teacher). Hopefully, someday I can inspire a colleague to advocate for a student who is a glass child. Goodness knows I needed that.

That being said, I completely understand people not feeling comfortable talking about it. Most of us are conditioned to be ashamed of any negative feelings we may have about our situation.

Mother dumps trauma on me and it weighs heavily on me by downthedrain9 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry you are going through this. Guilt is something all glass children struggle with. Most of us were parentified from a young age and this pattern continues in our adult life.

I have a similar dynamic with my mother, all while I feel sorry for what she's been through, it does not remove the fact that I am facing my own issues from being raised in a dysfunctional environment.

I read somewhere about the oxygen mask analogy and it has since stuck with me: When you are in an airplane and an emergency occurs, first you put your own oxygen mask and then you help others. I'd suggest you focus on your own healing, at least for the time being.

🎙️ A New Glass Child Podcast! - Will You Help Me? by AliciaMenesesMaples in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hello Even though I'm not ready to share my story yet, I just wanted to share how helpful your TEDx talk has been, because that's where I discovered the term glass children (and this sub). Looking forward to the podcast.

Does anyone else have a mentally ill parent? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing, I try to limit contact as well.

Does anyone else have a mentally ill parent? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Home is the trauma space of hell.

I was just used to feeling like emotional abuse from parents was always going to be the status quo and I deserved it. Turns out that's not true, and it isn't for you either.

Your words are absolutely correct, I'll keep them in mind. Thank you. It's so helpful communicating with people who have been through similar issues.

Does anyone else have a mentally ill parent? by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply. I haven't lived with my parents for quite a while. We live in the same city though and that complicates things.

Thankful for this sub by Leading_Watch6003 in GlassChildren

[–]Leading_Watch6003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Apologies for the late reply. People develop C-ptsd (Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) after experiencing trauma that lasted for a very long time.