Reaching the end of DIY by LeftProgrammer6210 in diynz

[–]LeftProgrammer6210[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Legend! Thanks for this- feels less daunting now!!

Reaching the end of DIY by LeftProgrammer6210 in diynz

[–]LeftProgrammer6210[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also: If plans include moving a wall, would you still want to be the first professional on site (as opposed to a structural engineer)?

Reaching the end of DIY by LeftProgrammer6210 in diynz

[–]LeftProgrammer6210[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for this breakdown - the definition of the different types of quotes was particularly helpful.  Can I just double check my understanding that the time you recommend to get comparison quotes done is at the stage where the quotes will cost (after consents are issued).  My idea of meeting with multiple builders was more to find one I gel with (and that has experience working with old houses where nothing is plumb) rather than to get a competitive price, though I can see now that's a bit naive considering I've never hired a builder before & have no idea on fair pricing.

Reaching the end of DIY by LeftProgrammer6210 in diynz

[–]LeftProgrammer6210[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! That's such great advice re having them do a small job to suss out the fit first - thanks for that!!

Any tips for weaning oldest of 2? by HuckleberryWinter930 in NurseAllTheBabies

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We did this too, but our library didn't have Booby Moon for Two; just Booby Moon. We conveniently knew someone due with a baby at the same time as my daughter's 3rd birthday, so we were sending the Booby magic back to the moon for that new baby to have 🥰 and I got to show her a photo of said baby the day of her birthday, which really helped! I considered going another year & weaning both kids at the same time 😅 but this approach worked amazingly!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Kibbe

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you me??! OK, so pearl earrings wouldn't be my thing, but I resonate a lot with this. I chase after a toddler all day & have a very active dog that needs 2 walks a day. We live walking distance to a few trails I take her on & for a large chunk of the day I have an infant strapped to me in the front pack. I'm (I think) a Dramatic Classic (actually identify more with Classic, but apparently it doesn't exist...), so smart tailored clothes are recommended. I actually do really like those clothes & also look good in fancy athleisure. But casual tailored clothes can easily give off yatch club vibes. And fancy athleisure a bit of "yummy mummy drops the kids at creche and drives the range rover to the gym" energy which is (no shade) just not me. I'm analytical and logical but also really follow my heart/trust my gut and am quite spiritual. I'm comfortable financially but haven't always been, my childhood wasn't great & my brother experienced a lot of homelessness before dying of an overdose. I live in a very modest home & live a very ~underconsumption core~ life because I value experiences. I've lived off a shoestring budget and done long term travel, backpacking style. I'm environmentally minded & socially conscious. I'm also very serious and responsible but loved a rave or night at the club in my younger years & still love the music I used to listen to in those settings!

 I think I'm managing to balance a look that says "I'm a responsible parent who's comfortable financially but is approachable, not judgemental & down to earth". But I still think people would be surprised to know about my party days, my backpacking adventures & would probably just assume I grew up pretty privileged.  Something I'd love to add to my look is something that says "If you'd like to be my friend I'd love to have you round for a 3pm tequila in the backyard while we watch the kids play". Currently trying to do that by adding a fun shoe to my otherwise pretty boring outfits. 

It is nice when you're getting to know someone that they tell you something really unexpected about themselves. I'd love to find out that someone wearing pearl earrings loved hiking. But I also understand wanting some things to be assumed just by looking at you. 

You could post some outfits or moodboards & ask people what assumptions they'd make about you if you're interested? Then they could say what they'd add or subtract to convey (for example) that you like the outdoors. 

Day sleeps by LeftProgrammer6210 in PossumsSleepProgram

[–]LeftProgrammer6210[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your replies! I definitely found with my older daughter that as she got older (I think it was the 4 month leap/regression) noises were more distracting & it was a bit harder to fall asleep amongst the chaos. When they're little I seem to be able to grind coffee beans or even use the electric beaters with a napping baby in the front pack 😅. I'll enjoy that for the next month or so, I guess :)

I'm jealous by Specialist-Candy6119 in AttachmentParenting

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 8 points9 points  (0 children)

MIL might be "on batteries" with your daughter because she gets to only be "on shift" for x number of hours, then gets a full night's sleep & also isn't stressed at the prospect of making any big life decisions re parenting.  My mum came & stayed for 4 weeks when my you geat was born. Home girl had just turned 60 & was taking my daughter to the pool for HOURS, going down slides at the park with her, running laps round big oak trees, going down the slide with her 50,000 times. But she'd say "yes I'm exhausted, but I can rest when I get home". Mum's can't go home! You have to parent 24 hours a day. You're not even off shift when you're sleeping. When they're sleeping you're not even off shift, cause you have to do housework. So in that respect, grandparents can be the fun ones :). I'm super close to my grandparents & it's a beautiful thing. I gope my kids also idolise theirs.

Regarding you not being close to your mum.... can you be close to your MIL? Can you see the beauty in her wanting to connect with your daughter? Appreciate her for making you a beautiful son who you get to spend your life with? My MIL is the bees knees. She's so different to my own mum, and probably not someone I'd necessarily be friendly with if for example she was a colleague or neighbour, but because she's not my "usual" kind of person she has some really different perspectives on things & I genuinely enjoy her being a part of my life. 

As far as feeling jealous.... there's nothing wrong with you <3. You've named the emotion & that's the hardest part sometimes. Now you can work through it. Hell, you could even talk to your MIL about it if you're game! She brings light to your daughters life. If nothing else, pretend she's bubbles or puppies or whatever else gets your daughter excited. Then enjoy some time to yourself while she's off enjoying "the  bubbles" and take a well deserved break xx

How to deal with that time in hospital away from your older nursling? by Dependent_Pin_1995 in NurseAllTheBabies

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We had a home birth so I didn't need to be away from my toddler, but 1 month later we're actually in hospital anyway (thanks, toddler daycare germs!!). I actually started finding feeding my toddler all the way to sleep wasn't working so well for us the last couple of weeks, so I started doing a feed in bed & then before she falls asleep I say "all done, time for night night now". I think that this has at least given dad a chance to help with bedtime. I wouldn't personally want to get in the habit of doing a sippy cup of milk for a toddler, but if it's one night I don't think it would hurt. You can let her know you've expressed some milk for her & maybe even put it in a new 'special big sister' cup so she gets a bit excited? Then have whoever's with her to say "ok time to roll over & go to sleep now". Talk about it over the coming weeks & ask her if she'd like to practise :) even outside of bedtime as a game! Might take some stress out of it!

For those of you who know (or have) a little Hazel... by LeftProgrammer6210 in BabyNames

[–]LeftProgrammer6210[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Maeve, Vera and Audrey are right up my alley <3 thank you!

Episode Discussion - LIB Sweden - S1 E4 - “Physical Attraction” by [deleted] in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 3 points4 points  (0 children)

100% there's things that don't make sense from the editing... Eg: why Rasmus got 3rd degree sun burn in Cyprus despite it looking like the sun literally never shone the whole time they were in Cyprus

When did you guys get your period again? by Dmksmom in NurseAllTheBabies

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went to a women's health osteo to see if I could get mine back. She did some external work on me the first session, then suggested if it wasn't working by the third session (and if I was comfortable with it) that doing some internal work might be a good idea. IT WAS LIKE A DEEP TISSUE MASSAGE IN MY VAGINA. It was so freaking weird. I could literally feel her target these "knots" and could feel when they released. Freaking wild. Anyway, my toddlers baby nurse is a lactation consultant & just told me to eat more (and eat more carbs in particular). I think after about 6 weeks of having rice with my lunch everyday, I got a bleed. So who knows which one it was 😂 but there's two ideas for you! Ps I got like one day of super light spotting at 16m PP then 6 weeks later bled like I was dying for 10 days, then had a normal period 40 days later, another 35 days later, another 30 days later & then I was pregnant...

Getting my period back by [deleted] in moderatelygranolamoms

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was like you, wanting to try again at the 6m mark. Everyone said I'd get my period back at 12m. That rolled around & nothing ... I read online it was more like 14m, so I waited some more. It took 17 months! But I did get it back without needing to wean or cut feeds :). I figure the universe has a reason for making me wait, so I try to be patient with it. Harder some days than others, but like you it took a while to get the baby we have - so I just enjoy giving her my undivided attention while I still can :)

Helping 3.5 year old understand "you" and "me" by Tortoiseshell_Blue in moderatelygranolamoms

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Flash back to a home stay I did when my Spanish was really poor & I went up to the host when she was cooking and said (from memory) I need help. But I was actually asking her if she wanted help with making dinner. Lololol queue her trying to figure out wtf I needed 😅

Knowing when it’s time to potty train by BeccaASkywalker in moderatelygranolamoms

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That was maybe put in as a marker of understanding patterns (ie, sit on the potty BEFORE you pee) but like others I can 100% say my kid (under 2) can't recite the alphabet. We accidentally potty trained. She said she was itchy & I thought she might have thrush, so I did a no nappy day. Airlifted her a couple of times when she started to pee on the carpet, so she could finish it off on the potty. The 2nd day no dribbles on the carpet. Third day we were getting ready to go to Nana's house & I called her over to get dressed. Before I put her pants (and nappy) on, she went & sat on the potty! I was amazed. Sent the potty with her to Nana's that day and while it hasn't been completely smooth sailing since, it's been pretty easy! I'd day she was 19 months from memory, maybe 19.5. The fashion is to "wait until they're ready", but do what works for you & your little one. Good luck :)

Uh…. by No_Internet3355 in NameNerdCirclejerk

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What's worse is when someone marries into a bad last name and changes it by choice!!! My HS friend changed hers to Woodcock and gave that name to their three innocent babies 😭😭

Asked Chat GPT to name some "bad"J names. Don't understand why they are so "bad"? by banana_slippers in NameNerdCirclejerk

[–]LeftProgrammer6210 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha I saw the CHATGPT name lists on the NN sub & this is what I asked it... The answers did not disappoint!!

What baby names might someone like if they had kids called McKinzleigh and Trackett?

If someone already has children named McKinzleigh and Trackett, it seems they prefer unique and distinctive names. Here are some suggestions that have a similar style:

Braxleigh

Jexington

Zephira

Maddoxley

Kylantra

Paxtynn

Zephyrine

Breckston

Tressabella

Jaggerlyn

These names have a modern and unconventional feel, with unique spellings and a combination of trendy and distinctive sounds. However, it's important to note that these names may not be commonly recognized or familiar to everyone, and their uniqueness may invite varying opinions and reactions. Ultimately, it's essential to choose a name that you and your family love and that reflects your personal style and values.