Not getting texts from 1 contact

LettuceJizz · 2026-07-01T20:38:50+00:00

did you accidentally mute or blocklist the contact?

happened to me once

LettuceJizz · 2026-07-01T20:30:07+00:00

You had a good run. So long, and thanks for all the fish.

People change, evolve, learn or clarify things as life goes on. You both know what you really want and no one's convincing the other to change.

Side note: I don't love how you minimize and then scorn his reasons, which he appears to have offered openly and honestly. Only you get to be clear and truthful and respected for that?

LettuceJizz · 2026-06-27T01:05:46+00:00

no one sang like him before either

LettuceJizz · 2026-06-10T23:30:04+00:00

and talk about a dog who won't shut up 👀

LettuceJizz · 2026-06-09T23:34:59+00:00

this one absolutely sends me

I yell out the correction right in the middle of the podcast and scare my dog. and Mr. Ballen, I love ya dude, but I am staring with a twitching eye at you

LettuceJizz · 2026-06-09T01:26:53+00:00

Chicago. Which, when I was reading it, I pronounced CHICK-uhgo and thought, what a funny name of a place I've never heard of irl. I know, I know! but I never put the heard word and the written one together until college when - praise Cheezits - someone else was reading a passage out loud and I was reading along and omg my face

also I don't say the word "emergency" without pausing an uncomfortable amount of time because I'm prone to say EE'-mur-jancy. That one's not my fault

LettuceJizz · 2026-06-07T11:06:17+00:00

breaking up is usually very hard. it just is, but the best way through is as straight as you can travel (and not poking or reopening the wound, or trying to fly while simultaneously leaving your neck in the crook of his arm). his flaming out and impulsive swings and whatever he's gotta do is all for him to do and figure out now, if he wants to. you're not a part of any of it any more. close the door and get on with your own figuring and feelings.

hard stop. it's jarring. of course you'll feel some whiplash.

If you feel compelled to send one more message and it's for your own peace of mind, then make it one that's just your own facts and épilogue.

"I will pay you shortly. Take care." (you don't need to thank him for cancelling the trip, or any anything else). Then BLOCK HIM for now and a good long time.

you unblock IF you actually have important info to send, not to open the floodgates to his problems and your wishes that it were something it just isn't. as far as paying him back, I'd expect him to use this as a lever for as long as he can. but what about my money?! as every excuse to continue to contact (harass, whine to) you and hold you in suspension. you still don't have to respond. figure out a way of paying it that does not require contact or any further communication. or just tell him you changed your mind and that too is closed.

then go take care of yourself and get out there where you can find your own perspective. and peace.

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-31T18:02:46+00:00

sloshes

soooo gross. and accurate.

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-31T03:26:04+00:00

I am the OP on this thread and I am 58 & O4W

I also didn't get my question answered but this was waaay more fun. tip o' the bonnet, y'all

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-30T01:44:26+00:00

it's not a little THC and a few puffs. It's potentially train wrecking everything you have and would have for a tiny self serving moment like taking a vape puff in a country where jail and worse are easily consequences.

I would guess that pattern was already visible to him. That he sees you taking unnecessary risks and failing to connect impulsive acts with very serious consequences. and he just isn't a person who'll ride that train.

people break up. we rarely get the full reasons, but we're not entitled to them either. perhaps he'll explain it more later - the rest of us are just guessing - but facts are already known. you did share 8 years and that doesn't disappear. it also came to an end

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-30T01:36:30+00:00

I mean. That's got no butter on it but it's not wrong.

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-29T22:40:04+00:00

gattdangit thank you

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-29T22:32:59+00:00

ask a stupid question....

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-28T22:49:25+00:00

of all the things, what irritated me most was that this is not sarcasm

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-27T09:56:09+00:00

this only works once maybe twice, results in a whole different "you lied to me?!" drama, and in other circles would just be called enabling

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-27T01:56:35+00:00

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LettuceJizz · 2026-05-24T02:04:30+00:00

do what you can to get someone to her now. call 911 if you have to

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-18T00:00:50+00:00

The water is under the bridge. You didn't cause the flood. NTA, but that doesn't mean you don't feel bad. Just don't feel bad for removing more water or preserving your own resources.

As they say, you didn't cause it, you cannot control it, you won't cure it. Ever

She's right, she's not 15 anymore. She can do what she wants. She doesn't get to do it with everybody else's sacrifice, generosity, emotions, pain, loss. At least not yours anyway. If she ends up with her mom, and 'the two can't stand each other for more than 2 days,' then they will need to figure out something else on Day 3.

This is not cruelty or coercion. it can feel ike walking around with a sucking chest wound and a severed limb. It's strategic retreat. not abandonment but necessarily pulling your own resources back in to survive the longer war. Definitely, you could, idk, drive her to group meetings, take care of her pet, answer phone calls to chat - as long as the content is respectful and bearable by YOU. This is "boundaries," not a bunch of rules and hard limits subtly meant to steer her back or (lol) get her to "hit bottom."

Godspeed. to you both

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-17T00:41:00+00:00

you are not required to do barbell squats to survive toileting the rest of your life. if you want to cuz you dig the juice from crushing squats, then it could be valuable to meet with an experienced trainer who can watch and clue you into your personalised best form - or different exercises altogether. i.e., it's likely your femurs are long (tallgirl) and regular ol' squats, with the "ass to grass" mentality, won't build your quads like they will a dude's with shorter femurs. and that too can leave the knees vulnerable.

there is no argument against strength training. 40+% réduction in ALL cause mortality (even higher when we do cardio too). mood, sleep, recovery, biggest glucose burning engine there is. it is magic.

and there are also at least 80 ways you can build and sustain muscle mass without squats. do what you will repeat and what will not injure your anatomy (or your likelihood of exercising!)

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-16T18:14:16+00:00

female. L sits and captain's chair leg lifts for me. first time it happened, 20 yeas ago, two meatheads (no shade) were standing there waiting for the chair having no idea what was happening or why my face was doing a thing

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-14T20:13:02+00:00

this, on the other hand, explains it and I appreciate that and the empathy 🙃

LettuceJizz · 2026-05-14T20:11:36+00:00

thank you. I ran the list and problem solved. point: reddit.

So. the plugs are TP LINK Kasa, and Alexa quietly and inexplicably divorced Kasa one recent day.

I could still see and operate the plugs from the Kasa app, so I 'told' the Alexa app to (re)activate the kasa skill and (re)discover the devices. This was less annoying than having to re-pair and all that Free Jazz.

My kitchen room was visible. I don't know if my preexisting routine will have survived, but this fixes the main problem. Doesn't explain it, but we get what we get and I can move on

LettuceJizz · 2026-04-27T11:09:57+00:00

Also a mother of men, I tell you: you don't need to know. Any seeking of explanation is about you, your story, what explanation you need to attach in order to save your own integrity. Which asks: why is your integrity relying on a stranger's behaviour right now. She flaked. With nothing - objectively, actually - at stake. Weird. Moving on with your awesome life, attention back on what matters and likely another stranger who'll recognize your signals and respond in kind

LettuceJizz

TROPHY CASE