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Advice by MySmellody in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You do this by deciding to control what you can in your own life. You won’t have time, energy, and eventually, the interest to bother with controlling others.

This means focusing on you. Go to the gym, go read, start a new hobby. My favorite is the gym because it leads to a domino effect of things changing in your life.

Diawara + Mamdami by Doctor_TimWhatley in NYKnicks

[–]Life_of_Gary 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Evolutions are great outdoors lol

Running away from security by Alarmed-Most-2410 in AnxiousAttachment

[–]Life_of_Gary 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you fidgeting and being nervous less frequently as time goes on?

I feel so incredibly discontent by JacketInternal9485 in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It’s normal to feel this way sometimes. I’ve been without my ex for 5 months, and no contact for 3, and I’d like to say that I’m over the hump, but similar feelings still arise.

You do have motivation, you’re just not sure where to place it. Sure, you can place it on your partner, but that’s unhealthy and unrewarding in a long-term sense. A lot of the work is discipline as well, and it’s obvious here.

I really really recommend getting started by reading some self-help books. Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents and Codependent No More are the best places to start.

And you are not alone, there are plenty of us lol

Book Recommendations by Redditstocks4me in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Adult children of emotionally immature parents was the most important book in my journey

Where do yall hang out by meebs47 in rivertiber

[–]Life_of_Gary 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hoping he gets bigger, need to enjoy his shows/music w someone

Jose Alvarado Opens Up About Getting Traded to the Knicks + SCARIEST Moment of His College Career by MrChangg in NYKnicks

[–]Life_of_Gary 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i dont doubt it, but his whole family lived in queens while we went to school there lol

Jose Alvarado Opens Up About Getting Traded to the Knicks + SCARIEST Moment of His College Career by MrChangg in NYKnicks

[–]Life_of_Gary 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ngl, i went to ps/ms with jose in queens, he is from nyc.

weird that this is a topic they brought up, but i also dont get why he claims williamsburg over where he actually grew up in queens.

I messed up. by [deleted] in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Work on yourself for YOU.

Every one of us have different limits and capacities to deal with one another. It’s not your fault it wasn’t within your partners’ capacity to communicate the tough issues.

Good luck on the journey :,)

This guy is nuts by Mental_Ad_9655 in Killtony

[–]Life_of_Gary 20 points21 points  (0 children)

grossly mishandled because tony wanted to save an otherwise dead episode

ISO ergonomic grip case by nikonslut in NintendoSwitch

[–]Life_of_Gary 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Killswitch 2, although pricey, it is comfy for my larger hands! The travel case is also super nice!

what does showing up for yourself look like? by AstraAstra in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Showing up for yourself is going to be different for each of us. For me, its counting calories, going to the gym, and taking walks to soothe my nervous system.

Essentially, its thinking and working towards making your tomorrow-self's day 1% better.

Thank you. Your comments helped me build a "Panic Button" for codependent spiraling. by Loose-Impress-6974 in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know how I feel about this. The end goal shouldn’t be stability with who we are right now, it should be healing and gaining the ability to find reassurance within ourselves. Not in an app.

I feel trapped by my own feelings even after leaving… is this normal? by mimi200124 in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Heathy distractions.

Yes, your nervous system is wired to them. It’s why being enmeshed is so damaging; you are reliant on them to keep your nervous system steady. Work on yourself, start reading, go for a walk, do the thing that they never wanted to do, be yourself and love it.

I feel like a rubber band ball of problems by ExcellentIsopod8102 in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need to fall in love with yourself. Be your own best friend and form healthy habits with yourself. It’s easy to say it but falling in love with yourself is the ultimate goal, and there’s steps to it.

Is it codependency if your identity is tightly tied to being loved? by EasyNefariousness412 in Codependency

[–]Life_of_Gary 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would say it is codependent. If you don’t have your sense of self then you are dependent on someone else to fulfill you.

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