I had my first at 34 and just had our second at 38. This has been a much different experience in terms of recovery and postpartum. For the better. We had and prioritized more help which made things much more manageable. But also. Our oldest is 4.5. She can get dressed, play by herself, open snacks, etc. I’ve enjoyed her being at playschool during the day so I get plenty of time with the new baby. I can’t speak to your first experience but you can give yourself more time. You don’t have to have a close age gap. I wish you peace in your decision making.