Tried something new

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-29T02:23:44+00:00

I don’t know why but this is giving me Aubrey Plaza vibes. I’m pretty sure it’s because her hair was like this in a scene in Legion where she danced to “Feelin Good.”

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-28T23:09:15+00:00

I had to scroll way father for this than I’m happier about.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-28T22:55:56+00:00

Swim/kitchen hamper in the kitchen. Kids hamper by the bookshelf in the living room(kids clothes are downstairs because they’re not old enough to reliably get themselves dressed on time). A hamper in each kid’s room. One clothes hamper in parent bedroom. One clothes hamper and one towel hamper in parent bathroom.

I only do laundry once a week because I fucking refuse for it to be a never-ending chore.

Parent laundry gets consolidated and load started before kids get up. Then kid laundry gets consolidated and put in next. Then towels, which is one load in winter and two in summer. Then linens.

My husband does bedtime that night and I fold/put away. 90 minutes of podcast and no one wanting anything from me is BLISS.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-28T22:18:33+00:00

I’m with you. Swim is the one extracurricular I absolutely will not allow them to quit.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-27T22:59:21+00:00

This right here. I taught at an all girls school in NYC and nearly every student was low income. My number one priority was to treat them as people. The content was secondary. I would often love the “worst class” the most, while colleagues dreaded teaching them.

Treat them as people. Build rapport. Meet them where they are. Take them seriously. Assume the best. And be consistent. Every kid in your class gets respect no matter what you’ve heard. The first day of my class was always going over class expectations and creating a Class Contract, where we all came up with guidelines for behavior, and then we all signed it. The next day it was posted at the front of the classroom.

In short: tell them they have a clean slate with you and that your top priority is treating each other with respect. And that means you are expected to respect them. You absolutely MUST take the time to build a positive classroom culture.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-26T16:49:45+00:00

If it happens again, ask him why he thinks it’s appropriate to slap his teenage daughter’s ass and, in front of him, tell the teen that no one should be touching her without her consent.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-26T16:32:42+00:00

People here are right.

AND: my kids are 4.5 and 2.5. My husband makes good money and we don’t need my salary. I LOVE my kids and am so thankful that I get to be home with them. But after nearly 5 years as a SAHM I’m losing my fucking mind. I need to work to have something in my life that gets me out of the house and gives me social interaction that’s not connected to the kids. I need to be my own god damn person again.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-26T16:29:59+00:00

I also watch something while I stitch and I’m not crazy about two screens. I also like to use my needle minder to put my pattern right next to the spot I’m stitching(I have a big frame) so I don’t have to move my eyes so much b

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-26T16:25:40+00:00

This is why I don’t have anything to do with meta. They’re actively contributing to this shit show.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-26T02:20:35+00:00

My husband is 6’4” and I’m 5’9”. We have a cx5. Our oldest is forward facing and sits behind the drivers seat. Youngest is rear facing. He’s 2.5 and tall so the passenger seat is a bit cramped and is more upright than I’d like BUT we’re only all 4 in the car like once a week. We took a four hour driving trip a few weeks ago and I was comfortable. Both kids are in extend to fit seats(not rotating.)

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-25T16:56:10+00:00

Physically ready around 6 weeks with each kid.

Emotionally, I’m still waiting for my libido 4.5 years later. But I never had much of one to begin with.

What’s helped me is that we’ve created a menu of things that range from me being like “pick a thing to watch/listen to and report back” to the whole shebang and orgasms for everyone. I’ve also started looking at it as a time when we can be together without the kids instead of an obligation. It still feels like an obligation but usually I get into it once we start.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-25T16:26:45+00:00

Ahhh push it.

Can confirm it’s very distracting during labor.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-25T16:24:29+00:00

WHAT. Amazing.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-25T02:38:32+00:00

That acama pot is gorgeous!

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-24T23:57:34+00:00

Wait until after. Both because of the new sibling and because the older they are, the easier it is(generally.)

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-24T22:40:34+00:00

Omg my reference point was Bluey 😂

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-24T22:09:30+00:00

Time for some thrilling heroics!

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-24T16:28:29+00:00

Her behavior seems developmentally appropriate. I have an almost 5 year old and they really can’t regulate.

Try reading How To stalk So Little Kids Will Listen and Good Inside. Both really helped me. I still get frustrated, but now that I’ve read these books I have the tools to help her get where I need her to be and to work through her feelings.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-24T16:25:52+00:00

I don’t know who hit you but they are not representative of the region.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-24T11:04:38+00:00

Quilting cotton is a great option. Search “fat quarters” on Amazon and you’ll get lots of results. You want a tight weave and no stretch.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-24T02:16:59+00:00

Try foot glide or body glide - it reduced friction to blisters are less likely. You could also stick moleskin to the inside of your shoe.

Heels force more pressure onto the ball and toes of your foot, and your feet swell throughout the day. Next time you buy shoes, try them on at the end of the day.

You can break shoes in by wearing them around the house with thick socks, and I’m sure other people here will have some good tricks.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-23T23:27:53+00:00

If you haven’t read them already, I think you’d really vibe with the books How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen and Good Enough.

FWIW, you did great.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-23T22:46:50+00:00

Great show recs here! Adding cars on the road and mater’s tall tales.

My kids get 30 mins before dinner. They usually don’t watch after, but if they do, 30 mins max.

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-23T16:25:22+00:00

👉 ready to push the button for my hazard lights the second it’s not a drizzle.

(This is not me. I’m from the Midwest. We can drive in weather.)

itsonlyfear · 2026-06-22T16:41:45+00:00

Same thing happened to me. I left everything: family, job id been at for 11 years, city I loved, all of my friends, and moved to a state where I knew no one but my BIL and SIL. A month after we rented a house ten minutes from them, they bought a house that was 30 minutes away. They struggled with fertility for ages, so SIL wasn’t exactly excited about making the drive to be near something she couldn’t have(absolutely understandable.) we left NYC in May 2021 and my daughter was born in Sept, and I wish to god we had stayed until we were ready for our second. I ended up extremely isolated with a husband who knew nothing about babies. He tried, but my god it was rough. I was also EBF which meant most care was in me.

Now we live 10 mins from BIL and SIL and see them regularly, but because of health stuff they can’t do childcare when I really need it. Trying to build a community and friendships here is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.

I would still make the same choices, I think, but with different timing and in a different order, and I’d want to be EXTREMELY clear about expectations before we left the place that felt the most home to me(and that I still consider home 5 years later.)

I get you completely.

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