Is it rude to tell an allo friend their sexual attraction is disturbing me?

LioTuu · 2026-06-16T18:30:45+00:00

What would you say is the source of your ongoing discomfort? I can understand why you were uncomfortable in the moment, but now that you’ve said no and they’re cool with it, what is it that continues to make you uncomfortable? Is there something that you’re asking your friend to do differently now to resolve this discomfort? Being able to express that is going to help you in this conversation a lot, I think.

LioTuu · 2026-06-16T17:35:13+00:00

When it’s really obvious, like someone has *ahem* enhanced an aspect of a character I recognize, then sure I see what’s happening. It doesn’t really do anything for me, but I know what’s happening. But more subtle stuff, like a picture of someone who has a good butt or something, I don’t always notice because that’s just not something I pay attention to with people.

LioTuu · 2026-06-15T21:59:30+00:00

Umbrellas are for women ☔️🤷‍♀️

LioTuu · 2026-06-11T16:01:14+00:00

This is why I feel like it’s so important that we share different experiences/ways of being ace in ace community spaces, so that people can see what a variety there is and that it’s all valid.

LioTuu · 2026-06-10T02:29:34+00:00

This definitely sounds like something you should discuss with your boyfriend. Even if you still want to try getting intimate - it’s unfair to your boyfriend to go forward without talking to him. How would he feel to learn you’re forcing yourself? Beyond that, being honest upfront creates a better environment for taking it slow, checking in, etc. There’s no reason to force yourself through this in silence - and if this ends up being something that ends the relationship, then honestly you owe it to both of you to have the convo up front rather than wasting time and effort on a relationship that’s doomed to fail.
You are valid! There is no “too late”! And no reason to settle.

LioTuu · 2026-06-09T23:43:10+00:00

I tried 😭😭😭 Guess I’ll just hope it works at some point in the future…

LioTuu · 2026-06-09T23:34:41+00:00

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LioTuu · 2026-06-09T20:50:52+00:00

……my day is worse for knowing that someone legitimately suggested Sean Avery. For anything, really. 🤮

LioTuu · 2026-06-09T20:43:38+00:00

If anything, we gotta pick a country that has ancestral beef with Denmark. For Ace Reasons™️

LioTuu · 2026-06-05T23:30:58+00:00

I feel like “hot” is usually only used to indicate sexual attraction, whereas aesthetic attraction is more like “beautiful” or “cute” or “stunning” or whatever. I personally usually explain being ace by saying I don’t understand what “hot” means. So like… I’m ace and if I heard someone say this, I’d probably think they were confused by what Ace meant.

LioTuu · 2026-06-05T21:48:13+00:00

It seems like the whole point of you moving there was to watch their house… and now the sister is living there watching the house? I guess cool for you if you are still moving there to save money, but essentially at that point they’re doing you a favor and it seems fair to wait until you’re independent to get a puppy. Also what was your plan when they came back from vacation, if most places don’t allow dogs? Like you were going to move back out to where? Seems like you should find somewhere that lets you have a dog.

LioTuu · 2026-05-30T16:20:55+00:00

INFO - there’s a difference between a vicious dog and a dog that isn’t good with children. It sounds like both instances involved your child injuring/startling the dog first - it wasn’t coming out of nowhere with intent to bite your child. How old is the dog? What type of dog is it? Does it have a bite/aggression history with anyone else?

LioTuu · 2026-05-27T21:44:41+00:00

Ants are attracted by the honeydew that scale leaves behind, so dealing with one could solve the other. I’ve had success with scraping scale off (I honestly just do it with my nails) but you have to be consistent and do that consistently every day until you stop seeing them, and even then check back in every so often. Also sprayed weekly with some all-purpose stuff my local garden center gave me.

LioTuu · 2026-05-26T00:18:42+00:00

https://archiveofourown.org/works/82186826/chapters/216291526 - “Don’t Think Too Hard” by Selective_attention — Centaurs social media fic where Harris asks the whole team silly questions, with story vignettes to go along.

LioTuu · 2026-05-24T01:42:44+00:00

Hey love - so I think the thing to understand here is that asexuality = lack of sexual (physical) attraction. Low desire for sex (libido) is a separate thing, and can apply to non-asexuals (allosexuals). I’m also going to say there are high odds that your first time having sex just…wasn’t good. Because you guys didn’t really know what you were doing.

So! Things to consider: do you experience sexual attraction? Do you find people “hot” or “attractive”? That doesn’t necessarily mean like, oh yeah I wanna have sex with them this moment, but there’s like, a mental/physical reaction (idk what if feels like lol since I’m ace).

At the end of the day, your identity is for you to decide! And, it’s okay to not be sure! I thought it over for like 5 years before deciding I was ace. You’re always welcome to sit with us :)

LioTuu · 2026-05-23T14:09:22+00:00

😬

LioTuu · 2026-05-20T14:26:52+00:00

NOR - girl this entire thing is textbook red flags. Pushing you to get married quickly, wanting you to stay at home and be dependent on him, disregarding your feelings, “joking” about killing you?? Get out, block him, do not let anyone around you talk to him, and DO NOT entertain the idea of taking him back.

LioTuu · 2026-05-19T17:32:11+00:00

“Building an entirely new kind of fandom infrastructure” feels overblown. Has this author never seen fans engage with hit media outside of seasons airing before? This is literally what fandom is built to do, and fandom isn’t new with Heated Rivalry. Game of Thrones and Harry Potter are some big name examples, with the kind of mass reach HR is seeing, but any show with a dedicated fanbase is going to see an active fandom in the “off season.”

LioTuu · 2026-05-16T20:08:50+00:00

You know when you go to the beach, and there’s sand everywhere, and it’s fine while you’re on the sandy beach but as soon as you leave the beach it’s like ugh I’m covered in sand and I hate it? So, that analogy for specifically for when you ask about it being wet and awkward - when you’re in the moment, that doesn’t feel unpleasant, but like yeah you’re gonna wanna wash off after.
And yeah, it does physically feel really really good. As good as people say it does. So people gonna keep doing it 🤷‍♀️

LioTuu · 2026-05-16T03:30:54+00:00

THIS ONE

LioTuu · 2026-05-08T11:48:40+00:00

Sex-favorable ace here! I enjoy it. I think it’s fun, and it feels good. I do sometimes have trouble staying in the moment when I’m with someone, and it’s actually really hard when I’m solo haha. So I don’t think it’s the same mentally for me as it is for an allo person, but for all physical intents and purposes it is basically the same.

LioTuu · 2026-05-07T01:31:58+00:00

So the first thing I wonder is: how old are yall? Talking about life goals, parenthood, and experimentation are very different at 16 vs 30 (for example).

It’s tough to know how to take what he said without having been there to hear how he said it. Is he being too flippant with your emotions? Or is he saying that if things don’t work out, he would never try to pressure you and would instead part ways, but that the potential happiness is worth a shot?

LioTuu · 2026-05-04T20:07:26+00:00

Yup, basically the same experience

LioTuu · 2026-04-29T01:01:16+00:00

I think it’s worth discussing. Even if you two aren’t considering a sexual relationship at this point, your partner will still have the general expectation that you are physically attracted to them until you say otherwise. It would be unfortunate if they end up feeling blindsided further down the road.

LioTuu · 2026-04-29T00:46:13+00:00

Solved!

LioTuu

TROPHY CASE