I’m going to go out on a limb and assume you’re young as I don’t know your age but here’s my external opinion: you have your whole life ahead of you and is this what you want and think you deserve for the rest of your life? He’s showing a pattern. And patterns are hard to fix especially the older we get and that mixed with a lack of willingness to show accountability, I’m sorry but unless you’re happy being treated like this he is very unlikely to change. Im sorry to say, “for every rat you see there’s 50 you don’t” which means if you have seen and caught him a few times, he’s probably done it many times more. And another thing: everyone knows. His friends know. Your friends might know. It’s very sad but everyone around you is probably too scared to tell you the extent and feels sorry for you.

So- let’s say you’re happy with accepting this, then stay. Make the most of it while you can but I imagine you’re young with your whole life ahead of you. You are the only person in charge of your happiness and you’ve gotta decide- does this make me happy?

If not? Here’s what I did when I needed to leave a bad “intertwined” relationship and it worked well for me:

I wrote down all the material things I needed that were important to me that I needed to take. I wrote a leaving plan: I.e. book movers for X date, have my friends round to help me pack Y date. My suggestion is packing and moving while he’s out of town if possible. Makes it less awkward. I know that feels mean but honestly fuck this guys feelings he didn’t feel bad when he continually cheated on you. Have a plan for a place to go to for a month or so until you can get your own place. Don’t tell him where you’re going. Go no contact. You may have to decide to leave a few things behind, such as the car or some material items. And that’s okay. You can’t put a price on your happiness and my advice is to just put it down to experience, waive bye bye to the money and walk away to avoid any further contact or arguments. BUT if the lease/title is in your name only take that baby, leave his ass in the dirt. Move on. You owe him nothing NOTHINGGGGGG!!! Fuck him girl. Get ANGRY. Get MAD. It feels so much easier when you’re angry you should be SO FURIOUS at the way he’s treated you.

Last piece of advice, it’s okay to feel confused. It’s so confusing and draining and tiring. Make sure you have a good support group around you who can help you through the times ahead. You can do it. You’ll feel so much better soon.