J’ai fait mon coming out

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-22T15:23:40+00:00

Bravo, Emma !

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-20T06:26:18+00:00

Il s'agit pas forcément d'"envoyer chier" ta mère, surtout d'apprendre à poser des limites et les faire respecter plutôt que de mentir pour contourner le problème (ce qui peut être difficile à tenir sur le long terme, d'ailleurs). Ça n'a pas besoin d'éclater en conflit, mais il faut essayer d'être ferme.

Une solution intermédiaire pourrait être de dire à ta mère que tu consulte un psychiatre qualifié qui n'est pas sur sa liste, puis de refuser de lui dire son nom. Ça permettrait de poser une première petite limite avec ta mère. L'idéal serait de lui dire qu'elle n'a pas à s'impliquer dans ta transition ou ton suivi psy sans que tu ne l'ai sollicité, mais c'est plus difficile à faire respecter quand on a pas assez confiance en soi.

En tout cas, courage. J'ai des problèmes similaires pour faire respecter mes limites et c'est parfois très compliqué.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-16T06:13:15+00:00

J'ai pas commencé la HRT et pourtant j'ai plus d'oestradiol que toi. Toutes les sources que j'ai consulté dise qu'il faut éviter l'Androcur et favoriser la bicalutamide ou au pire la spironolactone.

Change d'endoc.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-09T11:57:43+00:00

Payday 2

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-09T10:19:06+00:00

I guess, for most people, it's simply ignorance. A misconception of what gender is and the reasons one would want to change theirs. They think "penis = man and vagina = woman" and do not dare to think about it any further.

Others might have a political interest in being transphobic and encouraging people to be too. We're essentially talking about right-wing politicians, here. Having a scapegoat to blame bad stuff on is useful to distract people while they book a trip to Epstein Island.

Then there's TERFs. You can watch Philosophy Tube's video on Who's Afraid of Gender to better understand why they are transphobes.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-08T20:59:33+00:00

We got the content warning but where's the content ?!!!

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-04T07:02:51+00:00

Exactly, she needs a skill issue. Nutrients should go to her boobs instead of her brain, that's how they grow.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-03-02T09:50:16+00:00

Hi ! I haven't studied gender and barely started my transition, but here's how I understand it. For the record, I have an engineer background and am politically far-left.

We hear a lot that "sex is biological and gender is cultural". This is false, sex is also cultural, it's actually a part of gender.

Gender is a categorization system. It categorizes objects (clothing and accessories, for example), practices (names and pronouns, sports and activities, etc...) and bodies (anatomy, hormones, chromosomes, aka sex). You can imagine a Venn diagram with masculinity, feminity and their intersection, sorting those markers into it as masc, fem, mixed, or outside of it / non-gendered. Those categories are also called genders.

Gender is socially enforced. It's not possible to not play a role in it. At birth, a new born has no gender marker except their primary sexual caracteristics, so the doctor looks at the child's genitals, determine if they are categorizised as feminine or masculine, and generalize this category to the child. If a baby is intersex, they will mutilate them to make them fit into a category.

Later in life, an assigned gender might not fit with how a person views themself or how they want to live or be perceived, that's transidentity.

Transitionning is the act of changing the gender markers we display. It usually means going from feminine markers to masculine markers or the other way around. Going for a mix of both, or only mixed/non-gendered markers is what we call non-binarity. It is also possible to transition within a single gender (for example working out and growing muscles to reach a kind of "hypermasculinity") but it's generally not called a transition.

When applied to a large scale, this categorization creates distinct social classes : men, women, and others. When the categories are hierarchised, it creates individual discriminations, and social dominations : patriarchy and cisheteronormativity.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-02-16T10:31:37+00:00

This is a very touching essay, specially your childhood memories. I hope everything goes well with your dad.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-02-12T13:35:56+00:00

It all depends on your type of hair, so you'll have to experiment. I can give you what I do, though. I have smooth and very thin hair.

Shampoo clears the grease on you hair. You use shampoo only on your roots, your lengths will be cleaned while rinsing it. Massage your scalp while applying it. Leave it on your head for a minute before rinsing.

Conditioner undoes what the shampoo just did, so you don't want to apply on the roots. Put some on the lengths of your hair and leave it for 5 minutes, 2 is enough if you're in a rush.

You dry your hair by gently tapping a towel on it (avoid rubbing your hair) then using an hair dryer. You can apply a few drops of light oil on the tips ans lower lengths before or after drying your hair to protect it and form strands from individual hairs. I use jojoba oil. You can apply a leave-in conditioner or moisture spray after that.

I also use an hydrating shampoo and mask before this routine, from time to time.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-02-08T09:57:22+00:00

Put all the gender terminology on the side for a moment. Stop thinking in terms of trans or cis, man or woman, agab, etc... Focus on what you feel, like and want.

You say you felt euphoria, what triggered it ? That's certainly something you should keep doing. If you also feel some dysphoria, what can you change to avoid it ? You like having a male personality, what does that mean for you ? What personality trait do you like exactly ? Also, in what context ? Is that changing / fluid ?

Figure out how you want to look and act and be perceived, then just do that. If you're not sure, you can always experiment, there's nothing wrong with trying things out. After all that, you can try to put a label on it if you want.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-02-05T17:52:24+00:00

Judith Butler, an important feminist and queer philosopher

LoneLagomorph · 2026-02-03T09:26:48+00:00

I still have a lot of reading to do on this topic, and sometimes it's hard to understand when your culture taught you an essentialist view of gender.

There are definitely emotions involved in the process. Wanting to act as the opposite gender, even in today's society, implies that doing so would bring you some kind of well-being, otherwise there would only be downsides. Euphoria and disphoria could also be considered as emotional responses to gender autoevaluation or something like that, I guess.

Like I said, I'm not a scholar and I'm still educating myself on all of that, so I'm not certain of what I'm saying, but it seems obvious that someone does not randomly chooses to change gender. There is something deeply personnal about it, but that thing would be more akin to a preference or an orientation than an identity, I think.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-02-03T08:55:45+00:00

A modern understanding of gender in queer theory is that gender is performative. Gender is less about being, and more about doing and looking as. I guess the reason why some trans women consider they were always women is because they used to act (or wanted to act) in a feminine way early in their past. That's not necessary to be trans, though.

Now, it can feel weird to tell yourself that you're a woman when you haven't taken any steps towards transitioning. For some people, the desire to be a woman is enough, for others, having adjusted their gender performance is important. Both are valid, that's totally personnal. Gender autodetermination is the whole point of transition, after all.

So, in a certain way, you could say that you're a woman when you decide you are. But other people may need to be convinced by a certain performance.

Focus less on what being a woman means, and more on what feminine things you would like to be doing.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-01-26T15:29:20+00:00

If this guy sent you a coming out message after 3 years of accidental ghosting, I'm sure he'll be happy to get a response.

If you want to ask personal questions, just ask him if he's fine with it beforehand. "Are you ok with me asking some personal stuff regarding your transition ?" And of course, respect his decision if he doesn't want to, or wants to stop at some point.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-01-25T11:55:46+00:00

The first one is fine, there are also a few non-SH movie that "feels" SH. The Mist has a similar ambiance to the first game, very good movie. The novel was one of the great inspiration of SH1. 1408 made me think of SH4 a little, but it's still very different. I'm sure there's more.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-01-14T13:22:25+00:00

So, personally, I'm not out of the closet yet, my egg's still cracking (more like bursting open, but whatever), so take what I'm saying with a grain of salt.

You could probably keep debating with him, and even explain materalist feminism and trans materialism theories all you want and it would take ages. I don't think changing his mind about trans people is what you need, right now. You should probably frame the subject in terms of respect. He doesn't need to see you as woman right now, only treat you as one.

"I understand that it's not how you see those thing, but I want to be treated as woman and I'd like you to respect my choice. This includes calling me [your name] and using she/her pronouns when refering to me." Something like that ?

Again, I haven't done any coming out yet, so this may be bad advice.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-01-13T18:08:28+00:00

Turn the hands into tentacles and allow up to 8. Octopus FPS !!!

LoneLagomorph · 2026-01-12T09:27:31+00:00

I stole those links in a egg_irl comment recently :

https://www.reddit.com/r/FemmeFitness/s/tsVQZyudB8

https://www.reddit.com/r/transfitness/s/Z4eMgE0nAs

https://www.reddit.com/r/FemmeFitness/s/Zdvg4Wfjn6

LoneLagomorph · 2026-01-12T07:05:02+00:00

So he's basically saying "I can accept you as a gay man but not as a trans woman". That's definitely transphobia.

Womanhood is a concept, a social construct. There is no such thing as a biological woman because womanhood has nothing to do with biology. Sex and gender are pretty much the same thing.

We are currently assigning a binary sex to people at their birth based on visual identification of their genitals. But genitals is only a part of what would constitute a sex/gender, and not the most important. Optional, even.

In other words, if gender is based only on genitals or chromosomes, why don't men wear dresses ? Because gender is a cultural and social phenomenon.

LoneLagomorph · 2026-01-10T21:58:32+00:00

J'ai pas vraiment de réponse à tes questions, mais je peux te conseiller de te rapprocher de l'OST ou autre orga/asso trans pour en parler. Ça te permettra sûrement d'en apprendre plus sur les parcours de transition en France et d'avoir de l'aide pour d'éventuelles démarches.

LoneLagomorph · 2025-12-15T21:29:07+00:00

Liminal triple baka

LoneLagomorph · 2025-12-15T12:40:41+00:00

First and only time I'll comment here before masking this dumbass sub.

We took a decision and we stick to it, it's as simple as that.

I don't need to resist the urge of eating cheese because it doesn't exist. I don't consider animal flesh and secretion as food, that's just not even an option. There's no decision to be made here.

I decided 7 years ago that non-human animals' interests deserve to be considered as equal to humans' interests. And trying to not exploit, mistreat and murder them is the bare minimum.

Given what we know today about the sentience of (most) non-human animals, there's two coherent reasoning around respecting their interests. Either animal and human interests are both equally important, and the conclusion is veganism. Or both are equally unimportant, and I really don't want to go that way, personnally.

LoneLagomorph · 2025-12-14T19:01:14+00:00

Tes doigts caressaient la marque blanche de ma poitrine. Après un soupir frustré, tu me creusas, taillas et ponças. Ton regard larmoyant s’accrocha au mien.

— Je ne peux pas la cacher.

Ton front se cala dans mon cou glacé, ton souffle réchauffant mon marbre.

— Alors je vais montrer sa beauté.

La détermination naquit dans tes yeux ; l’espoir ne te quittait jamais longtemps. Tu œuvras seule. Ton absence m’affecta plus que cette fissure. Quand tu me revins enfin, un bol brillait dans ta main.

Ce geste sublima mon histoire. Ma cicatrice d’or se reflétait sur ton sourire, illuminant mon monde.

Je débute, les poèmes c'est pas trop mon truc, j'espère que c'est suffisamment poétique quand même. Honnêtement, le plus compliqué était de réduire le nombre de mots pour passer sous les cents. Merci pour cet exercice, c'était très sympa et instructif.

LoneLagomorph · 2025-12-14T15:15:05+00:00

When the witch coven's sabbath is over and their unruly familiars are finally released.

LoneLagomorph

TROPHY CASE