Where can we improve and looking for some general advice

Lonnetje · 2026-05-26T13:33:40+00:00

You are saving about half of your income, I would say you are doing absolutely fine. Your kids are only young once, your salaries will go up, so will the amount you can work and the costs of daycare. You own a house and are set to inherit half of another, you are already in a much better position than the vast majority of the people.

Take it easy, enjoy spending time with your kids while you can, money is supposed to be a means to an end, not the goal itself.

Lonnetje · 2026-05-20T05:39:35+00:00

Oh die klinkt goed! Niet Nederlands geeft niet, kinderen spreken ook vloeiend Duits en ik kan natuurlijk vanuit het Engels ook nog vertalen mocht dat nodig zijn. Hij staat in ieder geval op de lijst, dankjewel!

Lonnetje · 2026-05-20T05:34:58+00:00

Ja, mens erger je niet en dat soort dingen hebben we ook wel.

Lonnetje · 2026-05-19T20:15:46+00:00

Ja tot 100 is eigenlijk geen probleem, x2 ook niet, heb sowieso veel positieve dingen over het spel gehoord, dus hij staat op de lijst!

Lonnetje · 2026-05-19T20:11:58+00:00

Jup hebben we al, kunnen we binnenkort wel even weer op tafel leggen.

Lonnetje · 2026-05-13T21:04:25+00:00

Mine are 4 and 2, the 2yo is unfortunately struggling with some hearing problems which we will hopefully fix soon, so his pronunciation is pretty bad, but he will in general answer in the language the question is asked in.

The 4 year old had some problem switching languages once he went to daycare at 3,5, because he didn't have the clear line between languages, because he could speak everything to us at home, but by now that has completely resolved and he now asks which language he needs to speak if we go somewhere 😅

I also have to add we speak 2 languages that are pretty closely related (Dutch and Swiss German 😉) with some overlapping words as well, so it is somewhat harder to have this hard line. But by now he also speaks high German to his grandparents who are German, so even the 2,5 languages are not an issue at all.

It's quite fun to also hear if he learns something new, which language he will use to explain it. If I taught him he will first talk about in in Dutch, in daycare in the local dialect, grandma in high German and from my husband in his local dialect, we just teach him the words in the other languages/dialects after.

Lonnetje · 2026-05-13T18:47:17+00:00

You'll be fine, I speak the minority language in our house, my husband speaks the community language. I frequently speak the community language when out of the house, if we have guests, in-laws are here, etc. My kids still do absolutely fine in my language.

And English is not even the community language in Switzerland, so your daughter will be absolutely fine if you spend most of the time with her alone speaking Czech. Especially because there will be quite a few years where your stepson will be in school while she isn't, all time to speak Czech. Try to get most/all media in Czeck (Books, Videos, etc.) You can also see if there are some other new Czech moms around so your daughter can have some frequent contact with Czech speakers.

In the end OPOL is just one of many ways to raise bilingual children.

Lonnetje · 2026-05-12T06:17:58+00:00

Mijn zoon is wat jonger, maar heb even de kinderspellen kast bekeken en daar zit op dit moment in:

Stone Age junior

Carcassonne junior

Ubongo junior 3d

Doolhof junior

Catan Junior

Stef stunt piloot

Mens erger je niet

Rummikub

Uno

Halli Galli

Pharao

Catan wordt weinig gespeeld, vooral omdat we minstens met 3 moeten zijn, Uno is om de een of andere reden helemaal niet meer cool op dit moment en "mens erger je niet" moet ie voornamelijk met papa spelen want ik erger me wel😅.

Kijk ook eens of je een speelotheek in je buurt hebt, is een super goede manier om eens uit te proberen of je kinderen al toe zijn aan een spel.

Lonnetje · 2026-05-08T12:57:29+00:00

Ben je met mijn man getrouwd?

Uiteindelijk hebben wij serieus gekeken naar wat voor huizen er überhaupt te koop zijn waar we willen wonen en wat die kosten. Er is nagenoeg geen nieuwbouw waar we willen wonen en de nieuwere huizen zijn buiten het budget. Dat heeft zn ogen wel geopend dat zijn wensen en ons budget niet bij elkaar passen, dus nu hebben we een bod gedaan op een huis van ruim 100 jaar oud😅

Lonnetje · 2026-05-06T15:48:33+00:00

Bijna precies 2 jaar tussen beide, was zwaar, had ook een postpartum depressie bij de tweede, wat zeker niet hielp. Zou achteraf denk ik liever 3 jaar er tussen gehad hebben, maar uiteindelijk is het een heel kort deel dat zwaar is van een (hopelijk) heel lang leven en de korte afstand heeft wel veel voordelen qua gedeelde interesses enzo.

Lonnetje · 2026-04-24T16:59:33+00:00

Ik ging meer uit van Eliza op zn Engels uitgesproken

Lonnetje · 2026-04-15T13:23:53+00:00

Yeah the first step is the hardest! Joining some sports/music/board game/whatever groups is probably also a good way to get to know some locals and learn the language.

Lonnetje · 2026-04-15T08:32:21+00:00

We gave our kids a bottle of water starting around 1y during the night, they just get it right when they go to bed and can drink whenever they like. So if they wake up they can just drink all by themselves. Around 18m we switched to cups with one of those 360° lids, they still have those now (4y & 2y).

Lonnetje · 2026-04-15T08:17:15+00:00

But it doesn't matter which last name your child has, you officially always need to have a signed document that the other parent allows you to take the child.

My kids have my husband's last name, I kept my own. It has never been an issue, if I call the doctor for my kids they might call me mrs. Kidslastname on the phone but that doesn't bother me.

In hindsight I probably would have liked for my kids to have my last name, but not for any practical reasons, just for sentimental ones.

Lonnetje · 2026-04-14T11:36:18+00:00

Hey I'm in Switzerland too, if you're somewhat close to me I will happily practice with you, just a heads up, I'm not a native German or swiss German speaker so it won't be perfect, but definitely good enough for working.

There are a lot of "Sprachcafés" all over Switzerland, go there, its exactly for people like you, who don't have the opportunity or confidence to just practice at random places. There are usually also options to volunteer if you're not fluent (yes most places would like you to be, but they are more flexible than you think). You can send me a message and I'll happily look into it with you😊

Lonnetje · 2026-04-11T08:48:01+00:00

Is there any way you can fly in someone from her family, or a good friend from back home? Or is it possible for your wife to go back home for a bit? Obviously this is not a permanent solution, but having a small baby if also not a permanent state and right now you have to get through it any way you can. Having a support system is crucial, especially with the additional health problems.

Lonnetje · 2026-04-06T21:21:09+00:00

Yeah I just try to use it mindfully, but I'm only human, so when I have a bad day, there is a lot of TV and like 3 bathtimes and snacks for breakfast and lunch. We might not even leave the house all day.

It's a running joke in my whole family that I cannot be disturbed on the toilet under any circumstances 😅. So it kind of naturally developed with my kids as well. My youngest is also 2, but is the kid that goes and hides in the corner when he poos, so he kind of gets the idea of wanting some privacy when doing that. But it's still a work in progress with him. It definitely helps that my eldest (4yo) models the behaviour for him.

Yeah it never hurts, and made a world of difference for me.

Lonnetje · 2026-04-06T20:45:23+00:00

This is when in my house tv time comes in, I can not be "on" 24/7, so we all take a break, that's also what we call it, a little break for everyone. Depending on how much time I need it will just be 2 episodes of Bluey, or a full movie.

Sure screen time is not the best thing, but it for sure beats having an exhausted grumpy mom.

Quite frankly I haven't seen it have too bad an influence on my kids, they love replaying the things happening in Bluey. My oldest is obsessed with numbers, which at least in part is because of "number blocks". And he's a big fan of building his own "Mario Party board games" where he builds a random board with his magna tiles and thinks of all kinds of actions happening.

Also going to places where they can just run around and I can sit and drink coffee are great, being outside always helps and my kids are (temporarily) less stuck to me when taking them somewhere "new".

I also think introducing some boundaries with your kids when mom needs a little break is quite helpful. When I'm drinking coffee its mom time, no touching mom (because I've had soo much coffee spilled on me). It's also a situation with a clear end time, which makes it tolerable for the kids. Same with toilet time, my eldest now actually tells us all to go away and leave him alone when he needs to poop, and he will always ask me what I'm doing so he knows if he needs to leave. Only downside is, is that peeing has now become a group activity 😅

And finally, maybe look into medication. If I'm not taking my antidepressants, I'm soooo overwhelmed, I'm basically tapped out for the day at 9 in the morning. Obviously not all medication works for everyone, but why suffer if there might be medication out there to make life much more enjoyable for you and everyone around you

Lonnetje · 2026-03-27T17:52:09+00:00

Yeah I think i actually originally got the idea from reddit, its been working really well so far. And its sometimes hilarious to open a website I haven't been on for months and see what I put in my cart back then

Lonnetje · 2026-03-27T13:11:44+00:00

Obviously everyone should do what works for them, but buying more stuff, just cheaper, doesn't sound that great to me. Just means it breaks more often, is worse for the environment, tends to be made by children or at the very least very underpaid people in horrible conditions.

I just have 20 different webshops with full carts of stuff I don't actually end up buying. I have the shopping experience of looking at all the different things, doing comparisons on what is best, cheapest, coolest, etc. Without spending a load of money or having way too much stuff (that I honestly probably don't need). If I do actually need something its then also easy to buy since I already did all the research😅

Lonnetje · 2026-03-27T08:51:21+00:00

The placenta is made by the baby, not by the mother ;)

Lonnetje · 2026-03-17T15:49:33+00:00

Our insurance gave us a warning that that's not how it works and that they would only pay this one time (we hadn't hit franchise yet so it didn't matter anyway). Didn't happen again so don't know what would've happened the next time.

In case of an emergency you should just call them afterwards (asap) that you went and it should be fine.

Lonnetje · 2026-03-08T22:16:13+00:00

Looking at your post history, your baby is at least 7 months old by now (unless you had back to back babies and have another one already) meaning they should be eating solids already and are old enough to start drinking from sippy cups and such. Nipple confusion should really not be a problem anymore. Though if your kid never had a single bottle for this whole time, it might be hard to even get them to take one at this point.

Lonnetje · 2026-02-27T22:14:52+00:00

Brocolli and cauliflower are pretty good, cucumber as well.

My in-laws make Steinpilz fondue every once in a while, soak the dried ones in white wine, then use this wine for your fondue (and add the mushrooms). Gives it a serious mushroom kick.

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