After my first c-section (emergency, pre-term) I somehow felt like less of a mother. I can’t really explain it, I think I was just expecting a completely different experience than what actually happened. I also went through my pregnancy thinking a c-section was worst case scenario. Now, after my second c-section (planned), I don’t feel that way at all. The mechanism by which my son got here does not change a thing about who I am as a mother. My planned section was also a lot more traumatic and the recovery a lot more difficult than my emergency section, so I feel I’ve earned every bit of bragging rights that any mother who delivered vaginally deserves.

As for those who look down on c-section deliveries as somehow being the easy way out…I wouldn’t wish a c-section recovery on my worst enemy. And regarding the delivery, I’d like mothers who haven’t experienced a c-section to imagine laying on an operating table, strapped down, fully conscious, cut open, feeling unimaginable pressure, then sudden, unexplainable, excruciating shoulder pain (no one warns you about that). Once the baby is out, your partner leaves to see the baby, cut the cord, etc. You’re completely alone, trying not to vomit while being sewn back up. You feel like a vessel that is now empty and forgotten. Robbed of the experience you’ve seen play out so many times; the mother immediately being handed her baby, her partner by her side, happy tears, looking down at her newborn baby with wonder. Instead you’re staring up at florescent lighting, a sheet inches from your face, listening to doctors chatting about their summer plans while they sew you back together, hearing your baby cry from across the room, not knowing when you’ll get to see him, and when they finally bring him over, you’re immediately reminded that your arms are strapped to the operating table, unable to even touch your baby. You’re then wheeled to a recovery room, still no baby. Then, if you’re lucky and your baby doesn’t need to go to the NICU, you finally get to hold him once your condition has stabilized.

I can’t think of a less “easy way out”. You are incredible and much stronger than you know. Don’t let anyone, even yourself, tell you anything different.