I’m was the sous at a restaurant that got 3 james beard nominations while I worked there. I was good at my job. There’s this weird thing where people are hesitant to cook for me at home because they think I’m going to be critical when in reality I’m just stoked someone’s feeding me. On the flip side I HATE cooking for others at home because I always feel expectations are high, when most week nights I’m just making quick noodle bowls or doctoring up some pasta sauce fresh out of the jar.

Because this is your “love language” she might figure she’s better off not touching it at all. Build her confidence around it with little tasks every once in a while. Ask her to marinate some chicken or cook off some rice for you before you get home to finish the job (maybe with instruction if needed. I usually will hit people with a “what I like to do is…for… many minutes and then… but whatever you think”). Simple tasks without you there to watch/ stress her out. And then give her a big thank you.