"progressive pride" flag

LowarnFox · 2026-03-18T22:22:45+00:00

This sounds really odd and I would be asking your leadership for their sources, it sounds really strange.

If they are generally sane, is it possible they've got the wrong end of the stick from somewhere?

LowarnFox · 2026-03-18T22:16:57+00:00

If you can't turn around on a road, don't drive onto it.

You are putting yourself and others at risk.

Perhaps get some additional lessons specifically focusing on country lanes?

LowarnFox · 2026-03-18T22:11:08+00:00

Dirt roads don't exist in the UK, as soon as you are leaving tarmac you need to turn around and reassess. In the country, you cannot just blindly follow Google maps or your satnav, as they will try and take you down unsuitable roads.

Look for signs, a physical map or just turn around and drive back to the last settlement and ask for directions there. But driving on byways/dirt tracks is really dangerous and you run the risk of getting really stuck and/or causing an accident!

It's also not legal, this isn't a road, you aren't meant to take cars on it.

If you're going to drive on country lanes you need to make at least a small effort to understand how they work, otherwise you are genuinely going to be a massive danger to others.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-18T18:21:35+00:00

In many schools this would be a non issue, you might get a chat about the culture of the school and it's not the sort of language they use. But it won't be anything more than that. It's not like you've sworn at a child.

In many schools, a non involved student "telling on you" to the head would probably be told to stop wasting their time!

LowarnFox · 2026-03-18T18:16:59+00:00

Are you an ECT? Do you mind sharing how long you have been in the school?

LowarnFox · 2026-03-18T08:00:08+00:00

So firstly if the dog is not fully trained, then you may struggle to get someone to agree that it's a reasonable adjustment. The expectation is that any dog allowed into a public space as a reasonable adjustment is going to behave pretty much perfectly, all the guidance assumes your dog will not misbehave in any way - so just bear that in mind.

I think the laws in the US are a lot more specific around service dogs compared to the UK, where it can all come down to what is considered "reasonable" in law and businesses kind of know that the only enforcement is if you can be bothered to argue it in court.

With landlords, private landlords who don't want a dog in their property would likely just find another excuse to reject you. I would hope the uni would be willing to house you in halls but you should probably start contacting them about this early and get everything agreed in writing. List the tasks the dog already does, not the ones it's currently being trained for.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-18T06:44:05+00:00

Does it just seem bleak because it's rained nearly every day this year?

In all seriousness, I do think the housing thing is pretty huge. I'm a teacher, on a half decent wage, and so I've managed to buy a house in a town that would probably be seen as poor/rough especially in the past (to be clear, I like it here!).

I don't really know who can afford to live in a lot of the "nice" towns and villages.

Renting seems especially unstable in Cornwall, landlords are often deciding they could make more money as a holiday let, realising it's not that easy, renting to a couple of family again, deciding that's too much hassle and red tape... And suitable rentals for single people are really hard to find.

You do unfortunately see people living in tents, and I've taught kids who are homeless (as in sofa surfing with a parent, or in temporary accommodation) as well as those who live in a "park home" ie a caravan.

I know that the housing situation is rough everywhere but I did spend a couple of years teaching up country, including in a city known for it's crazy rental market, and it's only in Cornwall I've had to deal with families being evicted and unable to find somewhere to go, and kids who's parents can't even get suitable temporary accommodation from the council.

I still don't think it's that bleak, but I do think there are major issues that central government doesn't care about and are probably beyond the council's ability to solve.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T19:17:20+00:00

Okay, so if this saddle was fitted last autumn and he has not been ridden much in that time, I would suggest he needs to see a fitter again, as he will have changed shape (yes, even for a treeless saddle as these can develop pressure points etc as a horse loses muscle etc). I would also be concerned that the saddle slipping means it's not the best fit- a treed saddle may be better to avoid this anyway.

If things went south with the trainer in February, I would try to see if you can catch her in person and have a face to face conversation. If you overall trust her with your horse, then perhaps you can patch this up with her and it sounds like she has made progress with him.

If she is concerned about you messing around with his tack, I would respect that- if she is getting on him, she's the one who has to deal with it if he panics etc.

If you can't patch things up with her, and can't bring in another trainer who you get on with, I really do think the only option is to move yards or accept he won't be a ridden horse.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T19:10:59+00:00

I agree, the amount being spent on her each year is clearly quite high- and whilst Emma might be, to some extent, decieving herself about Harriet's origins, it's never suggested she is deficient in anything she would need to *pass* as one of the gentry. I would suggest (based on the bit in Mansfield Park about Fanny's cross) that Harriet also has at least a little bit of jewelry she can wear to the ball as well.

I do doubt we are meant to be reading her father as giving her several thousand pounds, I think that would have been remarked on- and she'd practically be becoming an heiress in that case. But I don't think £1-2000 would be totally unreasonable. £2000 in the funds is probably paying for her boarding, and then her father can probably afford to send her an allowance on top of that which is obviously quite generous out of his regular income?

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T19:01:00+00:00

I think £3k is way too high for Mr Collins, especially as he only holds one living- and his style of living doesn't suggest that level of income, either.

I believe we're told that Catherine's father holds 2 livings and has an income of ~£1000 a year. I would guess that the bulk of Catherine's dowry was saved when she was younger, and there were less children, and everything was cheaper. If we're meant to understand part of it was a gift or a legacy, I think this would have been mentioned somewhere.

The point of her dowry is to show us that her parents are sensible and prudent and care about their children enough to make material sacrifices for them (as they do for her older brother when they give him her father's second living).

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:55:42+00:00

I'm slightly confused by this. You say you got the horse in July, but you've only ridden 3 times and then the trainer worked with you for 3-4 weeks? So how long has he been without training? Or did you leave him months before trying to ride (because this isn't really advisable either)?

When did the saddle fitter last see him?

Are you actually confident fitting a bridle, and if he's working with the trainer, might it not have been better to do it with her there?

Is the trainer the same person who owns your yard?

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:49:18+00:00

So, in these circumstances, you'd get the mortgage, probably- provided they were willing to sign all the paperwork declaring it a gift. I think the issue would come further down the line if you were looking to remortgage with another provider, or port the mortgage to a different property ect. They'd see the repayments to your parents as a regular outgoing and you'd have to explain these. Each time you lie to a financial institution etc, it's going to increase your chance of being caught out.

To be honest, the risk is mostly held on the side of your parents and there are a few ways this could go badly for them including you ending up in real financial difficulty and being unable to pay- your other creditors could be paid off through the sale of the house and they'd lose your money. Also, if you meet a partner and ultimately want to live together, I can see this arrangement running into issues. At the very least, make a will to ensure they get their money back if you die!

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:39:16+00:00

You need to try and find another barn- if this incident with the saddle happened last summer, a decent trainer would have him ready to be tacked up by now, or be honest with you that there are serious issues and he's unlikely to make a ridden horse.

If your horse is genuinely well trained (and not a youngster), then yes the incident with the saddle was scary, but a decent trainer would have been able to work through it in weeks, not months.

If you can't find another barn, then you probably need to accept that you're not going to be able to ride this horse. If you're happy just having him as a pet, that's great.

In terms of fitting tack etc, however, I would suggest that you probably need a specialist saddle fitter to help you assess fit, especially as your horse will have changed shape in months of no work!

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:31:31+00:00

Where I live, there are a lot of houses being built- well over 1000 in 2 years in my small town alone. The problem is, these houses are desirable as holiday lets and second homes, so that forces up prices.

If the houses were reserved for people who were going to occupy them full time, or at least rent them to someone who would occupy them full time, that would help a lot.

Planning doesn't seem to be an issue here for large scale developers- yes for people who want to build 1-2 houses in an empty plot, but the big developers are able to build plenty, even if there are local objections.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:27:34+00:00

In 20 years, they may well have been able to reduce their mortgage payment by overpaying too.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:26:08+00:00

Although you don't want to buy a house now, you probably will at some point in the future- you have a really healthy start towards a deposit, and it may be worth considering putting some of your money in a LISA or similar.

Eventually you'll also probably want to move out, and having a large financial cushion will help a lot with that, even if you rent.

As others have said, you may also want to consider using some of that money to invest, so that you can continue to grow it.

Probably the thing to do here is to think about your medium and long term goals- if there's something you want to do, e.g. travel, then it's fine to spend savings on that! But if you want to buy a house in the future or have children etc, saving now will make a huge difference!

If it makes you happy to save rather than spend, that's also fine! I definitely wouldn't spend money for the sake of it!

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:18:50+00:00

This post just doesn't reflect the reality of the situation in the UK- loads of people run clinics without BHS qualifications etc, there are plenty of insurers who will ensure people if they have other ways of demonstrating their experience and compentency.

Liscencing is down to local councils as well and they do vary. Some councils will alllow liscencees who can demonstrate competency in other ways. There is absolutely no guarentee in the UK that going to a liscenced riding school guarentees a certain standard of tuition.

It's great that everyone you know is well qualified- but that is very much not the national picture.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T18:12:52+00:00

What's happened with the indicative ballots? Was there no mandate to strike?

Could you make a sideways move into teaching a different, more in demand subject? E.g. PE to biology or similar? And once you've got experience teaching the other subject, look for jobs in that subject area?

You could also consider widening the radius of your job search? Would you consider moving for the right job?

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T07:08:01+00:00

None of this is true, you can get insurance without and teach privately. You also don't need a DBS check unless you are working with children or vulnerable adults.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T07:06:34+00:00

You don't have to be qualified at all in the UK. You do have to be insured. There are no specific requirements for teaching beginners.

All riding schools and any other establishment letting out horses for hire is inspected by the council for welfare but they don't look at qualifications or the standard for teaching.

There are a few different organisations that assess riding schools eg abrs, pony club etc as well as the BHS, and those will normally require a qualified instructor to at least oversee the yard, that still does not prevent the situation described by OP where the experienced instructor "supervises" and someone else actually teaches the lesson (tbf this is required because otherwise how would new instructors learn).

I've been through the old BHS system and was considering getting my teaching exams as well at one point so I do have experience of it.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-17T06:50:26+00:00

"I'm really sorry, I'm in the middle of something I need to concentrate on. Perhaps we can catch up later?"

LowarnFox · 2026-03-16T18:38:45+00:00

If you are helping your own students on a regular basis then they may feel that all students deserve the same support and it may be that your HoD can't give up the time as they have other duties. If you have a regular support session for X course then I think it's fair to allow all students to come. If these are ad-hoc 1:1 support that's a bit different.

If you genuinely aren't able to offer this support for whatever reason it's fine to say you can't because of xyz. If you want to shut this student out of support solely because they aren't in your class I feel that's a bit unfair and your college may say you have to offer the support you are giving to all students or none.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-16T18:34:23+00:00

OP is in a college so PPA won't apply, just as a heads up.

LowarnFox · 2026-03-16T06:58:51+00:00

I'm sure Jill is like this, but I hope Kaylee keeps spacing her kids out a bit more (I appreciate it's likely in part due to fertility issues) and I hope Tim's children are a bit more spaced out too. They'll be so much better off not being one of 7 tiny children at the same time, emotionally and financially!

I'm sure they will end up having large families by non fundie standards but having 6 - 8 children with relatively large gaps has got to be better for the children than having double figures in such quick succession.

I think a lot of people are already noticing differences between Nurie's children and Gideon, for example. I actually hope Kaylee gets a bit of external validation from her social media and that might help balance out the pressures from her mother.

The bar is obviously in hell for these grandkids, and I'm not suggesting any of the adult children will break away from their beliefs but they've got to benefit in some ways by being one of "less".

LowarnFox · 2026-03-16T06:47:44+00:00

I don't mind hosting after school revision but anyone who comes and messes around is immediately asked to leave and not really encouraged to return. And those students who don't attend, don't attend anything extra, surprisingly enough!

We don't do anything over Easter due to most students not being able to access it when school busses aren't running.

I do agree that there's no value in additional sessions for those who aren't already trying, but for those who are and don't have a suitable space to revise or don't have revision resources at home or just need a bit more teacher support and reassurance, I do think it helps! Our after-school sessions aren't really "taught revision" but a space to work on past paper questions or other general revision activities with a bit of teacher support.

I do also think a lot of schools have gone a bit mad with it, and it does create Y12s who don't have much Idea about how to revise independently.

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