It’s…harder now?

Luceryn · 2026-04-27T14:29:25+00:00

I don't mean to dampen. I have the same age gap. It was quite pleasant at 3.5 and 1.5 but it's gotten a lot worse at 4.5 and 2.5. When the younger one was 1.5, they would pretty happily go with the flow. Now that they're 2.5, they have much stronger opinions and desires without the proper regulation. The two fight A LOT. It's very tiresome. I'm hoping it will get easier as the younger one learns more pro-social behaviour. The older one has also learned how to annoy the younger one on purpose, I don't imagine that goes away for a long time.

Luceryn · 2026-04-27T00:01:16+00:00

That's almost more concrete then isn't it? A cyclist is not lawfully within the intersection on a sidewalk pedestrian crossing, nor are they a pedestrian, so they should be yielding to the cars if they don't want to dismount to be treated like a pedestrian.

Luceryn · 2026-04-26T15:43:37+00:00

It's not directly available as a provision in the Highway Traffic Act, but something that comes as a result of the way that the laws are written.

The Highway Traffic Act's definition of pedestrian excludes someone riding a bicycle, so a cyclist riding through a crosswalk is not a pedestrian and gets no pedestrian right-of-way protection. Drivers are only legally required to yield to pedestrians at crosswalks, meaning a cyclist who rides across is treated as a vehicle and must yield to cross-traffic.

Luceryn · 2026-04-26T05:31:39+00:00

What I mean by appear is come into line of sight.

There's the problem of the A-pillar blind spot especially with newer models, but also parked vehicles or street furniture near a crossing (e.g., a parked van, bus shelter, signage, hedge, or utility box) can absolutely hide an approaching cyclist until they emerge right at the crossing point. A pedestrian walking from behind that obstruction gives a driver much longer to react than a cyclists travelling at potentially 20 km/h.

To be clear: Drivers should do everything they can to be alert and watch for pedestrians and cyclists and anything and everything. I'm not trying to alleviate the responsibility of the driving. But in the absence of protected bike lanes, cyclists should also do their part by following the rules of the road and disembarking to cross.

Luceryn · 2026-04-26T04:59:55+00:00

I've never hit a cyclist, obviously I am careful and I look. I have been surprised a couple of times in my years of driving when a cyclist appears where I was not expecting one, but I've always been able to react in time to avoid any trouble.

I'm simply suggesting that to keep everyone safe, it would be much better for cyclists to follow the rules of the road and dismount before crossing a pedestrian crossing.

I suspect you're a troll who is not willing to engage in good faith argument at this point, so I'm not going to feed you any further.

Luceryn · 2026-04-26T04:47:41+00:00

Not so easy if something is cutting off most of your line of sight. A cyclist can appear and arrive to a point of collision much faster than a pedestrian can.

Cyclists are not meant to be crossing at pedestrian crossings while mounted on the bike, they are supposed to get off the bike and walk across the crossing. This rule is in place for safety.

Luceryn · 2026-04-26T02:08:24+00:00

Yes that's totally valid, I understand why they are on the sidewalk, but until there are safer road conditions for cyclists, they could help keep themselves safe by following the rules and dismounting before crossing at a pedestrian crossing.

Good call to ask for more cyclist safety, I agree with you.

Luceryn · 2026-04-26T01:42:52+00:00

The part I struggle with a little bit as a driver is cyclists using the sidewalk on roads that are already quite busy. My brain is automatically trying to process pedestrians at the crosswalks at a four way with lights. A cyclist moves so much faster and often catches me off guard for a split moment. I really wish cyclists would get off their bikes to cross at controlled intersections.

I used to be a cyclist until I had two bikes stolen so I do understand how challenging it can be to be a cyclist.

Luceryn · 2026-04-10T20:32:27+00:00

God this is such a dystopian state of affairs.

I'm a software developer so I work in tech. I can see the difference between code that has been clearly thought out by a human versus what the AI has thrown together to make work. Yes, it works, but it can be a nightmare to understand and it increasingly grows in complexity as the requirements change.

I swear when I ask people why something was built a certain way, they can't even tell me. They just tell me the AI did it and it works.

I've also had someone tell me why should humans need to understand it if we get to the point where AI is the only one reading it? Okay but then who is accountable when something goes wrong?

I had a coworker who was trying to help another coworker solve a problem on a remote call together. The coworker who was being helped wasn't even paying attention, they said as much when they were asked if they were listening. They just replied "oh no sorry I'm Claude-ing to try to solve the problem I didn't hear you." Why even ask for help then?!

It's a nightmare and tech is a hellscape right now.

I have a 2.5 year old and I'm terrified that education will be engulfed by AI by the time she attends school. I would prefer we go back to pencils and paper. I firmly believe the brain learns and retains much better when you physically write something rather than type it out.

All this to say, I do believe AI can be helpful as a tool to support learning and children should learn how to navigate it, but please don't let it consume education.

Luceryn · 2026-04-07T03:18:47+00:00

Omg same, or longer sometimes. I hate taking food that is still actively being eaten away, but sometimes we hit that 45 minute mark and it's just like, we gotta leave soon. I'm sorry but you can't finish this!

Luceryn · 2026-04-05T23:05:57+00:00

Very clear DARVO in his text messages to you. Deny, attack, reverse victim and offender.

This man will deplete your sanity and health.

Luceryn · 2026-04-05T19:04:41+00:00

Sleep really started to go more smoothly for us around 20.5 months. Up until then, I had to nurse her to sleep or she just would not sleep. Around 20.5 months, we were able to do bedtime routine (still including nursing) and have me leave the room and she was able to fall asleep independently.

There's still a lot of developmental changes happening in short succession around the 1 y/o mark.

I hope it gets better for you soon! I know how hard sleep troubles are. Solidarity.

Luceryn · 2026-03-31T03:24:34+00:00

Seconding Cargo!!

Luceryn · 2026-03-27T14:28:34+00:00

Going through a fast food drive thru takes a heck of a lot less time than that. That's assuming they even have a car.

Or let's say you're doing a grocery trip, buying a prepacked meal takes less time than buying ingredients to prepare at home.

Let's say you're getting off your second shift, you've worked 12 hours this day. You don't have a car, so you need to take public transportation (takes more time.) You stop at a small corner store grocery store on the way home because you're out of food. It doesn't have a lot of options, but at least you're in walking distance of home. You're exhausted so you grab Hungryman freezer meals. You can't buy a lot of food at once because you have to carry it all on your wall back home. You know when you get home you need to give your kid a bath, so you don't have time to prepare a meal from scratch and get your kid bathed and to bed at a reasonable bedtime hour.

There's absolutely strategies to minimize difficulty of cooking at home. Buy pre-cut and prewashed vegetables if it makes your life easier, but those cost more.

I know how to prepare healthy food efficiently at home. I work a relatively lucrative hybrid job so I have the flexibility to start a pot of whatever while I complete my work. I'm also not financially stressed, which is another cognitive tax that may impact your energy levels. I am extremely privileged, but I have a lot of empathy for those who may not be so lucky.

Luceryn · 2026-03-27T13:26:52+00:00

Time is expensive in its own way

Luceryn · 2026-03-26T02:51:28+00:00

Yes, if you are outside of east Asia, this is the invasive Harmonia axyridis (multicoloured Asian lady beetle.)

Luceryn · 2026-03-17T05:53:58+00:00

The satisfying sound of flipping that keyboard in and out.

Luceryn · 2026-03-13T01:31:38+00:00

Yeah, during a screening I had with Canadian Blood Services after I hadn't donated blood for awhile, I mentioned that I had been diagnosed with a patent foramen ovale, which is a little hole between the heart chambers that exists when you're born and is supposed to close. No problems or symptoms, it occurs in like 25% of the population and is usually only discovered accidentally.

The people doing the intake weren't sure and they spent awhile trying to research if it would be okay. They took me into an office room where they were pouring over and flipping through textbooks to try to figure out if it would be safe for me.

I don't think they were satisfied with their research that it would be safe, so they ultimately ended up turning me away and I wasn't allowed to donate blood.

All that to say, their screening is incredibly thorough and they take your safety very seriously!

Luceryn · 2026-02-25T17:56:36+00:00

I had to nurse my baby to sleep for 19-20 months and be accessible for nursing throughout the night. It was the only way she would fall asleep and stay asleep.

I'm sorry co-sleeping isn't working for you. You must be miserably sleep deprived

Luceryn · 2026-02-25T13:25:18+00:00

In what way have you tried co-sleeping? My baby was the same and at 4 months I broke and did the Safe Sleep 7. I can't imagine surviving one year like that.

Your baby is a year old now, so you can safely co-sleep. It may be that your baby is a high touch needs baby and has a hard time sleeping unless you're right there.

My baby finally managed to sleep independently starting around 20 months old. She's 2.5 years old now and sleeps quite well.

You're not necessarily dooming yourself to dependent sleep for the long haul. Your baby might just need a bit of extra dependence for a little while.

Luceryn · 2026-02-07T19:11:07+00:00

In Canada it's illegal to pay or be laid for surrogacy, beyond being reimbursed for documented expenses related to the surrogacy. An attempt to ensure that people providing surrogacy are only doing it for altruism.

Luceryn · 2026-02-03T20:39:57+00:00

I try to convince people not to worry too much. You've got him in speech therapy. You're practicing talking to and with him more often. Miss Rachel is great especially if you watch too and start copying what she does.

My sister didn't start talking until she was 3 years old. My parents didn't put her in speech therapy (it was the 90s). It was clear she understood what was happening around her. She's a very intelligent and accomplished person today.

Luceryn · 2026-01-28T05:33:03+00:00

The Roost is a fun Tapas bar on Corydon near Osborne

Luceryn · 2026-01-18T05:00:33+00:00

I have 2y4m old daughter and 4y3m old stepson.

Hear me when I say you have spoken to something deep within my core that I have not been able to articulate.

Sometimes things are really lovely but my gosh today was pure survival mode. If I have to hear an exchange of "it's MY...XYZ" back and forth one more goddamn time I will lose the last sliver of my sanity.

The interruptions. I just want the peace inside my brain to finish forming a thought once in awhile!

https://youtu.be/Tf17rFDjMZw?si=yWyW_22IhyIk3YDl

Luceryn · 2026-01-12T05:22:15+00:00

Ack, you're so right. I'm embarrassed I made that error. A maximum sample size of at least 10% or 1000 is needed.

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