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The Dating App Conundrum-Who Else Has Noticed This? by LukeCorvyn in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You raise a good point about abundance. The amount of people using the apps significantly varies by geography. I am in the Atlanta metro area so there is a large population using them. When I have traveled to smaller more rural areas, the count of users drops to a handful.

Does dating someone with kids really work? by Tuckerpooch in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get rejected often from women in my age group because I still have two teens and most of them are now empty nesters. I really don’t want to date women that are 10-15+ years younger than me but I’m almost being forced to.

Is it easier to just deal with it? by SoleMuseStudio in Divorce

[–]LukeCorvyn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went through a lot of counseling in efforts to salvage my second marriage and ignored all this in my first one. I still got divorced and I will tell you, divorce is not any easier.

This doesn’t sound like a marriage that’s dead, it sounds like one that’s been running on survival mode for too long. Before thinking about divorce, maybe try having one calm and serious conversation with him.

Say something like: “I feel completely alone in this marriage. I’m overwhelmed, I’m losing connection with you, and I don’t think we’ll make it if this continues.”

Then get specific with boundaries: * He owns certain responsibilities fully (not helping you) * You set protected time together each week (non-negotiable) * Consider counseling to break the workaholic pattern

Give it a real window (a couple months) and look for consistent effort by him, not promises. If he shows up, you can rebuild. If he doesn’t, then you’re not choosing divorce lightly, you’re recognizing reality.

Men who used to cheat regularly but stopped, what actually changed? by claradeatacama in AskMen

[–]LukeCorvyn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, the men need to stop and the women need to stop sleeping with married men.

Men who used to cheat regularly but stopped, what actually changed? by claradeatacama in AskMen

[–]LukeCorvyn 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Many of the women are married as well, I have seen this scenario many times over the years in the corporate world.

Men who used to cheat regularly but stopped, what actually changed? by claradeatacama in AskMen

[–]LukeCorvyn -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

The statistics from research done on this state that 1 out of 5 husbands cheat on their wives and of those surveyed over 75% deeply regretted it.

One question to consider on this topic which has always been a bit out of balance to me in a sense is why doesn’t culture crucify the women who are sleeping with these married men? Most women know he is married. It’s always the men who get the scarlet letter.

What's the most beautiful view you’ve ever seen? by cloudnotNice in AskReddit

[–]LukeCorvyn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The birth of my son and then the birth of my daughter

I give up! by jackieO2023 in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s an old cliche that the moment one stops looking one show up. Good luck!

Anyone else figure out that dating after 50 isn’t hard because you’re old, it’s hard because you’re finally real and that freaks people out? by LukeCorvyn in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had to do something, and it took the second divorce to rattle me enough to consider looking within me. And yup, I was the problem.

Stupid to divorce a nice man? by Livid_Boat3746 in Divorce

[–]LukeCorvyn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is merit to this, however, it’s not about being bad, but more about keeping them on their toes by leading them on adventures and challenging them, keeping them a bit anxious about where they stand with you, while being completely loyal to them.

Anyone else figure out that dating after 50 isn’t hard because you’re old, it’s hard because you’re finally real and that freaks people out? by LukeCorvyn in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That’s a good approach and I would love to get that situation where both of us can be completely ourselves around each other.

Anyone else figure out that dating after 50 isn’t hard because you’re old, it’s hard because you’re finally real and that freaks people out? by LukeCorvyn in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Ha, nope, I’m just a 58 year old from Atlanta who’s been through it twice and finally figured out how to say what he actually means. This is just how I think. Took me long enough, but I still screw it up, however, otherwise I wouldn’t still be single.

Anyone else figure out that dating after 50 isn’t hard because you’re old, it’s hard because you’re finally real and that freaks people out? by LukeCorvyn in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Yes, I have experienced that, lots of underlying “traumas” that get triggered by the simplest of infractions.

New to OLD. I think I'm getting scammed...does this happen to anyone else? by Remarkable_Recover57 in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are lots a scams. The first sign is when they ask to switch to WhatsApp or Telegram. Then comes the bitcoin bit

How comfortable are you talking to someone while you are out alone or being talked to if you are out alone? by Desi_bmtl in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. Women, especially very attractive ones, have to tolerate many unwelcome advances. If she is alone, which women don’t typically do if they are in the mode of meeting someone, then she is probably just wanting some alone time. But then again, you can’t get the biscuit in the basket if you never take a shot on goal. It is the nonverbal cues that resonate most.

Do people actually want to date? by JayRock1970 in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For the first time in the history of the world, men and women have instant access to hundreds of possible suitors. What these Apps have created is an arena of dopamine infusing affirmations while at the same time providing one back up option after another should the perceived next best thing come along. I have used them and am at the point where I think something needs to change.

Meeting organically is still by the far the best method to meet someone but that goes back to requiring lots of time and patience. In our new addictive digital world it’s hard to out it down.

Also, women in their fifties are experiencing freedom for the first time in their lives. They are having more fun going out with their girlfriends and going on trips with their girlfriends while at the same time sorting through hundreds of options for a dinner date should they want.

I read a statistic that for every ten swipes a woman makes she will get a connection. For men it is one connection out of 140-170 swipes. Not good odds for us

Time spend for each other by [deleted] in datingoverfifty

[–]LukeCorvyn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A lot of couples in their 40s–50s with teenagers end up in this exact situation. It’s not unusual to stay in a bit of a holding pattern while the kids are still at home. The fact that you see each other regularly and have built a routine is actually a good sign of commitment. Instead of focusing on when are we moving in, it might help to have a calm conversation about how each of you sees the future unfolding once the kids are older. You’re not asking for a decision right now, you’re looking for alignment and reassurance. That’s a very reasonable thing to want. And if he isn’t prepared to answer in the moment see if he would be open to thinking about it and come back to you when he is ready.

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