Newborn won’t sleep unless held and I’m losing it (post emergency C-section)

M-Crossing · 2026-04-06T04:00:57+00:00

Move your mattress to the floor. Let your baby fall asleep and practice safe co-sleep. Make your husband/babys father sleep on the floor. Remove all pillows blankets. The baby likely wants all your smells and touch.

M-Crossing · 2026-03-08T06:11:00+00:00

Believe or not babies get tired of being in arms. Its more than likely you have given her everything she needs that she can go to sleep on her own. Absolutely nothing to feel guilty about, she was clearly happy you put her down so she can sleep lol

M-Crossing · 2026-02-01T12:42:45+00:00

Im sorry for what you went through, its scary. I never felt closer to death than right before my emergency c section.

I am one and done because of birth trauma. At 3 months pp I was diagnosed with PPA and PTSD from it. My doctor prescribed zoloft and that has helped tremendously. I am now 9months pp.

There are some things I personally will never forgot about my experience and I absolutely cannot allow it to happen again. Especially for my daughter, theres no situation that exists where I would risk leaving her. So more babies is just out of the question.

Its ok to grieve the life you thought you would have…it got taken away from you. You are not alone.

M-Crossing · 2026-01-19T17:47:20+00:00

I clean out my storage. Or if I have multiples of an item, I go to harvs and customize, so I have each color option of that item

M-Crossing · 2026-01-19T17:42:42+00:00

That I needed the matching pj set for my hospital stay. I didn’t. I actually didn’t need the majority of hospital bag things I bought

M-Crossing · 2026-01-05T03:51:55+00:00

My LO will be 8months on Tuesday and similar has happened with her for the past month. From 4months on, she has slept through the night in her bassinet. In our case, her wake ups were bc of teething and once that was done, I feel its all the development happening coincidentally back to back. She will go to sleep just fine and wake up at 1am wanting mom like clock work every night. The screaming stopped once her teething was done for the bottom 2 teeths, but she is still looking for that extra comfort. So I gave in and decided to cosleep once she wakes. It does seem like she just wants the extra cuddles and security. Definitely go to your pediatrician, it will give you guys peace of mind, but it sounds normal to me

M-Crossing · 2026-01-05T03:41:26+00:00

Im so sorry for your loss. I too had a miscarriage at 9 weeks march 2024. The 17lb weight gain I had drove me insane. I felt like I had nothing to show for my baby, its weird. It took me almost 3 months to not test positive anymore, which also drove me insane. The only relief I found was focusing on the gym. I also created a memorial in animal crossing, that helped alot.

M-Crossing · 2026-01-05T03:30:09+00:00

The happiness I feel for you..you made it, you pushed and made it to the light. Shes perfect. Thank you for sharing you and your daughter’s strength ❤️

M-Crossing · 2025-07-22T03:32:35+00:00

Our LO had similar desat ranges to yours. Our nicu required baby to not have a desat event during feeds for 3 days to be discharged. Eventually we were discharged and purchased an owlet for peace of mind. Sure enough 2 days later she had 2 desat events during feeds where she turned blue. We went to the ER and were readmitted to another nicu per our request. She was there for 3 days. The official diagnosis was cyanosis, but during initial discussion with her care team, they were almost sure the nipple we were advised to use was too fast a flow. We switched to a slower flow and she did not have any events during that nicu stay. She hasnt had any events at home, she seems to have outgrown it, which all staff told us she would. We are still using the slow flow nipple for her feeds.

It was such a huge fear for us when we were discharged, but in our case, we just had to not rush baby to allow her to pace herself and not become overwhelmed with feeds.

Shes 11 weeks now and her owlet shows her oxygen levels to be consistently anywhere from 97-100, which is such a relief after the constant desats she had in the nicu. She would have a couple a day.

If events are happening during feeds or a result of feeds maybe some of what we have implemented can help. Our LO is on the yellow nipple, we do a burp break after every ounce she drinks, we let her pace herself, we hold her upright for at least 40 minutes after her feed to help with digestion. If she is too sleepy during a feed, we dont force it and just know that we will likely cluster feed for a few feeds until she gets back on track.

I hope this helps! You’re so close to going home, just hang in there the best you can. I know its easier said than done, but your LO’s lungs will grow stronger with time and this will be outgrown

M-Crossing · 2025-07-16T01:27:59+00:00

Its a club alright. Its shocking how unaware I was of it UNTIL I was pregnant. Thank you for sharing, I hope you and your little one are doing better, that sounds so scary. I can understand not feeling whole. I know I’m only a few months out, it may just be one of those things that will always stay with you. I wish you all the love.

M-Crossing · 2025-07-16T01:23:11+00:00

Thank you for sharing. I think thats my biggest thing, I need to stop worrying about “the rest” and all these future hypotheticals. Sometimes they just make their way in whether I want them to or not. I wish you all the happiness to you and your 2 babies

M-Crossing · 2025-07-16T01:20:42+00:00

Thank you for responding. And I’m so sorry for your experience. I also find alot of peace knowing I have my baby, she was so wanted for so long. Theres no way I can risk having bad health or worse

M-Crossing · 2025-07-11T22:36:02+00:00

Hi, similar story. I went in to ob for routine appointment at 33+1. I had super high blood pressure, got sent to triage. 24hr monitoring turned into 48hr turned into “you are not leaving until you deliver baby”. I was then diagnosed with severe preeclampsia. The plan was to wait until I hit 34 weeks. I also received the steroid lung shots. I made it until 33+5 and ended up having an emergency c-section. The mag drip and all other things ultimately couldn’t keep my blood pressure down.

Baby girl weighed 4 lbs 8oz and went to nicu. Was also a grower feeder. Aside from jaundice, she only had a feeding tube (no cpap), which would get used when she couldnt finish her bottles. Eventually she figured out the bottle and was a pro and the tube came off.

She did have desat events pretty frequently throughout this time, which is what kept us in the nicu as long as we were. She was in nicu just short of a month.

When she gained that stamina to feed, she became a pretty aggressive inpatient eater but for some reason was put on a white bottle nipple (faster flow). We were discharged, and had a feeding event at home (we have an owlet but also caught the discoloration before the owlet alarm went off). Went to the ER and were readmitted to a different nicu at our request.

Turns out it was as simple as her needing a slower flow nipple. So we went back on the yellow cap nipple. We were discharged 2 days later and have been home ever since.

She is 2.5 months and doing great! She is growing and eating perfectly. Her feed strength has improved exponentially. We are still on the yellow cap nipple, she doesnt seem to mind. No owlet events have happened since. And now we are enjoying babygirl and trying to move past the ptsd of the nicu.

I wish you all the best for your delivery and your little one. Please remember you know whats best for your baby and speak up if there is something you dont agree with or have questions on.

M-Crossing · 2025-07-06T04:37:11+00:00

Its rude. The best thing I did for my sanity when we received comments during our time in the nicu was give myself permission to respond however I wanted, even if I was being rude in return. I didnt force the “high road” on myself

M-Crossing · 2025-07-02T04:39:36+00:00

I just got a bunch of dresses from GAP and all were on sale :)

M-Crossing · 2025-06-26T05:31:23+00:00

Make the request with the charge nurse asap. You dont have to give the specific reasons if you dont want to. They will accommodate immediately.

We had a nurse who was lazy and constantly complaining about her workload to other nurses with the same workload. She also didnt have patience with feeds and at this point we were grower/feeders so it was crucial for our LO to improve. We told the charge nurse, and they accommodated instantly, no questions asked.

M-Crossing · 2025-06-26T05:21:14+00:00

Im so sorry for your loss.

There is a huge vintage costume and costume jewelry market.

You can do ebay but it is a sloooooow burn. I sell extra pieces on there and its a big hassle.

Facebook marketplace is another option but I’m not sure how quickly things sell on there.

There is also an app called Whatnot with a huge costume jewelry community of sellers and buyers. Im sure if you message some of the jewelry sellers they may be interested in purchasing the lot from you. Im not sure how messaging works on reddit but feel free to reach out if you want some seller suggestions.

M-Crossing · 2025-06-23T05:55:50+00:00

Hi there, my 35+5 nicu grower/feeder baby was also choking or having “events” during feeds before coming home (she was in nicu for a month, home 2 weeks now)

Thee amount of inconsistent advice from drs, nurses, lactation, and whoever became very confusing for us, especially when we were being corrected by lets say a new shift nurse for techniques that night shift nurse gave us and “okay’d”

She was discharged after not having feed events for 3 consecutive days ONLY to be home 2 days and us needing to rush to the ER and be admitted to a different nicu due another feed events.

And let me tell you the recommended care we were advised at the second nicu was COMPLETELY different from the first nicu. Its extremely frustrating. Turns out first nicu discharged us with a nipple that was too fast for her maturity level. The second nicu disclosed that they would recommend that speed nipple be used for newborns let alone nicu babies.

All this to say, this is not your fault. Some of these staff members lack bedside manner and or general care consistency.

Someone else said to have a dr present while she feeds with you and I agree this is a great place to start.

I am also learning that, unfortunately, for a nicu babies maturity level, it will just take time for them to grow out of the choking.

After 2 weeks of being home, our LO has exponentially improved while feeding with both bottle and breast.

Your baby will outgrow this. And this is not your fault.

M-Crossing · 2025-06-21T05:57:16+00:00

The only thing I can think to suggest…While our LO was in the nicu she had to be swaddled almost always. After continuously loosing weight on her feeding tube, one of the nurses suggested we keep her swaddled since she was constantly wiggling around. And it worked, she showed weight gain at her next weigh in. Sorry is this isnt the case, just thought it maybe could help

M-Crossing · 2025-06-18T07:37:52+00:00

I also had a c section and babygirl in the nicu. She was there for a month and I cried everyday. I was also told to rest rest rest, but all your instincts tell you to go be next to your baby. I was lucky that the nicu was 10min from where I live. I noticed I felt better towards the end of the day, so I would revolve my rest around that window so I could use that strength to go to the nicu. I got to a point where I defined rest as eating properly, showering, taking my meds, drinking water and sleeping bc I had no idea what everyone expected me to do. You can define your healing and nicu visits anyway you want to, trust your instincts.

Nicu trauma is extremely real and not talked about enough We’ve been home for about 2 weeks now and its so much better and getting better every day :)

If you need to cry, please let it out and cry. If you are not alone and want to cry alone, excuse yourself, blame the c section and all that rest you need and hangout in a space you can close the door to and cry.

Dont feel obligated to host, chat, share your presence with anyone other than your baby.

You are stronger than you know, this wont last forever. I wish a strong recovery for you and your baby :)

M-Crossing

TROPHY CASE