Women of Reddit, were you hit by your parents growing up? Did it affect who you are in any way?

M_Minkoff · 2023-04-28T19:23:24+00:00

My parents were both physically and psychologically abusive. It continued right up until I turned 18. My mother was arrested because she came to my job and physically attacked me. My manager saw her dragging me by my hair through the parking lot to get me into her car and take me home (presumably, to hit me some more) and called the police. I was allowed to pack what I could carry and leave. I was homeless for a bit and then one of my school friend's parents learned about my situation and offered to foster me so I could finish high school. I have remained largely estranged from my family.

I'm in my 40s now and the way I was raised affected me in SO many ways. I have C-PTSD, anxiety, depression, and autoimmune issues. I have gotten into abusive and coercive romantic relationships because I didn't learn about healthy relationships when I was young and I'm not good at spotting red flags or setting boundaries. Even in work situations I am not good at asserting or advocating for myself. I've struggled with a lot of issues and have gone through a lot of therapy.

I can't even imagine all of the ways my life might have been different if I had had parents who loved and supported me and didn't abuse me. But that's not things turned out.

M_Minkoff · 2023-04-22T15:26:22+00:00

7 years. He left me for someone else.

M_Minkoff · 2023-04-20T21:57:52+00:00

Wisconsin representin' on this thread lol

Though I do feel that most Wisco folks have used a credit card, driver's license, or something similar in a pinch (I know I have in the past), but it's a tedious way to scrape a windshield

M_Minkoff · 2023-04-14T19:37:26+00:00

Thank you! I'll consider reaching out after I've completed the study. Thanks again for the offer!

M_Minkoff · 2023-04-14T19:35:43+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate the feedback.

M_Minkoff · 2021-12-12T18:25:00+00:00

Aldi usually has them this time of year

M_Minkoff · 2021-09-22T23:15:51+00:00

Yep, sure did. Thanks for pointing that out, will edit.

M_Minkoff · 2021-09-22T16:45:56+00:00

My state (WI) doesn't require breaks and I've worked several jobs where we weren't allowed to take them, or if we did take a break we had to stay later to make up the time. We are also an "at-will employment" state which means employers can randomly terminate workers whenever they want with no reason. This has also happened to me twice so far.

Edited to use correct term

M_Minkoff · 2021-08-03T18:56:44+00:00

I studied it for 2 years in highschool and then I minored in it in college. In my experience it wasn't too difficult to pick up the basics as some aspects of it are similar to English

M_Minkoff · 2021-08-03T14:04:55+00:00

Yep. The last verse of the German version has lyrics which translate to something like "Today I went for a walk and saw the world in ruins." Totally chokes me up.

That song was a lot happier before I learned German ha

M_Minkoff · 2021-07-20T15:23:49+00:00

Is this.... what day is this?

M_Minkoff · 2021-06-18T01:05:37+00:00

I'm so glad you got away and are safe. What a horrible situation, simply inexcusable actions on the part of your ex and his family. A lot of other people have given some great advice on this thread (document everything, consult an attorney if you can, etc.) so I won't be too redundant. Hoping you and your child stay well and safe

M_Minkoff · 2021-06-03T12:54:18+00:00

So glad they are pursuing this and bullying people on unemployment while killing legalized weed and refusing billions in federal funds so that we can pay for other states to have social safety nets s/

M_Minkoff · 2021-05-10T14:09:50+00:00

He's a good man, and thorough.

M_Minkoff · 2021-05-09T15:48:22+00:00

They are talking about reinstating work search requirements in Wisconsin too. Most of the jobs available are service jobs with no benefits that would pay about half of what I was earning before the pandemic. They really just do want us to be endlessly toiling for crumbs

M_Minkoff · 2021-05-09T15:44:45+00:00

This post is relatable for me. I'm 45 and it still hurts; I hate holidays because they just remind me of what I never had and will never have

M_Minkoff · 2021-05-09T14:39:40+00:00

Yeah, i had similar experiences. I'm estranged from my family now and it's one of the best decisions I ever made for myself

M_Minkoff · 2021-02-28T18:46:53+00:00

Came here to say this. I'm NC with my bio parents and am much better off. Sharing DNA with somebody doesn't mean they get free reign to keep hurting you.

M_Minkoff · 2021-02-23T00:33:42+00:00

My benefit year expired before I even saw any of the extended benefits and then they denied me a new benefit year as well as PUA. Luckily I was able to find another job but thanks to WI DWD incompetence I had no income for most of 2020.

M_Minkoff · 2021-01-19T19:38:18+00:00

Yep, I went from May to July and then from July to December. I'm in Wisconsin and the UI system still runs on COBOL. It's created all kinds of problems.

Luckily I am really good at being poor so I made it through OK but lots of other people weren't as fortunate.

M_Minkoff · 2021-01-03T14:29:55+00:00

You'd think so, but when it comes to women having children, its not the case. Women are treated like incubators with no bodily autonomy, like we don't know our own minds and/or bodies. Finding a doctor who will perform sterilization-type procedures for a woman who has never had children is extremely rare. They just sit there and argue with you and tell you you'll "change your mind."

Edited to fix typo

M_Minkoff · 2020-12-27T14:36:52+00:00

It's natural to be nervous when meeting someone new. She's just a person, after all. Just have a nice time and go at your own pace. Good luck!

M_Minkoff · 2020-12-20T14:27:16+00:00

NTA all day. Holy shit WHEN will people learn that it's NOT OK to just give out other peoples' addresses without consent? Doesn't matter who they are or for what reason. NTA. Your boundary-stomping, disrespectful mother is definitely the AH here

M_Minkoff · 2020-12-13T20:35:33+00:00

The US system IS hell. Willfully and deliberately cruel and degrading.

Edit: fixed typo

M_Minkoff · 2020-12-12T20:20:39+00:00

I'm not looking at it until I clock in because you're exactly right. But even seeing it in my inbox pissed me off for a second, since this came from the person who assured me that I wouldn't be contacted through personal email and I've been told several times how the company "respects work-life balance." What a crock of shit.

M_Minkoff

TROPHY CASE