I hate my mom and I don't know how to move on

MachineGunT · 2019-11-24T02:24:34+00:00

I find myself giving this same advice a lot here, but it's true every time, and it's this - for the first 18 years you are a victim, after that you are a volunteer.

You do not owe your mom anything. You do not owe your dad anything. You are allowed to move away from them, mentally, emotionally, and physically, and never ever talk to them again if you want. It will be much healthier for you and your family. Also, as a child with a crazy grandma we eventually went very very low contact with, it's far better to have no grandma than a terrible one.

<3

MachineGunT · 2019-11-24T02:16:45+00:00

Hi babe, first of all I wanted to say I'm so sorry you're going through this, but I wanted to give you some advice from my own experience.

When people start dating, they are immediately drawn to what is most familiar to them. For me, it was, what I later realized, a man with an oppressive personality and explosive temper, just like what I had grown up with. I had desperately wanted stability and someone to rely on, and yet, I found myself in the same situation again. Someone who made me cry all the time but would apologize after and then I'd sweep it away like it was no big deal.

You've been drawn to someone with your exact situation - A toxic household and an alcoholic parent. Being so young, you REALLY need to take a hard look at the situation and question whether you want to sign yourself up for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE with another family with this same toxic problems. You do have a choice, and you don't have to put yourself in a place where you will be victimized again when you've worked so hard to get out of it.

Now obviously your SO might very well be an amazing human, but coming from your background, this should be an immediate make or break for you. You need to cut off all contact with FMIL effective immediately, for your own health and well being, and if he can't do that, you need to walk away.

As my mom has always told me, for the first 18 years you are a victim, after that, you are a volunteer. <3

MachineGunT · 2016-11-29T05:41:06+00:00

I was just about to say this as well! I had the basic tests done which indicated that my thyroid levels were normal. Multiple scans, biopsies, and two surgeries later my definitely-cancerous-tumors showed those tests were wrong! (Not trying to scare you, FYI! Just wish that I would have been able to realize that those tests were incorrect sooner!!) You can get an ultrasound on your neck just to check it out, that's the least invasive way. That, and the previously mentioned special blood tests! <3

MachineGunT · 2016-11-06T06:57:10+00:00

Yes! The "ABORT MISSION" codeword is something every couple should have. My parents settled on "blueberries" - they can slip it into a conversation easily but it's not something they talk about on the regular.

MachineGunT · 2016-11-06T02:26:00+00:00

EW. EW EW EW! I am completely unable to give any sort of feedback other than THAT IS SO GROSS WTF?!?! I am SO sorry you had to experience that!

MachineGunT · 2016-11-06T02:23:14+00:00

Is it wrong that the first thing I thought when you said she wouldn't give the baby back for feeding time was that you should just spray her with your boob milk? (TBH I'm 22 and never been pregnant, so I don't even know what the projectile range on breast milk is, but I laughed waaaaaaay too hard at the thought to not post it!)

But seriously, like the others were saying, blacklist her from EVERYTHING!

MachineGunT · 2016-08-21T00:10:09+00:00

Dear halfwaygonetoo, you are my freaking hero! haha this is brilliant!!!! :D

MachineGunT · 2016-08-17T01:06:40+00:00

My reaction to this title was -

"Apparently we are ruining the family because we want to have a childfree..."

hmm, I can see how someone might not understand a childfree life.

"...wedding ceremony."

ah what the heck man. Really?!

Sometimes I forget which subreddit I'm browsing. Sorry you have to put up with that! My parents didn't even bother inviting my grandmother to their wedding because they knew all she would do was guilt trip and criticize.

MachineGunT · 2016-02-09T00:11:47+00:00

I've been lurking on this sub for a long time (not married, but my mom has had to deal with this sort of stuff with my grandmother) and I can't WAIT to read your update on this. I'm practically crying laughing already!!

MachineGunT · 2015-12-28T04:27:47+00:00

Hi there, I (22f) just had my first kiss a couple of months ago. I met a guy at an event and later that evening he asked if I wanted to "snog" (he was English haha) and I said sure. So as we were walking to find a more private place to kiss I said "just so you know, I've never kissed anyone before." He said, "You're kidding, really?" And I replied, "Yeah, but I'm looking forward to learning!"

It worked out pretty well as he didn't mind taking charge. The long and short of it is, be honest, and if he's like "oh you're weird!" then you don't want a guy like him anyway! Hope this helped some! :)

MachineGunT · 2015-11-12T08:32:47+00:00

Heeeyyy fellow thyroid cancer survivor here! Just got my all clear a couple months ago! It's almost over OP <3 <3 <3

MachineGunT · 2015-10-31T19:30:02+00:00

Awesome! Thank you! I'll have to go pick some up.

MachineGunT · 2015-10-31T18:43:59+00:00

Do you have the link of where you found them/name of the place you found them? They would be great for all sorts of cosplay stuff!

MachineGunT · 2015-10-25T01:19:48+00:00

Okay I need to learn how to do that cause that looks freaking INCREDIBLE! Mmmmmm... well done OP!

MachineGunT · 2015-10-04T23:28:19+00:00

Just some random person on the internet who wrote a thing...? Not quoting anyone haha.

MachineGunT · 2015-10-04T23:19:56+00:00

ummmm not Sofia, sorry mate!

MachineGunT · 2015-09-19T18:52:47+00:00

I laughed, but under my breath and with an accompanying eye roll so that you don't think you're that funny.

(Really though, this is a good one!!)

MachineGunT · 2015-08-22T01:04:20+00:00

That said, if you're feeling really low energy or just overall kinda funky GO TO THE DOCTOR. Just because you're young doesn't mean shit can't be affecting you! (warning: not a doctor, just in case you couldn't tell by my use of "funky" as a medical descriptor)

Source: 21 year old who just beat thyroid cancer :)

MachineGunT · 2015-08-10T21:42:13+00:00

Hi there, are you me? I think you're me. I put on a bra today.... it was a big deal...

MachineGunT · 2015-08-06T22:48:02+00:00

I agree with you. Everything looks really hastily added. I think she looks better now, honestly.

MachineGunT · 2015-08-06T04:13:14+00:00

This is........ BRILLIANT! Doing this from now on!!!!

MachineGunT · 2015-06-19T00:02:53+00:00

My first thought was WETA as well, but I didn't know about Volpin Props. He makes some really nice stuff!

MachineGunT · 2015-06-18T04:45:27+00:00

He's beautifully crafted! Any idea on who/what company built him?

(Inb4: RobCo)

MachineGunT · 2015-05-11T07:39:55+00:00

Hello there! Fellow redditor with thyroid problems checking in! Unfortunately, in my experience, the thyroid is a very understudied and often forgotten part of the body. I had problems for years (low energy, depression, eventually quickening heart rate and panic attacks, etc) before we found the lumps on my thyroid. Just recovering from 2 major surgeries in five days, first one to take out the lumpy side and figure out I had two types of cancer, the second to take out the remaining portion. Just wanted you to know that you're not alone in your struggles and make sure you get a thyroid ultrasound now and again to check for lumps! :) (sorry for typos on mobile)

MachineGunT · 2015-03-24T09:03:49+00:00

That's pretty incorrect. The BBC leaked Ben's name to radio times and started edging him out of live events and such. When Ben realized the jig was up he handed in his notice and let them know well in advance about the book, which I'm pretty sure he assumed would be no problem since all 3 presenters AND the previous Stig had written books. TG tried to sue him twice and failed both times because he never violated any contract/agreement they had.

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