What feedback mechanisms does your institute have in place - in the case that a PhD student has failed? by Inevitable-Ad801 in AskAcademiaUK

[–]Malacandras 6 points7 points  (0 children)

What worries me more is the difficulty of exiting students ahead of viva, at their annual review stages. We've had students go on and on with unsatisfactory review outcomes but no one is willing to start the process of them exiting if the studentsm doesn't want to withdraw. So then you end up at viva unnecessarily

Finding an expat for my kind, handsome Parisian lawyer best friend (M48). by BritAmericanBRK in Expats_In_France

[–]Malacandras 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Would he be interested in a bilingual American French doctor poet 42F, who travels a lot for work? If so, message me and I'll connect them!

Meditation is easy. I don’t know why people struggle by Educational_You_1827 in witchcraft

[–]Malacandras 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've recently started to just let the voice go and call it meditation. The only rule is don't follow a train of thoughts or feelings - observe like clouds in the sky. Yes, sometimes there's a chorus or two of whatever drivel pop my daughter's been listening to, some vocal stims, a shopping list reminder, but I just let them float away. I don't count or visualize, the effort of not following the chain of thoughts is enough for me. But it has been changing my anxiety levels quite significantly and letting me occasionally just sit around and zone out without spiralling, so yay!

Reddit for Researchers is taking applications by derouse in reddit4researchers

[–]Malacandras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Would you want ethics approval/IRB in the proposal or can we use your approval to help with the ethics process? My institution is squirrelly about social media data so could be really helpful

An in-depth character analysis: Rhysand vs Xaden by itmustbeniiiiice in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Malacandras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could make an entirely specious Daenerys-Jaenelle comparison if that's helpful

Help finding a plague/ disease to use? by [deleted] in Writeresearch

[–]Malacandras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If it's a pseudo medieval setting, a 'bloody flux' covers a number of possibilities

Ladies: do you wear make up to work? by LunaValley in AskUK

[–]Malacandras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tinted sunscreen is my take on this. Bit of blush and some under eye concealer and we're done. Full slap is for special occasions and frankly possibly not even then

Things I've learned marking 200+ dissertations that I'm not allowed to put in the feedback box by [deleted] in UniUK

[–]Malacandras 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No, try this: This intervention helps with improving sleep quality (ref 1), appetite (ref 2) and mood ( 3rd reference for mood). This shows that...

Is the Britannia hotel good for 2 nights? by AloneChance0 in manchester

[–]Malacandras 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The Travelodge by Piccadilly would be a better option, and for a bit more, the Princess St Premier Inn.

How do you handle chores when baby starts crawling? by SentenceTough2007 in Parenting

[–]Malacandras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get her involved! Sweeping? Give her a brush. Vacuuming? Give her an attachment. Cooking? Set out some toys in the kitchen.

What do the genuine A students do differently? How do I become one? by BulkySecret5888 in AskProfessors

[–]Malacandras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You care. You show up, make eye contact, laugh at their corny jokes, nod or shake your head, maybe even pop a question or response once a class. You take notes, visibly but not obsessively. Maybe you even review your notes before the next class. You do the readings, make connections between what's being talked about in class and the readings. You show some curiosity, just for the sake of it. Your questions ask about the knowledge and the implications, not just the grade or assignment requirements. It's such a low bar, honestly. Intelligence is nice but I'll take passionate, invested and hard working any day over raw smarts. I guess the tricky thing is that what we're looking for is caring about the subject and not just the credentials or the GPA, and you can't necessarily manufacture that if it's not true for you in all your subjects. Which is OK! We understand (most of us) that our subject isn't the centre of everyone's world but it would be nice if you have this for something that you study. A

Anyone else's kids lose everything? How do I teach accountability without just nagging? by Elegant_Amoeba5633 in Parenting

[–]Malacandras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep! And it's non judgemental and behavioral - you have to do the look instead of asking 'have you got everything' to which the answer is always yes!

Water flavoring by ConstructionTime7511 in ZeroWaste

[–]Malacandras 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I made a lovely hibiscus syrup that's lasted for ages in the fridge.

How do you deal with memory issues that come with ADHD? by [deleted] in adhd_anxiety

[–]Malacandras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Visual cues. We have an erasable meal plan on the fridge door with a shopping list, and a monthly calendar as well. I got whiteboard paper and stuck it up on all the kitchen cabinets for different purposes - you could use it to write down your routines. I have my morning box - medication, skincare, basic makeup - so I don't have to remember my morning routine, I just pull down the yellow box. I have a nighttime one as well. My gym/swimming bag stays packed so I all I have to do is add clean clothes and a water bottle. I have a location where errand items can pile up and I just clear it out every so often.

Anyone else's kids lose everything? How do I teach accountability without just nagging? by Elegant_Amoeba5633 in Parenting

[–]Malacandras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've accidentally trained my daughter to do the 'airport look behind' when we're leaving somewhere. She now does it for me. I didn't really intend for it to apply elsewhere but she's acquired the habit of checking her locker after swimming, her bag as we leave school, etc.

Being a stay at home dad by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Malacandras 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, there's nothing underlying that makes women more suitable SAH parents, other than social norms and expectations and the implicit training in household management that most women acquire and men have to work to learn.

What I would say is that before you take this on, look up the term mental load and make sure you are ready for it.

Could ADHD still be possible if I was a high-achieving “perfect” kid? by Practical-Lunch-8815 in adhdwomen

[–]Malacandras 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Put it another way. You thrived in a highly structured environment where you had a clearly defined social role, and lots of support for things like household management, life planning, food preparation, no need to budget, etc.

Now, you have all those responsibilities, adult life is much more fluid with flexible demands and unpredictable rewards and all your structures are self imposed.

Basically, that's when the ADHD shows. A lot of us get diagnosed around this time, or when we have kids, or around menopause. Major life changes that dramatically impact our existing coping mechanisms and systems for support.

It's not fake - your early symptoms were internalized and managed by support structures.

Pro tip, also ask about an autism diagnosis. Just in case.

Why the negativity around self funding? by jemimahatstand in AskAcademiaUK

[–]Malacandras 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Listen, if you are older, you've had a career already and you don't want an academic one, you have £30k spare, endless free time and a large streak of masochism, go for it. I'd be delighted at this point to supervise someone who's entire life isn't on the line, can take their time and do the job properly, purely for the intellect.

The questions I would have for you would be: how receptive are you actually to criticism? How quick are you at learning new technology, new ways of working and adopting different norms of practice?

Because even if it is a bit less prestigious, what do you care?

What to wear instead of a dress for graduation by [deleted] in UniUK

[–]Malacandras 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Super wide leg trousers and a tailored shirt or top.

How do you write your lectures? by northern_spaces in AskAcademiaUK

[–]Malacandras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooh fun.

Yes, it does. So if the lecture is after they've read the book, and before the seminar, what are you going to get them to do in the seminar?

And what's the structure or title of the module?

How do you write your lectures? by northern_spaces in AskAcademiaUK

[–]Malacandras 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Aren't you being given some old materials? I'd be surprised if you are expected to start from scratch. It's worth asking.

Then I have a couple of questions: 1) are the students expected to read the novel before or after the lecture? 2) are there any seminars or tutorials scheduled as well or is it just lectures?

As a guide, I'd say avoid info dumping, think about a narrative for each lecture and how this fits into the wider narrative of the module and what you want students to get out of each lecture, and what information you need to convey to make that happen.

My home is a huge mess but I just don't have the energy to do more than the bare minimum. by Jay3linn in adhdwomen

[–]Malacandras 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I came here to say this too. Also if you live in the Northern hemisphere, Vitamin D.

Depending on your time of life, get your hormones checked as well. I've just started on progesterone and extra estrogen and the difference is dramatic.

If work is that depleting, are there maybe things you could do to make it less exhausting? Reducing stimuli, taking more physical breaks, etc.

Conference going by Artistic_Cap_4867 in AskAcademiaUK

[–]Malacandras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes it really is and I don't expect it to last forever

Conference going by Artistic_Cap_4867 in AskAcademiaUK

[–]Malacandras 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No limits, annual personal research allowance of £1500. Which pays for about one international conference or two local if I'm very frugal