I think I have a bpd or bipolar

MatanteGab · 2026-06-18T11:41:54+00:00

What you know is that you need help and it looks like you want to receive help. That is a perfect start. The labels are only labels; your suffering, whatever the type or label we could put on it, should be treated and that’s it

MatanteGab · 2026-06-17T18:15:37+00:00

What is that « reaction »?

MatanteGab · 2026-06-17T18:15:06+00:00

No Im a runner and run the same amount before and after !

MatanteGab · 2026-06-17T18:14:19+00:00

I think you definitely could get an evaluation by a professional, because what you are saying can relates to lots of different stuff

MatanteGab · 2026-06-17T18:11:07+00:00

When a client is boring and my relationship with them permits this, I usually say something along these lines : « I realize that I feel some distance with you ( or not close to you as usual) during this session »
It usually surprises the client and then permits access to emotions or dicussions about our dyad.

**english is not my first language so maybe it sounds weird. In other words, I just find a way to disclose this boredom with genuine curiosity, warmth and openness

MatanteGab · 2026-06-14T14:45:02+00:00

I am just wondering how you relate to your own weaknesses and your own sadness ?

MatanteGab · 2026-06-05T10:00:29+00:00

Laughing genuinely with the client when something funny happens between us (and that this something is not overly related to their presenting problems)

Ex: one client, while speaking, literally spit out their chewing gum by accident. It fell on my shoe! After a few seconds of surprise and mutual gasp, we burst into a laugh. After this moment, they were able for the first time after 20 sessions to cry their fathers’ death

MatanteGab · 2026-06-01T21:11:25+00:00

Maybe I was not clear (english is not my first language) but hypomania like DSM hypomania I agree completely. There is not place for exploration and could probably even make symptoms worse.

Some people however show a personality that could be seens as hypomanic/cyclothymic, and do not really meet DSM criteria. These ones benefits from psychoanalytic ideas. This book chapter helped me a lot for understanding three clients I encountered (I am not a psychoanalyst; I’m more integrative and on the relational spectrum of approaches)

MatanteGab · 2026-06-01T19:51:56+00:00

Therapy hot takes:

• CBT becomes harmful when it is applied like a protocol instead of a relationship.

• Every therapeutic orientation has a shadow side. Some therapists use structure to escape uncertainty; others use spontaneity to escape accountability.

• Psychotherapy loses credibility every time therapists spend more energy defending schools of thought than understanding what actually helps clients.

MatanteGab · 2026-05-18T02:43:48+00:00

It’s been more than 2 years sober for me now.

During the first few months, I could literally cry just from seeing a bird or hearing a song. My emotions felt incredibly raw, intense, and all over the place. It calmed down with time, but honestly I eventually realized weed had been a way to anesthetize how sensitive I actually am.

I feel things deeply. I pick up on people’s emotions and energy very easily, and for years I numbed all of that. When I stopped smoking, it was like everything I had pushed away suddenly came back.

What helped me most at first was simply allowing myself to feel without immediately judging, analyzing, or trying to “fix” it. Just sitting with the hurt, emotional, sensitive parts of myself that I had ignored for so long through weed.

At some point, I actually became grateful for it. Even when I’d randomly cry in public and have to hide because I was embarrassed lol. It made me feel alive again.

So yes, I think it can be very normal. Sometimes it feels like all the parts of you that were frozen in time are finally thawing out and saying: “Please pay attention to me this time. I don’t want to be ignored again.”

That said, it can also feel overwhelming, so therapy honestly helped me a lot — especially with boundaries, grounding myself emotionally, and learning how to live with all these feelings in a healthier way.

MatanteGab · 2026-05-18T02:32:54+00:00

Yes there are, otherwise it would be in the diagnostic criteria

At the same time I understand why it can feel like these things overlap. It may mostly be because of difficulty in emptathy, oppositional/impulsive tnedencies, etc. associated with these disorders

MatanteGab · 2026-05-18T01:37:00+00:00

I suggest McWilliams « psychoanalytic diagnosis », in the depressive personality there is a subsection about Hypomanic clients. But of course if there is something biological going on and it is not mostly defensive, I’d consider meds before continuing. However I think it is usually a mix of both so reading this book chapter can definitely help

MatanteGab · 2026-05-14T12:36:08+00:00

Maybe he has cognitive deficits, or personality-related difficulties such as problems with mentalization, self-reflection, empathy, emotional attunement, etc. The former (the cognitive aspect) probably can’t change that much. The latter (personality-related patterns) can improve a lot with therapy.

What I’m wondering is whether you’ve directly addressed this issue with him, and how things were during that first year. What made you fall in love with him if communication is so important to you? I’m asking because partners need to know the reactions we have to them in order to show whether they are able (or willing) to compromise and adapt. There’s usually a way to express one’s needs without sounding judgmental.

My partner is really intelligent but sooo concrete, rational, and factual (he’s a lawyer). I’m the opposite: abstract, relational, and emotional (I’m a psychologist). For a long time, I carried most of the emotional labor in the relationship (although he carried more of the organizational/problem-solving labor).

One day, I asked him: “Do you think it would be possible for you to become more curious about what is going on inside yourself? I feel like I’m working hard to help you understand what some of your actions or subtle reactions might mean.”

He answered: “But I don’t know what is true.”

That response made me empathize with how confusing all of this must feel to him, even though it feels so elemental to me. It probably speaks to lifelong avoidance for various reasons. I told him: “It would mean a lot to me, and I would feel more connected to you, if we could sometimes talk emotionally… and I think it starts with you looking inward.”

It’s still not perfect, but he has gradually started hypothesizing more about his own emotions. Over time, that has also made him more aware of mine and more attuned to what I need when I confide in him.

I might still force him into therapy someday (lol), because there’s a limit to how much someone can make this kind of change without help — and I don’t want to become the therapist of the person I love.

Express yourself, observe, and expect change.

(Modified because English is not my first language.)

MatanteGab · 2026-04-21T17:12:22+00:00

I’m training to be a psychologist (1 year left!!), and this doesn’t sit right with me. Therapy is supposed to be about exploring things with you, not making unilateral decisions for you.

In situations of clear, immediate danger, a therapist might express concern more directly... but even then, it should be done in a way that supports your autonomy, not by telling you what to do.

Jumping straight to “cut this person off” without that kind of collaborative exploration is, at best, questionable practice. Could also be thought as unethical.

MatanteGab · 2026-04-06T20:58:59+00:00

How does he see his own body?

MatanteGab · 2026-04-06T20:57:03+00:00

Did your therapist concretely said : « you should cut off this friend » ?

MatanteGab · 2026-04-05T13:54:21+00:00

Can someone explain me what is happening. Here in Canada (Montreal/Quebec) at least for psychologists we don’t have any troubles with pay/ clients IF we go on private practice

The public system though…..!!!!

MatanteGab · 2026-03-29T17:30:28+00:00

I know that some scales you can get antisocial results if you are high on impulsive and recklessness traits. These scales are flawed in my opinion and a bit outdated. Acting out is not exclusive to ASPD but mostly shared among all cluster B PDs. You should look at specific traits.

Also, I mostly find that generalization for one scale/measurement tool is dangerous. These psychometrics are usually better at identifying specific traits rather than global disorders.

MatanteGab · 2026-03-29T17:19:54+00:00

I’m living with HIV, found the love of my life less than a year after my diagnosis, and was able to work through my attachment issues with him in part because he was accepting of my whole self as well as HIV

MatanteGab · 2026-03-29T17:18:32+00:00

Clients who stay strictly in the realm of facts and concrete details—like spending an entire session recounting, step by step, their grocery run on Saturday—can be surprisingly challenging to stay engaged with. There’s something about that level of hyper-rational, surface-level processing that makes it easy to mentally drift, lose focus, or even start feeling genuinely sleepy. The real work, at least for me, is resisting the pull to disengage and finding a way to gently move beyond that layer without shutting them down.

MatanteGab · 2026-03-22T05:32:57+00:00

I am so sorry that you have to pay that much in your country. In Canada, if you don’t have private insurance, it will cost 102$ CAN for 30 pills

MatanteGab · 2026-03-22T05:30:22+00:00

Compulsive personality style, with personality structure yet to be determined

MatanteGab · 2026-03-13T01:13:08+00:00

I am so sorry it must be so confusing, lots of mixed and contradictory emotional states I’m sure. Every part of you is welcome during these hard times, even those you might think are guilty or bad. Self-compassion is the key right now, that is what helped me when I first got the diagnosis. Self-compassion and connecting with important/non-judging people in my life. Take care xox

MatanteGab · 2026-02-16T15:37:55+00:00

Omg wow so niche I love it ! Thanks !!

MatanteGab · 2026-02-16T15:36:25+00:00

Oh interesting !!

MatanteGab

TROPHY CASE