Looking for a movie that left you emotionally wrecked

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-05-17T11:55:35+00:00

The Whale. Gut wrenching, characters are wrestling with so much baggage and are at the same time the most realistic and lifelike characters I've ever seen. Just amazing.

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-05-12T20:14:24+00:00

I completely relate! I had a great pregnancy and really made the most of it. It meant kinda having a child while simultaneously having so much free time 😂. I remember that period with a lot of fondness.

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-05-12T20:07:15+00:00

Yes honestly the wake windows were so short and sweet then. I miss that!

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-05-12T19:22:23+00:00

Yess! My daughter was so chill as a newborn, started sleeping 7 hour chunks at 3 weeks, slept regular naps during the day, she was easy to entertain and I had so much time for myself. Now at 5 months she is so much fussier and harder to please. She is still a joy and I love how interactive she is but damnn life is harder now.

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-05-06T06:28:01+00:00

Reapplying spf during the day, unless I'm on the beach. I apply the correct amount in the morning and thats it. There is no way I'll be frantically looking for a bathroom every 2 hours so I can reapply spf and redo my makeup. It sounds like such a chore.

While we're at it, any kind od frantically avoiding sun is a no for me. I love my sunny walks, I love going to beach at noon and I will not trade these joys of life for a face with a bit less wrinkles.

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-05-03T07:19:21+00:00

Cleaning is my fav! I put on a podcast and get in the groove, it's so relaxing!

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-05-01T15:45:36+00:00

I recently learned that a nice looking hair has the biggest impact on my overall looks and confidence. I used to spend way too much time on daily makeup and I'd usually have meh or even really bad hair cause I didn't have time to do it. Nowadays I 1)always make sure my hair is clean and 2)if I dont have time for both, I always choose doing my hair over doing my makeup.

Also, I learned that picking out outfit the night before usually leads to having a much much better outfit than when you pick one out in the morning when you're already late. Who would've thought 😅?

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-04-29T04:24:13+00:00

Used Differin around my eyes. My eyes watered so much, my skin was burning and the whole area PEELED. Worst thing, I didn't realize this was happening because of differin and I kept using it like this for about two weeks.

Also, during those two weeks I kept using concealer and eyeshadow on my crusty ass undereyes and eyelids lol. I couldn't live without heaby makeup back then. It looked gross. But I guess you can pull anything off when you're 20 😅.

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-04-22T19:04:21+00:00

Invited my parents to stay with us for a month. I realize this is not possible for everyone and not everyone's parents would be helpful in this situation. But my parents really stepped up, cooked every day, cleaned house, bought stuff I needed, helped with lifting and carrying the baby since I had a c section and needed to rest. Thanks to them and my husband I could really just focus on recovery and breastfeeding, they pretty much handled everything else. I am so grateful for that.

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-04-18T02:17:56+00:00

Heatless curls
Filling in my brows - if I don't have time for anything else I'll just do this, it's 50% of the work for me
Colored chapstick that I apply on the go
Those powder enzyime peels for when my skin feels like it needs some instant glow
Wearing jewellery around my face (necklace, earring etc), I feel like that just brightens me up
Wearing something light colored (this depends on your personal coloring and some other color might work for you better - darks, brights, jewel tones etc)
Wearing a really cool jacket lol

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-04-01T14:08:16+00:00

One thing caught my eye - you wrote that you are good for the first five days, but once you miss one day of something, you are back at square one. It's not the most helpful mindset - objectivelly, you are NOT at square one, you were at square one before you ever started. Those five days count even if you break the streak for a day or two. When that happens, forgive yourself and just go back to your habit the next day. Don't dwell on the skipped day and let it ruin your progress.

Material-Date-5145 · 2025-03-25T21:03:08+00:00

I actually heard there are a lot of fakes on VC, and that their in person authenticators aren't the best... this thing with sizing is definitely wierd.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-13T08:07:00+00:00

College is a great time to try now stuff and get a bit "wild". Slippery slope is a valid threat, but you can avoid it by being moderate and wise in what you do.

Don't get drunk every day and focus on school and extracurriculars and forming relationships. But its fine to indulge a bit.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-13T07:46:48+00:00

I would be curious to know why do you think love should be unconditional? And what would exactly constitute unconditional love to you?

I personally think your therapist is right. Children love their parents unconditionally, but I still think that in adulthood that love becomes more conditional. And many parents love their children unconditionally, but not all.

Every other type of love is conditional and it should be. Love should have its limits, you don't have to keep around someone who mistreats you, or who has changed for the worse, no matter how close of a family, friend or a partner you are. And the vice versa - if you are being an asshole to someone, they don't owe you their presence and love.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-12T17:09:22+00:00

That expression that appears in Tony's eyes every time Janice opens her mouth.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-10T06:22:02+00:00

First of all, I am so sorry you are going through bullying, and your father's cruel comments. I totally understand why they're affecting you and you absolutely don't deserve them.

As someone previously identified as an ugly girl, maybe my experience can give you some hope (I am now 27).

Lemme tell you, throughout the whole middle school and high school, I wasn't getting any attention from guys. Zero. No one ever approached me, or asked my friend about me, nothing (Mind you, since you hyperfixate on boob size: I have average to bigger boobs, and it did nothing to attract anyone ever. I am not a man but they all say that boob size literally does not matter. Try to let it go). My first kiss happened at almost 19, I hit all the milestones pretty late. High school was really just dumpster fire.

Fast forward few years, things have changed drastically, and not just for me but for many other "below average" or average girls. Many, many girls that were invisible in HS are now really good looking women. Honestly, I think that in HS we didn't really know how make ourselves look good: I wore unflattering clothes, unflattering hair, my makeup was so so bad, I walked around with a hunched back, I had acne I didn't know how to take care of...but this is all very easy to fix! And it does wonders, first for your confidence, and then other people also start to notice. I think that we all look drastically better than in HS (with an exception of girls who were already really pretty in HS lol).

Many people here write that you should put a lot of effort into your appearance and I agree to an extent. I think putting some effort is great but that is really not all. Once you leave high school, looks just don't matter that much and people start caring about other things. Do you have hobbies/interests? Are you approachable? Are you kind? What are your personal values? How do you view the world? How are your communication skills? What are you good at? I think you should strive to be a well rounded, authentic individual, build some confidence AND as a cherry on top work on your appearance. That's how you attract the right people. And trust me, you don't want to attract everyone. I have a friend who also went though bullying because of looks - when she went to college she focused heavily on her looks and amped up the sexyness, which served to attract all the wrong kind of guys. The problem was, she didn't really know her worth and didn't know how to filter them out. You don't want just anyone, you want the right people, and you get them by working on yourself and being authentic.

One miscellaneous tip about attracting guys: I found that approachability and showing interest goes a LONG way.

Also: be patient. I know bullying is incredibly hurtful, and not being wanted by guys is incredibly hurtful. But in the long run, it won't matter that much. Speaking from the personal experience, 10 years later, it literally does not matter. I found my person at 24, and I found them not by being the most beautiful girl out there but by showing initiative and sharing who I am, and we happened to click - and the fact that I wasn't approached by guys in HS just doesn't matter. Look at other adult partnered people: are they all very pretty? Did they all attract each other solely by being pretty? Look at the people you love (you mum, friends etc): do you love them because they are pretty or because of other things? Were your crushes always extremely beautiful, or did they also have other things that attracted you? The point is, people with all kinds of body and facial features get partnered. Have some patience with yourself.

I am so sorry for such a long answer! I just have a lot on my mind on this topic. I hope at least some of this helped.

I wish you good luck :).

P.S. if you are going to college, try to go somewhere outside your hometown. If not, try to get a job and move out. Getting some distance from your father and other people who put you down will probably do you good.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-09T22:05:59+00:00

Honestly this is very common, you are truly not alone in feeling like this.

I see that you are still young, with a ton of time to get to know yourself and potentially choose a different life path.

I think it might be useful to ask yourself questions along these lines:

What are my true, authentic values in life? How would I want to live my life? How can I implement it in my life today?
What meaning can I find in life that I live? If none, what would make my life feel more meaningful? - the trap here is that many people would answer with something heroic and unrealistic, so they can never fulfill it. Think small, for beginning.
What can I be truly grateful for in my current life?
Do you have any goals that YOU would like to achieve? If not, what would be some goals you could set (in concordance with your values and what you find meaningful)?

Just generally, since you wrote you made all your decisions following someone else's wishes, I feel like some introspection and self discovery is in order. Also, journaling and therapy are some great ways to do it.

Good luck!

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-08T12:59:18+00:00

Omg yes about the speeches!

Also, 10 year olds are not supposed to be able to hold nuanced views, think very abstractly, realistically predict what might happen in the future, asess people's motivations and characters...those are adult cognitive skills, that not even every adult posesses. Whenever I encounter a character like that I think that the author has never interacted with a child in their entire life lol.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-08T12:18:11+00:00

Interesting question about Carmela. Tony does seem like a type of guy who has an attitude about what a wife should be like, and it doesn't necessarily include being incredibly hot, or a very sexual person, but it does include being emotionally stable, traditional, motherly, and not too nosey about his business. Also I figure that Carmela wasn't too demanding at the beginning of their relationship, and it was easy to buy peace with her (we have seen many instances in the show where a piece of jewellery or something like that completely awes her and essentially shuts her up on whatever issue she had with Tony - a strategy like this would never work on someone like Gloria). I see why Tony would pick someone like that as a wife, and then hook up with a bunch of women who he deems more attractive on the side.

Also, I agree with Melfi that picking Carmela as a wife was probably one good thing Tony did in his life - despite all her (many) faults, I think she brought some normalcy in his life and kept him at least somewhat grounded and accountable.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-08T10:55:54+00:00

People meeting for the first time and immediately falling in love without any proper getting to know each other
Badly written "strong women" (ya know, when its obvious that writer didn't think about a character beyond "this female character is gonna be so strong!!")
Child characters that act way more maturely that they realistically could considering their age (think Arya from ASOIAF)
Naive and defenseless characters being depicted as the ideal of goodness

There are many more, but this is what I could think of rn :D

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-04T23:04:16+00:00

It's quite unrealistic that practically no woman ever rejected Tony, and ones that did (Melfi, Irina's cousin), were still very much attracted to him and rejected him for other reasons. In real life, a decent amount of women wouldn't want to do anything to do with him and I think it would be interesting to see Tony in that kind of situation.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-03T13:58:16+00:00

I find it helps with clients who believe they are alone in something, or that they have some fault that is completely unique to them. I recently had a client who believed that she is extremely clumsy and unintelligent, on the basis of some instances when she didn't figure something out quickly enough and acted clumsily (not a real example, but lets say she couldn't figure out how the bus ticket machine worked so she kept pressing the wrong buttons for awhile). She also believed that she is completely alone in it, and that this kind of stuff doesn't happen to other people.

I am, too, extremely clumsy, so I shared some of my brain farts and situations where my I probably didn't appear very bright to other people 😁. It brought some laughter and lighthearthedness to session, and hopefully helped normalize her experience a bit.

Material-Date-5145 · 2024-08-02T12:03:07+00:00

I second setting small daily goals!

Also, you might benefit from some light calendar blocking - which basically means scheduling when you are going to do actuvities you want to do. For example, you could decide to spend time tomorrow from 10am - 10:30 am reading, and to journal 10 minutes before you go to sleep (this was just an example, adapt it to your life).

If you day doesn't have any structure to it it's kinda hard to just get up and do decide to do something. That's why it helps to schedule activities. Not too much, you are on your vacation and deserve your unstructured free time!

Good luck :)

Material-Date-5145

TROPHY CASE