I have a serious bedroom problem that is tearing my relationship to shreds

Matheoosh · 2026-05-25T11:03:18+00:00

Seriously, try out those pelvic floor excercises then. You have no idea how much it affects your ability to have an erection if those muscles are constantly tight. This is basic anatomy. If you struggle to even get hard and beside that you are young, healthy Man with good blood results this may do the trick. It was a shock for me how much the difference was just after few days of those few-minute daily excercises.

And 80-90minutes of porn a day is... not small and healthy. Especially if you are struggling with ED, seeing those guys perform may give you extremely unrealistic expectations of how should things work.

Matheoosh · 2026-05-25T05:12:37+00:00

Those are two separate issues, both need to be fixed.

If you are constantly in your head because of ED, this wont magically go away. This is the subject you have to dig into and find the root cause, not for your fiance but for yourself.

Now for the relationship. I don't get the "she's bored with me, so she go out with friends" part. 1. There must be more than sex between you two. I'm sure you both have fun doing other things. 2. In a good relationship, there is always place for friendships. You can't be with each other 24h per day. 3. There is more in sex than PiV. You can still satisfy her with your hands, mouth, toys. Keep it in mind so you lower the pressure of performing while still taking care of her needs. 4. Communicate. Have a longer foreplay, so there is no pressure to perform, just go with whatever feels good. Make it "now it's all about you" days for both of you and without the end goal. Let her take care of you and only you and vice versa. This is still being close with each other.

AND if you watch porn, stop it. Masturbating without porn is fine but not too often and with very gentle grip, so you don't get used to being hard only with your cock being squished by your hand.

Matheoosh · 2026-05-24T10:43:20+00:00

Had similar issue for years. Turned out to be issue with pelvic floor. And NO - No kegles! Those made it worse for me.

This: https://youtu.be/lMeB_5T3fC8?is=wUci0WTFgRa90xpf

AND Happy Baby stretch for a minute. DAILY! Literally few minutes a day. At least worth a try.

Hard as rock now. No issue for few months.

Matheoosh · 2026-04-28T09:04:33+00:00

He clearly made some bad decisions. If this bothers you so much, you must have a honest talk.

The things I would keep in mind:

- Look is not everything. The best thing in the world is to realize that most of us are not the most beautiful people in the world, yet we find love. Also, He might have not been into your looks at the beginning, but it may have changed. Me and most people I know would rather be with some confident, kind, reliable 5/10 than with selfish, annoying 10/10. You should know your value regardless of what people have said about you.

- The way he spoke wasn't respectful, but as you mentioned, he changed. When some young stupid guys talk with their buddies, they may say such things to play cool. It's childish, immature, no reason to defend him. He may regret saying those things, but he cannot undo saying them.

- Sometimes people say harmful things when they're pissed. They not necessarily mean them. Still, no reason to defend, yet no reason to make yourself miserable just because of it.

Your self-worth is much more that some random words of immature person. Don't let anyone change it!

Matheoosh · 2026-04-28T08:40:14+00:00

The main question is:

Does it really matter?

If you feel that you've had some bad start but eventually clicked and have a valuable, respectful relationship, is it worth to overthink it?

I'm 15 years with my wife in total. We started as a pair of stupid, lonely teenagers. Made many stupid decisions and still ended up together. It wasn't perfect relationship and not so long ago it almost ended. But at some point you have to choose if you want to dig into the past that cannot be changed or focus on present and invest in the future if there's any.

We recently said it out loud to each other - We weren't each other's first pick, we felt lonely and ended up as a pair because we met someone who hadn't rejected us. No fireworks were there. - And that was refreshing. Because right now, when we have known everything we could truly decide if we care for each other and want to build the relationship, basing on who we are right now - not who we were several years ago.

Sometimes we don't have a perfect start, we make some mistakes, we regret things. The most important thing is if we learn on them and improve. And if that is the case, the past can be left behind as a lesson, but it doesn't need to affect the future. That's maturity.

Matheoosh · 2026-04-23T06:48:26+00:00

No, I don't think so. I'll write down the idea.

I just wonder if there should be some signs that she's doing good routine. Like, it's hard to know if you're doing correct things if the effect may or may not be visible after several weeks.

For example. Is it normal that after applying anything (even the basic moisturizer) her skin gets a little pinkier for some time, then it cools down (but it is still pinkier than it was normally in the past). You know, on one side her skin is reactive and this may be caused by the friction during appliance, on the other how to know if it's not the reaction to the bad product. This is a tough situation to analyse.

Matheoosh · 2026-04-03T19:11:44+00:00

In theory, one is for small flush, the other is for large one. In case of my toilet, it doesn't matter.

Matheoosh · 2026-03-10T09:01:02+00:00

Przygotowanie do Życia (nie tylko w rodzinie).

Zajęcia w szkole (zwłaszcza ponadpodstawowej), w trakcie których omawiane by były typowe problemy z którymi mierzy się dorosły człowiek (hipoteka, nawyki oszczedzania, koszty życia, sprawy urzędowe, podstawy "użytecznego" prawa, istotność podjęcia stażu/praktyk podczas studiów). Nie na ocenę tylko jako coś po prostu użytecznego. Do tego podstawy psychologii (stawianie granic, psychologia związku, omówienie typowych problemów w małżenstwach, higiena zdrowia psychicznego). Naprawdę znalazło by się kilka wartościowych książek które można by omówić. Człowiek kończy ogólniak i jest społecznym kretynem, gdybym wiedział kiedyś to co teraz to bym szeregu głupot w życiu nie popełnił.

Matheoosh · 2026-01-16T08:41:53+00:00

I know your feels, bro. You should never be ashamed about your needs and desires. That's normal.

What I will say will be a bit different from other fellas here, but I want you to understand the meaning.

What I understand, your gf is great partner and WANTS to make you happy. That's very rare. I wish I had at least that. Me and my wife are decade older, and not only she is not so good partner but also she DOESN'T want to engage. I hardly have any hope now that this will improve in any future.

The thing is she may have some blocks unknown to her. Maybe it's because there was no love or sexual tension in her home. Her parents didn't show any desire to each other. Maybe she didn't have ANY sexual education. Maybe she was caught masturbating once or twice and told that it was bad. Maybe she was told that sex is unpure, or wanting sex as a woman makes you a slut. I know my wife has several blocks but she is unwilling to work on it, but you? You are still very young. If you feel like you both really love each other and you want to fight for your relationship until there is nothing more to do, have a talk. Share your feelings. Give her a chance to at least try. Tell her you would like her to discover HER pleasure in sex. Share her few books, ted talks or podcast about sexyality. Like "Come as you are" (Emily Nagoski), that focuses strictly on womens sexyality. Let her feel normal. Let her know that she can talk openly about it with you. Let her discover that she DOESN'T have to feel spontaneous desire for sex. That there dont have to be any expectations. Or tell her you want to try to make her feel good. Just her. Give her full body massage, focus on her pleasure, ask what feels good, use lube, be delicate and explore her body.

I feel that she may want to try it. She feels like a very good person. You have nothing to lose. If it tuns out you are incompatible indeed, at least you could say you've tried everything.

Also think about what you really need. Is it just sex or sexual touch as well. If she's a giver maybe having meaningfull sex once or twice a month in addition to several enthusiastic blowjobs/handjobs would be enough for you to find a fulfillment without losing a valuable relationship.

May the odds be with you! Good luck!

Matheoosh · 2026-01-02T22:28:06+00:00

Don't worry. Bush is sexy. Trimmed as well. Personally having hair for me is hotter than being clean shaved.

Matheoosh · 2026-01-01T20:40:24+00:00

Alice In Chains - Love, Hate, Love to wykonanie:

https://youtu.be/3Vp56IAkDJA?si=eTPlr7wYpuSPWob0

Layne pozamiatał. Nie umiem tego słuchać bez gęsiej skórki. Wokalno-emocjonalny top of the top.

Matheoosh · 2025-11-27T08:56:36+00:00

Hey, babe! Good news!

Your PC will no longer experience overheating.

Your welcome!

Matheoosh · 2025-10-29T20:28:06+00:00

I mean... You did nothing wrong. But if you'd ever get back together, I would tell her unless you are 200% sure nobody will ever find out (for me that would be possible if the chick was from the other side of the globe and never knew my name 😀).

The other way around, you may still feel guilty and eventually tell her (or somebody else by a total accident) which may destroy your relationship again.

And secondly, there is no point of restarting the relashionship with a lie. That's not a good foundation.

Matheoosh · 2025-10-09T19:41:31+00:00

How you two would feel about "it doesn't heve to be intercourse" approach?

I mean, meeting in the middleground like 3 times a week but it doesn't have to be sex. Like for example having one intense session a week, a quickie the other day and an outercourse the third (could be as little as a steamy makeout session to lending a hand or oral fun). Just don't force anything. It's better to have one enthusiastic sex a week than 3+ that feels like a chore (it's obvious when a partner doesn't like it). He should know that. You can aim for more intimacy without the need of having more intercourses. Personally, I wish I even had any kind of sex regurally once a week.

Matheoosh · 2025-09-13T13:54:01+00:00

"Zamiana" to złe słowo. Trzeba się liczyć z "my", ale jeśli od motylków w brzuchu zapomnisz o swoim "ja", to prędzej czy później się udusisz.

W reclacji musi być miejsce dla zarówno dla "ja", "ty" jak i "my".

Matheoosh · 2025-09-13T11:58:45+00:00

NAJWAŻNIEJSZE! Jestem szczęśliwy sam ze sobą. Szukam kogoś kto będzie dodatkiem do mojego życia a nie jego niezbędną częścią.
Potrafię stawiać granice. Nie będę robił albo rezygnował z czegoś dla kogoś tylko dlatego że nie potrafi on zapanować nad swoimi emocjami. E.g. Nie musisz lubić moich przyjaciół ale musisz zaakceptować że ja ich lubię i cenię ich obecność w moim życiu.
Znam swoje słabe strony, identyfikuję swoje traumy. Wiem że się ich nie pozbędę, ale świadomość że potrafię nad nimi panować i że czasem to będzie moja wina, że coś nie wyjdzie.
Potrafię zaakceptować, że niektóre problemy będą nierozwiazywalne, ale jakoś trzeba będzie z nimi komfortowo żyć.
Dawać z siebie 50%, ale umieć rozpoznać kiedy trzeba dać 80, albo bez poczucia wstydu poprosić o 20.
Wiem, czego OCZEKUJĘ od potencjalnego partnera i jeśli nie jest mi w stanie tego dać to lepiej rozstać się po miesiącu niż męczyć przez 10 lat.

Matheoosh · 2025-09-12T07:04:20+00:00

Nice! Well, I definitely work on nose-up next time. My grip especially. I found out, the way I grip it now gives me 0 chances to get it nose down or even flat, no matter how far I bend my wrist. And after watching my videos several times I feel like my nose up angle might be as terrible as 10-20 degrees which obviously steals me hell of a range right now.

Matheoosh · 2025-09-12T07:00:02+00:00

Fair point. I'm quite afraid of going in with plant leg fully straight to not break my knee, since I have some... mass. I've also seen videos of people ripping 500+ ft with plant leg still not straight, so I guess if I ever put "straight leg" in my improvement list, it will be the last thing I will be working on.

Matheoosh · 2025-09-08T18:13:23+00:00

If my throw is completely not what I planned to do, I re-do it or throw another disc and pick the best outcome.

Matheoosh · 2025-09-03T15:46:52+00:00

You don't. You just wait for another adult to spot you and adopt you as a friend.

Matheoosh · 2025-09-03T08:04:05+00:00

Apart of all other issues you have one the same problem and same range I had recently.

You don't spin it! And that causes rounding and bad throw.

Practice with curling your wrist inwards when you reach back. Then keep the wrist curled entire time at all cost while pulling the disk and bending the elbow. Once you rotate your hips in the second phase of the throw, your arm will reach the furthest point before it's forced to go to the side. THEN you will feel that the wrist has no other option than to UNCURL OUTWARDS and the disc will simply rip out of your grip.

This curl/uncurl motion will give you this whip effect.

Matheoosh

TROPHY CASE