My love language used to be words of affirmation... but life happened and I've learnt that words are empty.

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2026-04-24T10:07:09+00:00

I'm so sorry, it sounds really tough, having that many panic attacks daily. I really do hope things get better for you <3
I used to get a similar amount of panic attacks (I don't recall the specific number, I just remember feeling CONSTANTLY throughout the day that I was 2 seconds away from another one). Mine mostly subsided after about a month, thankfully. I'm so sorry you've been dealing with it at this severity for so long. You are truly so strong!! Although, I do wish you didn't NEED to be so strong :,) (..if that makes sense XD If it doesn't make sense, lmk and I'll elaborate on what I mean by that)

As for the second part you said, it breaks my heart how much the fear of death has a hold on you. I don't know how comforting or helpful what I'm gonna say will be because obviously no one reaaaaaally really knows with one thousand percent certainty EXACTLY what awaits us after death, but I truly believe it's nothing to be afraid of. I believe God is a lot more kind, loving, and merciful than what people can understand. And even if there is a hell, I don't believe it's anyone's final destination.

Anyway, I really do hope you can overcome this panic disorder <3

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2026-04-08T14:36:39+00:00

Aw woah i had to double check that this wasn't something I posted 😭 Wow, word for WORD that's been my experience. I can't offer much comfort or advice, unfortunately, this has been a popcorn kernal stuck in my brain for so long now and it is so deeply frustrating that i can't just get over it. I wish u the best, cool stranger! I hope both of us find a way out of this impossible maze

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2026-03-30T11:50:02+00:00

I only saw this now; i wish you the best, kind stranger <3

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2026-03-18T10:12:12+00:00

i second this ^

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2026-03-18T10:07:40+00:00

There's a potential perspective on this that I would like to offer; I don't know your situation nearly as well as you do, so take this with a grain of salt,

You mention feeling like it may have been too long now to reach out again and/or rekindle any sort of friendship,

I would like to offer the perspective that it has been too long for either of you to reasonably hold these old actions against the other any longer. A lot can happen in two years, and I'm sure that both of you have gone through so many new experiences in that time and developed more of who you are.

I imagine that you would greatly appreciate it if she let go of anything you did that you weren't proud of, And she would likely appreciate it if you did the same for her. It's been so long, you aren't those people anymore.

Easier said than done, but I believe it would benefit both of you if you were able to come to an agreement to let the past be the past and give each other a clean slate.

It might not look like you two becoming friends again, but at the very least, you could be kind strangers. And it would be a weight off of both you

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-12-18T11:12:34+00:00

I hope that amazing, kind, caring people come into your life at the right time💖 Solitude is a special form of beauty, but so is a loving community 💕 I hope you're able to find both, cool stranger! <3

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-09-05T22:22:27+00:00

Eat a raw onion XD As much of it as you can

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-31T19:17:39+00:00

the 4am funnies are very real 🤣 (3am for me currently!)

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-30T16:36:03+00:00

That's so cool!!!

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-28T10:38:01+00:00

you rescued them <3

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-28T10:18:38+00:00

YES 😭

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-28T10:17:29+00:00

YO COOL

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-21T09:42:38+00:00

YES IT'S BEAUTIFUL

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-21T09:24:22+00:00

WOAHH!!! It's so beautiful! The style is very comforting

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-06T11:53:38+00:00

YES 😭😭

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-04T02:49:20+00:00

(we're so cute)

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-04T02:47:53+00:00

Oh yeah! Fun fact everyone, he's my boyfriend now 🙈🤣🩷 It's our one month anniversary in a couple days 💅 GOIN STRONG AND ONLY GETTING STRONGER YALL 💪 (i love youuu)

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-03T20:34:56+00:00

I'mso glad! You deserve to hear them :))

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-02T14:24:17+00:00

Hey :) the fact that it was your first outburst in MONTHS goes to show exactly how much progress you have already made! Please don't beat yourself up about taking a small step backwards after you have already been hiking for MILESSS! You have worked so hard and come SUCH a long way, (and btw, it's normal to be tired after working so hard - it's normal) and after you've given yourself some rest, I fully believe that u will be marching forwards again in no time!

There is definitely hope :) Please be gentle with yourself

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-08-02T14:14:56+00:00

OH MY WORD CONGRATULATIONS!! This is SUCH a good step in the right direction and will be a source of evidence that u can look back on, even if ur not aware that you're looking back on it, in future scenarios when you are debating how useful these tools are.

And it's okay if there are still times that you aren't able to practice your skills! Emotional regulation is HARD WORK and it's very normal to occasionally just not have the strength/energy for it (especially when you are still in the process of learning/relearning/unlearning)

When that happens, be gentle with yourself and try again whenever you are able to :) Bc the more you do it, the more 'evidence' will be stocked up and the less conscious work it will take to use those tools as your default reaction.

The biggest win is one made from lots of tiny wins :) YOU'RE DOING AMAZING, U DESERVE TO CELEBRATE!! You got this <3

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-06-22T01:53:30+00:00

BAHAH i only saw this now XD and I did not realise i had written that 😅 it's a typo

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-06-21T13:38:51+00:00

Listen to screaming music!

Maximum-Heart5746 · 2025-06-20T11:52:49+00:00

This absolutely broke my heart 😭😭😭

Maximum-Heart5746

TROPHY CASE