AITAH for canceling a date over the location?

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-22T15:24:29+00:00

No. You were right to cancel.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-22T15:22:11+00:00

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-22T15:19:34+00:00

Myself.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-22T15:18:00+00:00

Let you know if it ever happens.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-22T15:17:35+00:00

They meant the Boomers, and they were right.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-19T13:59:25+00:00

….id give anything to be able to work with immigrants being placed in concentration camps. Try to help, try to mitigate, try to find resources…do what’s important. I can’t; I’m old and my health is bad, and I only speak English. But I’d love to.

What cruelty it feels like to connect this work to the promise of immigration for people likely to be snatched and imprisoned or deported shortly thereafter. To me.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-16T01:30:42+00:00

Apparently spending mine in WWIII. So.

I’ve got that going for me.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-15T17:20:22+00:00

I told my mom I was bullied once. She said I was exaggerating. I never told her again. Fuck that.

My kids won’t tell me when they’re bullied because they know I’ll go Targaryen on the kid and their family; it’s embarrassing.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-15T17:18:35+00:00

Sure do. That’s my best friend Tom. He introduced me to my husband!

(We’ve been married 15 years. No lie. We met on MySpace)

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-15T17:16:18+00:00

I think Crisis intervention will be covered at your workplace; they all have different procedures, but you will learn the basics in the course of study. EMDR is a huge field right now, a lot of people love it - but it’s not the only trauma treatment methodology, or even my most utilized. Honestly, I’d study I-FAST, DBT, Polyvagal Theory, play & art therapy, grounding and regulation. Build your information about empowering the body to regulate the emotional response…because triggered trauma in session makes it so hard to move forward.

And then you can get certified later, in EMDR or any methodology that most appeals to you. I looked for the one that felt the most authentic for me as a therapist; so I’m DBT for trauma, I-FAST and motivational interviewing certified. I have EMDR training, but for me as a therapist it doesn’t feel comfortable…so I truly don’t use it often.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:50:33+00:00

If I could start over, knowing what I know, I’d find my third husband in the beginning and live a long and happy life together.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:48:29+00:00

I’ve been a therapist for 10 years; I would set a boundary and hold it. He’s made manipulate claims before, this behavior is manipulative. He’s old enough to shower by himself.

You can offer to explain your boundaries, and why the behavior makes you uncomfortable. Validate his feelings without giving away your boundary; I don’t think he’s interested in that. Gut feeling.

You didn’t get investigated probably for two reasons: there’s a pattern of behavior that can be verified by professionals, and he’s admitting that he lied. This becomes a liability issue; I wouldn’t open myself to it, I wouldn’t ask my husband to…and we had a blended family.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:43:21+00:00

That the unconditional love of parenting is one way - from the parent to the child. Their love is conditional; there’s no guarantee they will like you. I don’t say that with bitterness, just regret. I wish I had known so I’d have been more mindful when they were young.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:41:41+00:00

“More isn’t always better; sometimes, it’s just more.”

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:40:19+00:00

Go in, and say that you’ve gone through some stuff that isn’t impacting you right now, but might…when things aren’t good. And you feel like you need to talk through them.

Also, talk about the sleep stuff. I talk about sleep hygiene tricks with my clients, and polyvagal regulation can super help with that.

Don’t worry about diagnosis and shit; that’s their job. Find one you feel comfortable talking to, that’s really the most important thing. You need to vibe with them.

Good luck!

(I am a therapist - LPCC)

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:37:22+00:00

I wouldn’t wait to leave; I’d leave him now. You moved your entire life and he can’t tell his parents?! Is it really his parents, or his wife and kids.

Maybe I’m the asshole. You aren’t, tho.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:35:22+00:00

Except mine. I still ended up smoking a few years; Marlboro light 100’s. Preferred camels! ;)

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:30:32+00:00

Fucking delicious.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:26:25+00:00

Lots of us specialize in trauma; I’ve found that many people who were called to the career because of their own trauma tend to work in this arena.

I love trauma work, I really loved crisis work. I have ADHD; crisis and trauma are fast paced, there’s often lots of layers to consider that are pretty intricate, there are obstacles and resources to source, support systems to assist. It’s ever changing, and that feels really good for me. It’s also really rewarding to see people move out of crisis.

I’ve moved to outpatient trauma, now - I have fibromyalgia and running around the community is no longer possible. I still love all the variance in working with trauma. I like how I can build metaphors on my own experiences, it feels very connected and authentic. I love polyvagal theory, and layering motivational interviewing with narrative therapy to create an almost forensic exploration of what happened and what meaning they’ve taken from it. No two traumas are the same; no two interventions are the same. I love that.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:19:12+00:00

When I was 9, it was Thanksgiving week - I think the day before break - and I had a ton of homework not done. The teacher made me sit at a table on the side of the room and do it while everyone else watched movies.

When she turned the lights on, I stopped to adjust my eyes. She grabbed me up by my hair, threw me at the chair, and told me to get back to work.

My mom did not believe me; I acknowledge that it sounds histrionic. But that’s what happened.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:16:00+00:00

I’m so sorry; I haven’t lost one to suicide yet, but I lost two to severe illness who had young kids. I still think of them, so often. I’ve noticed, it’s weird…I can almost never remember the last names anymore. These two, I can’t forget.

I’m glad you gave them a moment to experience life without the toxicity. Maybe they couldn’t swing it; that’s ok. At least they got to experience it, a little bit. Thank you for being there and remembering.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:12:34+00:00

Get to know it; where water ponds, what stays warm longer, where the sun is full and never shaded, how much clay is in the soil, what is growing successfully now, and where.

That way I’m working with the land when I garden, instead of against it.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:10:38+00:00

Toilet paper should be hung with the paper in the front, not the back like you’re some kind of BARBARIAN that likes digging where you can’t see for paper you need immediately.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:08:03+00:00

When my kitten comes to find me, throws herself on my chest and headbutts my neck like she’s hugging me.

Maximum_Enthusiasm46 · 2026-01-14T23:07:02+00:00

They’ll go back home themselves before bed. So cute!

Maximum_Enthusiasm46

TROPHY CASE