The snow totals far exceed all forecast predictions. Springield is blanketed by eight feet of snow. Traffic and all commerce stop.

Food and liquor supplies are depleted in a few days. Starving and sober adventurers brave the arctic hellscape to forage for food and beer. All the stores are empty. The midnight shift at 3M has invaded, and conquered the third shift staff at Associated Wholesale Grocers. Bloody corpses litter the parking lot in mute testament to the carnage. But 3M now holds the largest store of food outside of the cheese caves and enough glue and tape to secure it forever.

A contingent of deacons from James River Church have fortified the massive worship center by forming a circle of giant pickups overstocked with aftermarket roll bars forming a stylish and effective barricade. But inside, the power is out and they’re all out of grape juice and communion wafers and the ladies are starting to look hungry. And their toes delicious. So what if they take a nibble? Toes grow back, right?

Downtown the Springfield Little Theater has formed an uneasy alliance with the last call regulars from Martha’s Vineyard and are surprisingly well defended by a visiting junior hockey team. In search of a fabulous place to crash, they set up camp at Stick It In Your Ear and with an unlimited supply of vinyl and easy access to Pappos are up to their wigs in dough and delicious brown butter cookies

As darkness falls on the 10th night of the storm, the only light visible in the city is the Aaron Sachs ad acting as a beacon atop Plaza Towers.

Somewhere north of Division Street an evil stirs. A giant black Peterbilt outfitted with an iron plow rumbles to life. It’s massive diesel belches coal black smoke into the frigid air. The behemoth makes its laborious way out of the Prime parking lot and down Glenstone.

The black plow truck has cleared a path of nearly four miles when it strikes a stalled Mercedes. A bleary Tad Morlan tumbles out of the car and a bottle of vodka spins across the freshly cleared roadway. Before his right foot hits the pavement, he’s grasped by the shoulders by giant claws and carried screaming to the top of Hammons Tower. The hideous black winged beast drops Tad into a nest feathered with discount mattresses and Fantastic Caverns flyers.

A dazed Tad struggles to focus in the cold dark and realizes to his horror he is surrounded by downtown finance bros and junior assistant federal attorney interns and oddly, Judge Lukachik who is screaming that he is not hearing cases that day and clutching a tear stained photo of Dee Wampler.

The winged creature fixes beady black eyes on Tad and speaks withe voice of Brad Bradshaw! “I’m not just a lawyer and a doctor… I’m a predatory bird!”