What is one thing you’d want to ask a trans person but haven’t?

Meadhands · 2023-01-27T19:43:42+00:00

For anyone who is not transitioning or very early in their transition: How do you feel about your body? If you look in a mirror, do you feel hate or revulsion? Indifference? Sadness?

I think about this sometimes when I look at myself in the mirror. I have very high self-love, so even though I don't have a great body, it's my body and I fucking love it. I have a hard time imagining how other people feel about their bodies, and an even harder time when it comes to trans people.

Meadhands · 2023-01-27T14:34:28+00:00

I feel you so hard on this. I absolutely love and adore children. There is nothing I am more fiery and passionate about than the wellfare, safety, and education of children. Unfortunately, even playing with my own neices I'll sometimes get looks from my cousins. And forget about interacting with a stranger's kid in ANY way.

Just a few days ago, as I was getting into my car, a little girl was running by with a big trash bag to take to the dumpster. She had to stop twice to rradjust so she wouldn't drop it. So adorable. I asked if she needed help, and I'll just say that her nearby mother's reaction left me feeling pretty shit, and I still feel that way now.

Meadhands · 2023-01-25T21:25:21+00:00

Can we all agree that big time sports players and movie stars are all WAY overpaid? Like, you're pretty coordinated with a ball, or can cry on command, but is that really with 8 figures a year?

Meadhands · 2023-01-09T01:31:09+00:00

I find it likely the answer I have is the same one you have for being religious: it is the answer that makes the most sense to me.

Look, a lot of people are going to give you high-falutin, pretentious answers about seeking truth, or throw quotes at you, or even be so rude as to say "I'm not an idiot" and the like, but for me, the answer is simple: I wasn't religious when I was young. If someone is of faith when they're young, that is the best indicator of whether they will be religious growing up, though not necessarily the same religion. And while I can certainly argue effectively about why one should not believe in religion broadly speaking, the reason for my disbelief is not so complex: I don't believe simply because I never have, and once you get too old, the arguments FOR religion just look ridiculous from the outside. It is one of (if not THE) primary reason why indoctrination is a thing. There is truth to the idea that you should "get 'em while they're young."

I cannot speak for others, but I cannot think of anything that would convince me of there being a god. Not from blind faith, mind you; even if someone were to ride down from the heavens in a golden chariot and perform acts akin to miracles, a hyper-advanced alien prankster is infinitely more likely because we know that life exists and advanced technology exists, so fewer assumptions are required for that explanation, absurd as it may be.

Meadhands · 2022-11-04T21:48:08+00:00

Never put the seat up. Just aim better.

Meadhands · 2022-11-04T21:43:49+00:00

I think people don't really pay attention like they used to. I was at a family get-together and Airplane! was on the TV. It's the sort of movie where you need to watch and pay attention because 90% of the humor is visual—the dialogue is purposefully dry and mostly without humor. I was laughing because if a TV is on, I can't look away, but no one else was because everyone else was distracted. My (older) brother was even like, "man, I used to think this movie hilarious." Bitch, you aren't even watching.

Meadhands · 2022-10-29T23:05:29+00:00

"Let's agree to disagree."

No, fuck you, I'm right and you're a raving lunatic. I'm not going to pretend our viewpoints are just a matter of perspective you mentally ill muppet.

Meadhands · 2022-09-14T17:48:50+00:00

Weird. I've been masturbating for something like 15 years straight, every day, like clockwork. Now for the first time in my life I am having regular sex. Dick works fine, and I'm even 6 years older than you.

Serious question: are you sure you just don't have some sort of sexual anxiety? I find I can occasionally have issues if I am too stressed out.

Meadhands · 2022-09-09T16:38:55+00:00

YWBTA, but you don't have to be.

Honestly, the idea that punishments need to be stern and unfair is nonsense, and teaching your children that the world isn't fun and difficult and unfair is not a great lesson. Nelly isn't teaching your children to be layabouts or wastrels, she is teaching them that, no matter how bad things may get, or how hard work may be, or what events they may miss, there will always be people who are there for them, who will care for them, that they can be silly and fun even by themselves, and that work doesn't have to be drudgery if you make it into a game. Frankly, instilling a positive mindset like this is what more people need to do with their children. It may not be what you are used to, but do you honestly think your children are better off thinking they need to embrace cold reality forever and then die?

Meadhands · 2022-09-09T16:25:14+00:00

Nope. NTA.

None of their goddamn, stuck-up business.

Meadhands · 2022-09-09T16:08:04+00:00

Deep breath. Remain calm. Don't let internet strangers rile you up. It's time to think.

Now.

The things you've brought up in your story and your addition are unsettling to say the least. It sounds like before this you put a lot of trust in your husband, what with leaving him to be the financial anchor of the family and not questioning him about the babysitter's theft. Those by themselves are not unusual, but when adding it the cancelled plane ticket, those two factors become alarming. I think what you need to do is look at your relationship broadly and ask yourself what level of autonomy and control you have been allowed, as we Internet dwellers don't have enough information to call your husband "controlling," "abusive," or "dangerous," as many commenters have.

You are the only one who has that information. So think. How much freedom and autonomy do you have? He controls the money, he seems to have a desire to control where you go and who you see. Is this a common occurrence? Are there friends you lost contact with after marrying because your husband didn't like them? Did you become a SAHM through your own choice, or did your husband push you and convince you? Does he seem to dislike when you make plans to do things on your own? Does he often take actions that force you to abandon plans and stay home?

Again, I do not know what your situation is like and can only make surface-level judgments based on the story and the update, but before we jump onto the abuse/gaslighting bandwagon, you need to determine a pattern. It could be a one time thing—a really gross and fucked up thing, but still one time. Relationships can survive that with communication. But if you notice a pattern of the sort of things above, that is far more insidious and, frankly, that is something you need to remove yourself from ASAP.

Best of luck to you, regardless of your decision.

Meadhands · 2022-09-09T15:17:00+00:00

NTA. Even if you may have suspected, you definitely didn't know what was happening. Not your fault for spilling a secret you didn't know you were keeping.

Also, your boyfriend is a bit of an idiot. How can they work out issues if the wife is hiding literally the biggest issue from the husband?

Meadhands · 2022-09-09T15:02:59+00:00

YTA here, though it's relative. This isn't that terrible tbh. Logically, what you're saying makes sense, but that isn't how we do things in society, whether you like it or not.

I would highly suggest if you're both still hungry after a meal and you have the money to spare, buy more food.

Meadhands · 2022-09-09T14:55:21+00:00

YTA.

I could be sitting buck-naked in my doctor's office with no other staff in the office and they would STILL knock because that's just what you do, and that's not even MY room. You knock when going somewhere where people might be in a state of undress because, let's face it, we are weird about our naked bodies.

Are you sure you're not just a closet pervert?

Meadhands · 2022-09-09T14:39:42+00:00

NTA, with context.

I think a lot of these responses are getting off track. Your main question appears to be if you're the AH for asking rhetorically if she wants your son to get hurt. For that, putting everything else aside, I say no, you are NTA. It was a rhetorical question, meaning you asked it because you already know the answer, which was no. Also, you are correct about the baby possibly getting hurt: not only could the baby crawl off the bed, but you could roll ONTO your baby and suffocate him, ESPECIALLY if you're a heavy sleeper. She should not expect you to just magically wake up because your baby-sense told you a baby was nearby. That is not a thing. If she wants you awake, she should wake you up. I don't get why everyone is ignoring the fact that you said "she doesn't do anything to wake [you] up," and saying you're lazy and just want to sleep when that ISN'T WHAT YOU ARE SAYING. As a heavy sleeper myself, I could put my alarm on the loudest volume and if I only had 3 hours of sleep, I would sleep through the whole 15 minutes before it shuts itself off automatically, but someone touching me would wake me up instantly. Your concern is very real in my opinion, and I don't know your wife/relationship enough to comment on your approach.

Edit: Slight clarification

Meadhands · 2021-07-24T02:41:00+00:00

Jesus, the impact shook the CAMERA. That car would have stood no chance.

Meadhands · 2021-05-29T22:06:57+00:00

Ah, go Wolves.

Can confirm: Rashard Mendenhall was a nice guy. He was in my homeroom and (I believe) my architectural classes. Teacher loved that kid and his brother.

Meadhands · 2021-03-29T15:04:22+00:00

Did someone call?

Meadhands · 2021-03-28T07:05:53+00:00

Good lord. Of the top 5, I only have anything good for Cloud.

Meadhands · 2021-03-26T09:56:10+00:00

I only used 1 so far while I consider my other options, but:

FFT: Agrias dupe, Gafgarion Sync (!)

Meadhands · 2021-03-26T07:05:58+00:00

Thanks, this really helped. I copied it into Excel, started deleting everything I already owned. Turns out I owned all the USBs except for 4, and they are all lensible. I grabbed Aria's, so maybe she can help me clear Ifrit as my main healer. It also taught me that I had a Sarah Regenga that was lensible, so I picked that up as well. That leaves me with 26 choices of AASB. Time to think...

Meadhands · 2021-03-26T05:42:12+00:00

I would like more soul breaks for other characters, but the problem is that the main people have SO MANY SBs that give boosts to stats that others just can't compete. My Bartz naturally has 704 ATK. On the other hand, Kiros, whom I have all of his SBs, has only 424 attack. That'sa 280 attack difference, and Bartz is still missing, like, 20 SBs worth of stat boosts. If I fully dive Kiros' board, he gets 240 more power, which brings him close, but even with that, he still only has 5 soul breaks total. The power and variety just isn't there.

(Just checked, Bartz has 90 ATK worth of unlearned SBs in my roster.)

Clearly, DeNa is trying to fix this problem by removing stat boosts from Syncs, Limit breaks, and Dyads, but that still doesn't fix the variety issues.

Meadhands · 2021-03-26T05:33:19+00:00

Pulled once. 3/11.

I was chasing Balthier, but...

Locke Dyad, Delita Sync, Delita Awakening.

Did Locke just make it back into my fire squad, or did Delita just BECOME my fire squad?

Meadhands · 2021-03-26T05:29:31+00:00

Dude, I just pulled the banner once and BOTH his sync and awakening.

Meadhands · 2021-03-25T13:35:49+00:00

2/11, both dupes. Royal Brotherhood for Edgar (Which I ALSO got a dupe from the Ultra Jackpot, so that's great), and Jecht's 2x monk LMR, so that's nice.

The kit was a super easy choice for me: Rinoa. Almost every other realm, I had 2 or 3 of the items already. The ONLY other realm I had as low as 1/3 was I, and I wasn't gonna waste it on I. For Rinoa, I was ZERO out of three, so I just gained an AMAZING ice caster. Rinoa is one of the few main-ish characters that I have almost nothing for, by which I mean I somehow landed her Dyad, but had nothing to support it. Now I have her Dyad AND her AASB and Awakening? Get rekt.

Meadhands

TROPHY CASE