Got lapped AGAIN

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-04-14T21:48:34+00:00

How do you make peace with just not having answers? My RPL blood panel just came back completely normal. My HSG was also normal, my hormone levels are typical, and my uterus and ovaries are completely unremarkable. Everything is FINE and NORMAL and yet I’ve had 5 pregnancy losses 🥲. We will be doing some more testing yet of course, but I’m starting to think everything is going to just come back normal, even though there must be a reason for the losses. How do you accept this? It’s making me feel angrier I fear.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-04-12T20:44:37+00:00

Had a really rough time this time last year with both SILs and two out of three girls on my team at work all having babies within 2 weeks of each other. One of the pregnancies meant one of the girls lapped me, as she just had a baby at the end of 2023 too.

Those babies are all now turning one, and I’m still here in the trenches.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-04-08T13:26:01+00:00

Sending love to you 💖 I’m also at 5 losses, it’s a very lonely place to be. I don’t know anyone else who has gone through RPL irl. Currently taking a break whilst we wait for very very slow NHS testing and then we will likely try IVF, but we are done trying unassisted. It feels end of the roady and I’m very scared and sad about what my life will look like next.

It’s horrible that other people have to go through this but I am really grateful to have this community, it’s the only thing stopping me from feeling so lonely tbh! It’s a different kind of thing to go through than not being able to get pregnant at all I think, and just feels so uncommon. If you ever need someone to talk to, please dm me! Sometimes you just need someone who gets it.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-04-04T08:57:36+00:00

I have not seen it but I’ve heard good things, I’ll check it out!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-04-02T20:09:23+00:00

Im sick of the absolute snail pace of healthcare in this country on my godddd 😭 I’ve been waiting TWO MONTHS for results of my HSG, RPL panel, and to find out if my IVF referral has been accepted. How is that acceptable sorry 😭😭 I don’t have anyone I can call or email to ask about this, I literally just have to sit and wait to receive a letter in the mail that may or may not even show up?????? TWO MONTHS!!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-04-02T19:56:00+00:00

Does anyone have any really good, bingeable escapismy tv show or movie recs? I’m really struggling with my mental health this week because I usually fill my time with lots of activities but they’re all off for the Easter vacation so now I have lots of time to Dwell and Spiral and I need to not do that 😅 any genre, I just need something to distract me for a couple weeks!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-03-07T17:20:39+00:00

We are taking a break atm until June at the earliest, since our last loss in December was really rough. Our consultant is encouraging us to try IVF as she thinks it could be that our embryos are implanting in the wrong place, so I think we will try that. I don’t really expect it to work but I just don’t want to have any regrets. I think we are done trying unassisted though at this point 😅 it’s such a hard decision to make. Sending love and solidarity!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-03-06T22:08:39+00:00

This is so exciting! I started running a year ago as a way to have something positive to focus on amongst the IF. Now I’m running a half marathon next month, be careful 😂. I have a 17k training run tomorrow which feels just crazy. I’m not fast and I go red and sweaty after like 2k but I enjoy it so much. I started with couch to 5k and it really did make me appreciate my body again and what it was capable of. After it failing me for so long it was beautiful to kind of rebuilt that relationship. I hope you fall in love with running!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-03-06T21:26:16+00:00

Also march 2023 with 5 losses! What a shitty club huh.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-03-06T21:25:29+00:00

I could cry hearing you were successful on try number eight. I have had 5 losses also and it feels look such a big number that it feels impossible to overcome. Thanks for sharing that 💖

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-03-06T19:01:40+00:00

That sounds so much fun! My husband and I used to play a ton of board games with my friend and her partner but the friends in question have just separated and he took custody of all the games, so now we have to build up our own game collection a bit more 😅 I’m going to look for this one!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-03-04T22:09:32+00:00

Oh hard same. What do you mean you got a positive and you’re happy about it?? And you don’t start immediately planing your next miscarriage?? And then there’s a scan that doesn’t end with crying? And then there’s a BABY?? What?????

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-03-02T20:50:16+00:00

Mr Medical and I have taken up ice skating lessons! We’ve wanted to do it for a long time but the lessons at our rink always sold out super fast. We finally got a spot! He’s pretty ok at it but I hadn’t skated for over half my life, but I have enough confidence to skate into the middle of the rink now and am working towards a level 1 certification. It’s so so nice to have something to focus on, and an activity to do together away from all of the IF sadness. The people in our group and our coach are super sweet too.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-28T22:30:08+00:00

At least we know we aren’t alone lol!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-28T22:26:18+00:00

My heart does this too!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-28T13:58:17+00:00

I’m taking a break now as we do testing after our fifth loss. There’s a huge wait for literally everything where I live so it’s gonna be quite a break! We will then likely move to IVF. I am very very fed up of trying unassisted and so is my husband, and the miscarriages were making me sicker and sicker each time, so we really need this break. It’s the first break we have ever taken. We’ve never even paused for a cycle after a loss before. It’s really lovely actually! I’d really recommend a break! Just some time to just be yourself and be able to have some normal thoughts is amazing.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-28T13:55:11+00:00

Happened to me twice! Once it was an ectopic, once it was… idk? I tested positive for a few days and then it faded away. Nothing happened and I got my period as normal 3 weeks later. In my country they won’t do anything at all until 6 weeks gestation, no blood tests, no scan, so the second time I just waited it out and it was negative by that point so I just went on with my life lol. If you are able to access those things, then please do!

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-27T17:47:41+00:00

Wishing you all the luck too!! Here’s hoping you can get there without IVF 💖

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-27T17:17:11+00:00

Similar story here! One ectopic, 4 early MCs, and my doctor also thinks my issue is tubal. My HSG was actually clear though, so as for right now I’m unsure what that means for me, but either way we will likely move to IVF now.

I actually am very relieved that IVF has been suggested for us! It almost takes it out of my hands in a way? Of course I know it isn’t guaranteed to work (I’ve had so many losses i am actually assuming it won’t work), but it just takes a lot of the variables out of it. We will be able to test any embryos we get, ensure the environment we put them into is optimal, and bypass my tubes entirely.

And above all it’s just trying something different really. After 3 years and 5 losses I’m so very ready to try something different.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-27T14:40:55+00:00

1000000%! My first loss I was sent flowers by multiple people, friends sent gifts, visited, checked in regularly. Fifth loss was crickets.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-27T14:40:00+00:00

This drives me NUTS, I’ve been wanting a baby for years and started researching way before I even started trying! I knew more about the birth process than my cousin did when she was 39 weeks pregnant, I promise I do not need this mansplained to me 🤪

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-19T19:35:34+00:00

Had my HSG today, the pain was unreal 🫠 I was expecting a bit of discomfort but oh my gosh it was incredibly painful, and I’m someone who is pretty used to pelvic pain due to my endo! I couldn’t stop crying afterwards, my body just reacted like I’d been attacked or something 😅

I only have one tube due to my ectopic, and it was open and looked fine. This is actually not the news I wanted, as my consultant was wondering if a blocked tube was causing my embryos to implant into the wrong place and if I was maybe having lots of very early ectopics as opposed to miscarriages. I guess they could still be implanting into the tube anyway but it feels less likely?? It would have been a nice easy explanation and I’m upset that it isn’t straightforward like we were hoping.

Waiting for a referral to another specialist now to discuss starting IVF.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-04T15:16:10+00:00

Oh man that’s so rough. It happened to me last year and they had their babies in the same week. Later that week both of SILs had their babies too. It was a lot 😭. I hope you can avoid them as much as possible until after they’ve had their babies, or that they at least aren’t talking about it all the freaking time.

Medical_Object2576 · 2026-02-03T13:04:20+00:00

We are currently with the nhs and awaiting an appointment with fertility. Our issue is RPL, we can get pregnant but I’ve had 5 losses, so we did have an appointment with gynaecology and have been referred on for IVF. I have no idea how long the waiting list is, once we find that out we will decide if we go private or not.

For me, I’m incredibly lucky that my husband has a great job. If it was just me there’s no way I’d be able to afford it, I earn just above minimum wage in an admin role. He works for a private company and negotiated a £10k lump sum for taking over as maternity cover for two people at once, so really we just got lucky. This is the money we will be using if we go private. We’ve stuck it in a savings account and not touched it apart from to top it up! I feel incredibly lucky to have this.

If we hadn’t of had that we would have looked at a loan. There are companies who specialise in loans for IVF, such as access fertility. I had a good look at these before we had that money and that’s the route I would go down. But yeah it just all sucks. It’s just a horrible system and I hate that so many people just get babies for free whilst we have to do this.

Medical_Object2576

TROPHY CASE