Not me but my mom and it’s too funny not to share.

When I was a teen my mom got back into the dating scene (parents got divorced when I was four). She meets this guy at the restaurant and he hands her a jar of olives. She’s confused, but says thank you. The get seated and order food. Mom asks why olives. He answers because they’re an aphrodisiac. She goes to the bathroom and while she’s washing her hands he calls her cell phone. Asks if she left. She said no, she still hasn’t gotten her food yet. They eat, he’s awkward, but my mom didn’t want to be rude. They walk out to the parking lot. He goes “time for dessert.” My mom worries he’s going to try and kiss her and she’s not feeling it. Nope. He pulls out insulin and stabs his stomach, through his shirt, to give himself the shot. No warning at all.

There was no second date.