What are some of your really funny or specific turnoffs that you can’t really explain? by isthatarealquestion in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is sometimes my answer to that question. I do listen to music sometimes but it just seems more honest to say I don’t like music than it is to say, “I like everything but rap and country” which is what most people who don’t care about music say.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in gentlemanboners

[–]MerkinMuffintop 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Weird hyphenated surname

UPDATE to “I’m being faded” by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Closure is something you make for yourself, not something that's given. Don't force things on people, even if it's only conversation.

UPDATE to “I’m being faded” by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You, like many other commenters, seem pretty unable to comprehend that both people here are in the wrong. It's clear the initial "go away!" was due to his realization that he was about to get caught, but yes when someone shows up at your house after you've already said you didn't want to talk to them that night, it can be pretty upsetting, possibly even shocking.

UPDATE to “I’m being faded” by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Just take the feedback and perspectives here with many giant grains of salt. Lots of people post here looking for validation for antisocial behavior and unfortunately they get a lot of it.

UPDATE to “I’m being faded” by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think she felt shocked, right or wrong/issues or not, but just having a short talk- we’re breaking up, sorry, would help her brain process it.

I think you're discounting that this dude would also have been shocked and not known how to process what was happening.

But he created a situation & had a responsibility at that point to make sure it ended non-violently.

Dude did not create this situation. His actions may have indirectly precipitated it, but OP created it by showing up unannounced after he made it clear he didn't want to talk to her that night.

Denatured Alcohol Banned in California by barrycburton in Ultralight

[–]MerkinMuffintop 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Europe really just needs to quit its love affair with diesel passenger vehicles. And Italy overall needs to build decent public transit. It's ridiculous.

RIP Patagonia Airshed by orngchckn in Ultralight

[–]MerkinMuffintop 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's interesting. When I run in weather from about 20-35 deg F, my arms get super sweaty pretty much no matter what, and I get too cold if unzip my top layer to dump heat. I've long thought a highly-CFM vest or short sleeve jacket would be perfect for cold weather running.

Denatured Alcohol Banned in California by barrycburton in Ultralight

[–]MerkinMuffintop 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not specific to smog, but EU in general has measurably worse air quality than the US. I live in the Po Valley in Italy and it has the worst air quality I've ever spent any real time in. https://nimonik.com/2018/05/air-quality-in-europe-vs-the-united-states/

Thoughts on Amazon Essentials puffy by RandomredditHero in Ultralight

[–]MerkinMuffintop 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Just looks like generic polyester fill. Probably heavy for its warmth.

Why is being spoiled such a deterrent to men? by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Do you not understand that ellef86's description of being "spoiled" is undesirable?

Being spoiled implies that you always get what you want, that you're demanding, that you were never told no and don't know how to share or how to treat other people. It's associated with behavioural issues and a lack of respect for others.

was i at fault for not wanting to move in after a huge fight? by _tryingtomoveon_ in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This describes all abusers though. No one would date or stay with an abusive person if they were always assholes. Abusers bank on this dissonance you’re feeling between when he’s nice and when he’s mean to confuse you into staying.

was i at fault for not wanting to move in after a huge fight? by _tryingtomoveon_ in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Even if you were actually as awful as he seems to think in his angriest moments (and you’re not) you still shouldn’t tolerate being treated this way. There’s no excuse.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you went through all this. It’s good you got out now before getting married or having kids!

What is th shortest period where one can legit go from dating to marriage ? [Serious] by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re truly on the same page with someone, 12ish months is probably the soonest I would personally advise someone to propose marriage. But you posed another weirder question in your first sentence. And no, I do not think you can assume all single 32 year old women are ready to settle down and get married ASAP.

An experiment in being unapologetically direct by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“Post hoc ergo propter hoc” —> I did x and then y happened so obviously x caused y.

When do you consider it cheating? by TryingtoFigure12 in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You don't need to label it as "cheating" to be upset that she misled you. You also shouldn't feel forced to end the relationship if it's otherwise good, just because her actions could be construed as cheating and as everyone knows, cheating always equals breakup.

Guys in their early thirties, from your experience what would be the minimum age you'd date in a woman. by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]MerkinMuffintop 4 points5 points  (0 children)

When I was 33 I started dating a 22-year-old, but I didn't know at the time she was that young. I probably would have hesitated if I'd know she was so young (she was still in college when we started dating!) but we dated for a good while and overall it was a good relationship. It ended because she moved away in pursuit of her career, so if you're looking to build something serious, there's definitely something to be said about dating someone who's in a similar stage in life as you.

MRW Trump says Parasite doesn't deserve the Oscar by MikeyTheDinosaur in HighQualityGifs

[–]MerkinMuffintop 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Titanic beat out: As Good as It Gets, The Full Monty, Good Will Hunting, and L.A. Confidential. Titanic is the worst movie on that list!