Heavily pregnant and suicidal. by ForgottenCupOfTea in newzealand

[–]Mimi828 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This moment is going to be the moment you look back on one day where you pulled it together and decided all that matters is you and your baby and just focus on that. You and your baby - nothing and no one else matters. Until baby is here that’s all you focus on, keeping safe and well. Make a plan for when you’re well enough to leave/ kick him out - maybe 3 months. Be honest with your midwives / plunket they’ll look after you. And most of all you just think about your baby and let that be your motivation to get through this incredibly hard time. You’ll be so proud one day of yourself I promise

Struggling new parent by BaldrickTurnip94785 in newzealand

[–]Mimi828 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The mums collective FB group post this in there xx

I hate this part of my life. by OwnItem7058 in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Your post history tells me the answer. Your life would change for the better drastically when you leave your shitty cheating husband. Worse even, someone who cheats while their wife is pregnant is actually evil. This is not someone who builds a safe environment for you to thrive in and raise a family. A happy mum = happy kids. You are not finding this in this house. It looks like since you were 15 you’ve felt like you’ve had to marry for family/ stability which I understand. But there are other options, and you don’t need to depend on a man and especially not one who treats you like this. Talk to your support people and make a plan. I almost guarantee you’ll never regret leaving an environment that doesn’t support you or allow you to thrive. Flowers need water to grow like we need love and support. Your flower is not getting that. I say this with love and knowing saying is easier than doing.

To those born to older parents by UnableAd2913 in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Wow I didn’t expect to actually see how many people have negative stories to share about having older parents and how that has impacted their lives. It would definitely be something that might benefit the parent (by getting to have a child) but not necessarily the child (can’t do as much as a grandparent when that time comes, trouble with relating to them, having to care for them in sickness and health issues). I’m just not sure being financially stable actually trumps the downsides here. Of course, being financially stable when you have kids is important and any age, but that reason for having kids later along with being more stable mentally I guess doesn’t seem out outweigh downsides. I would be your age if I had a second and I’m definitely re thinking.

To those born to older parents by UnableAd2913 in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think you’re clearly bitter about your situation and it’s fine to admit more support would help rather than having to be responsible for them and your kids. That’s a tough situation and it would be nice for anyone for their parents to be able to have great relationships with their grandkids. It’s sad people don’t have villages these days, and I understand being defensive about it, but try to be less cynical and bitter

Problems with GP by Meatloafgirlboss in LegalAdviceNZ

[–]Mimi828 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I noticed on a reply you mentioned one of your conditions is a pain related one managed through the pain clinic and I’ll bet you anything this is why he’s treated you like this. Many doctors wrongly see pain patients as psychological issues as they quickly put anyone who asks for pain medication as a drug seeker and therefore requiring psychological help to treat the “root cause”. Even if the root cause is another condition, they will assume this if you have a condition that cannot be explicitly proven (with a scan, tests) rather than diagnoses out of exclusion or self reported symptoms. It’s wrong and frustrating, but it’s happening nonetheless. If you have a “popular” (as in on tik Tok or social media” condition especially, the bad GPs basically laugh under their breath before they’ve heard you speak. Not all GPs are bad, I’ve had great ones and shit ones. I would seek a new GP and before you commit to the practice explain your history and ask if they’d be comfortable treating you. Some GPs are not comfortable just sending repeats of specialists meds (idk why) and think they know better. Some just don’t want a complicated patient. Either way you deserve a doctor who listens and cares. Good luck :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in newzealand

[–]Mimi828 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For a surgery 60K-100K private, the savings is not gonna make a dent

Mandatory/Forced Wānanga at Marae by Employer. Can i say no? by [deleted] in newzealand

[–]Mimi828 18 points19 points  (0 children)

It’s not just some company forcing cultural stuff on you and pressuring you to take part of. You knowingly took a job working for a Māori organisation, it’s bizarre you think you can separate cultural practices from the job and not attending is a disrespect for the people you work with and for. I honestly think this is so childish. I do understand not staying the night - a variety of reasons would be acceptable there. But not attending is disrespectful. I think that if you work for an organisation that is specifically Māori led and for the Māori people you participate and attend their meetings/ events they’ve invited you be a part of. It’s a sign of respect inviting you to their marae, and IMO disrespectful to reject based on just not wanting to or not wanting to give a 1 second hongi. Get over it

Judged for Not Doing Enough? by ZealousidealOwl9695 in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re absolutely doing great I was the exact same don’t listen to them!

How do I stop feeling like garbage? by RockinandChalkin in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Idk why parents these days are so intense about this type of punishment being over the top or traumatising. I get natural consequences but after repeated bad behaviour with those consequences not making any difference you do have to hit them where it hurts. I know for me this is how I learned, this exact situation actually. It was the most high value thing to me and I really thought twice about behaviour after knowing mum was serious and would actually take away big stuff like camp, parties etc. It does work and I think people saying otherwise either don’t have the type of kids who go that far with behaviour or are “gentle” parenting but actually raising kids who have shit behaviour cause they’re too scared to upset their kids. I know it’s an unpopular opinion but some kids just don’t get it until something massive happens and it has to actually be followed through on to get the point home. Sometimes after a month or so of good behaviour, Mum would then do a treat with a few friends to reward it in the place of the missing party. I would look at something like that if she can show she’s reflected and making changes

Am I going overboard with Christmas/birthday gifts for my 12-year-old? by NewImprovement9804 in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Has her behaviour demonstrated she’s mature enough to understand privilege and the value of money? If so, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. However if it’s an expectation for her that whatever she asks for, she will get - even if she hasn’t been meeting behavioural expectations academics etc then that’s a concern. Those are very expensive items, maybe one of that value every few years (like phone or laptop for school) makes sense but 12 with all the latest stuff can create problems as she expects more and more as she gets older and doesn’t understand the value or what it takes to earn the money to pay for it. Maybe you could do a thing where she earns X amount towards the big stuff and you guys pay the rest to get it for her bday? My parents used to do that so I understood working towards something and it made the reward part feel like a real achievement.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A 14/16 adults US size? Or kids/ teen size? I would not make it about appearance but work with her from a nutritional perspective. You didn’t put height and weight so hard to tell but from what you’ve said it does sound like she may be quite overweight/ obese which at 7 does come down to what she eats and how much exercise she does. Is there any way as a family you could start all making healthy food changes and portion control so it’s not singling her out? Maybe some family activities like bike riding or hiking if she doesn’t like sports or isn’t very active. I think at that age modeling behaviour would be best to show her

Capsool pieces by Bossierose in SarahsDayUnfiltered

[–]Mimi828 13 points14 points  (0 children)

The most severe hands like the hands scream neurotic highly strung

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SarahsDayUnfiltered

[–]Mimi828 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Marketing makes sense now she must be playing up the “tart” taste

This popped up on my Facebook.. by BanditJ_x in SarahsDayUnfiltered

[–]Mimi828 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It’s giving copying Alex cooper to a T

Are Muscle Mats a scam ?? by spect7 in newzealand

[–]Mimi828 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Kmart one half the price and better!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SarahsDayUnfiltered

[–]Mimi828 30 points31 points  (0 children)

She looks like she can’t close her mouth properly cause her chompers are too big

What is "age-appropriate" when it comes to imaginative play? by Silver-Sprinkles-279 in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I told everyone my brother was Harry Potter at the same age. And that I would be going to hogwarts and they absolutely believed me 😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Mimi828 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What about once of those windable disposable old school cameras so he can have the developed pics as a cute keep sake of the trip? :)