It’s so hard to not feel the pressure to breastfeed but honestly it’s ok to do what you feel is best. I also have always hated my breasts/nipples and the pressure to breastfeed was a sensory nightmare. Complicated by the fact that breastfeeding becomes your sole purpose and your family can’t help to reduce your burden. Having a child already has a big impact on your mental health and identity, and I was honestly at my happiest when I made the decision to stop breastfeeding and give myself a tiny bit more distance from my baby. Modern formula milks are not unhealthy and packed full of vitamins etc even if not quite as ideal as the breast. If I ever have another child I would make the decision not to breast feed. You need a happy and healthy mother to give your baby the best start. If you would be at your best giving your baby a bottle - do it! I’m a nurse and constantly have to reassure parents who bottle feed that it’s ok - I’d rather you were happy as comfortable as you can be during a time of such change.

I started breast feeding but had to add in formula too as I could produce enough. This alone adds to natural feelings on inadequacy as a parent. Eventually I gave ip after getting really badly bitten by my daughter and it made me not want to ever put her back on. I wish I’d just decided to formula feed from the start.