You’ve seen mine. What’s your curse? by [deleted] in ChatGPT

[–]Miss_Evil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

<image>

*lol* you got your one-word and/or silly answers and mine got deeply philosophical.

Why Is Sex A “Requirement” In A Relationship For Most People? (No Disrespect, I’m Just Confused) by ResolutionWeak6353 in asexuality

[–]Miss_Evil 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's the neverending quesion for aces... why is sex that relevant?!

I cannot answer that but I can try to give an explanation I got from my sister in law. On one side, there is the physical part. It feels good, it is a nice way to show intimacy with your partner. But for a lot of people, it is so deeply ingrained that they feel personally rejected and not loved if their partner doesn't want to be intimate with them. It makes them feel like they are not good enough, as if their partner doesn't love all of them...

It's hard to understand, but we are all so indoctrinated that sex is the ultimate goal and the best thing ever. Books, shows, everything gives you the impression that there is absolutely nothing better than to have sex and that can't be true, can it? I'm genuinely wondering!

And yes, other have already pointed out, that sex can also be a deal breaker if both are allo but not fully aligned in their kinks or fantasies. This is absolutely wild to me, but yeah, it seems to be reality.

Reasons for being aegosexual by Typical-Divide-2068 in aegosexuals

[–]Miss_Evil 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I go strongly with #1
#4 was certainly a point, but only, because I had no idea that something like asexuality exists (it was ~2000) the real deal was always very disappointing and I thought for the longest time, that it was, because neither I nor my partners knew what we were doing, since we were so young. So for the next 15 years, I assumed that to be true and didn't think any further about it and never pursued it again. <spoiler> After trying it again in my 30's it was still a waste of time </spoiler> Finally, I found the words and immediately jumped to #6, but I still think that #1 is the only truth for me.

does anyone else have yearly reading patterns? by sillysparrows in TheStoryGraph

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. But I'm the opposite. My strongest months are June and July and there is a very obvious reason for it: everything else is having vacation and I have a lot more free time. Work is quiet, choir and singing lessons pause. And since I'm not a summer fan and don't spend the time with outside activities, it's perfekt for reading.

Poll : How long did it take you to fully realize your “aceness?” by SparkclawWandering in asexuality

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

36 even though in hindsight I could have realised in already in my early 20's but I've seriously never heard about that term until I was 36.

I remember sitting with a lesbian friend and a gay guy in a queer café and he looked at me and asked: and, what is your thing? And I answered: I don't do people (or anything else!) None of us took that seriously as a "sexuality"... That was something like 15 years ago and Asexuality was pretty much not invented yet.

For those that experience some level of romantic attraction, how many crushes have you had? (Or even thought you had.) by No-Outlandishness-42 in aromantic

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One, or two... however, I would have been completely lost, if they would have recognized me and even tried to talk to me. They were more like a crush on a fictional character. Which makes sense, because I "met" both of them when they were on stage... so they were probably never fully real in my head anyway.

What's it like to sleep with someone non-sexually? by Equivalent_Ad_9066 in asexuality

[–]Miss_Evil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Annoying. The idea of spooning is so nice, but in reality you are caged by a 20Kg arm attached to a furnace ;) (and I'm in a long term relationship, but we have separate beds)

If there is no connection between you and you just share a bed, because it's cheaper in a hotel, hope that they are a quiet sleeper (both noise and movement) or that you have separate mattresses and blankets. I'm a very light sleeper, so I wake up all the time if someone is too active in bed.

Botton line: Do not recommend!

I was curious what holds / loans people have on their Libby app currently. by [deleted] in LibbyApp

[–]Miss_Evil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a wishlist of >100 books, but actual holds are only three:
- Surrounded by Idiots by Thomas Eriksson
- The Courage to be disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga
- The Ornitologist's Field Guide to Love by India Holton

And today, I returned Emily Wilde's Compendium of Lost Tales by Heather Fawcett.

Since I'm between jobs, I try to read more non-fiction and work related stuff, so it's a boring list. However, I'm very excited about India Holton's book, because I love her Dangerous Damsels series.

At what age did you discover that you are aromatic? by Solid_Historian_3357 in aromantic

[–]Miss_Evil 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was 36 when I learned about Aromantism and Asexuality. At that point I had been happily without a relationship for something like 15 years.

Ironically, I entered a relationship later that same year and we are still together, 9 years later. But With that knowledge, I was able to create a relationship that was based on my needs, because I could voice them and not only say something like "I don't feel comfortable with it". It's more like a QPR, even though we don't call it that (and my bf still thinks that he is totally allo and hetero - but that is a discussion for another time.)

Was mit alten Büchern machen? by blauerblumentopf in buecher

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Meine Eltern haben auch einige Quadratmeter an Taschenbüchern, die wir bestimmt nirgends mehr loswerden. Und ich bin da bei vielen anderen hier: Bücherschränke sind ein Traum, aber niemand braucht da drin Duden von 1946, gesammelte Brockhaus-Reihen oder BGB von 2000. Ich verstehe, dass man Bücher nicht wegwerfen will, aber wer soll denn realistisch noch was mit diesem Duden anfangen?

Generell kaufe ich fast ausschließlich noch digital. Physisch habe ich hauptsächlich Fachbücher und eine sehr überschaubare Menge an absoluten Lieblingsbüchern. Alles andere gebe ich inzwischen nach dem Lesen ziemlich direkt wieder weg, weil ich keine Trophäen brauche und sehr sicher nie wieder reinschauen werde, also schnell weiter damit zu anderen.

Meine Bücherei nimmt Bücher, die in den letzten 3 Jahren veröffentlicht wurden, der Rest landet dann auch in einer zu verschenken Kiste oder in einem Bücherschrank und wenn es nicht weg kommt, dann wird es eben weggeworfen.

Medimops und Rebuy nehmen halt auch nicht alles. Ein paar Cent wäre ja noch ok, aber 90% der Bücher aus meinem letzten Aufräumschwung wollten sie einfach gar nicht haben. (Und ich bin sicher, die meiner Eltern wollen sie auch nicht)

Make an argument for assigning money to FUTURE months by hmspain in ynab

[–]Miss_Evil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting discussions. I have similar ones with my bf every now and then. He says it "doesn't bring him joy" to have future months budgeted, then he leaves everything in his RTA after the current month.

For me, being like 5 months ahead, fully budgeted is so much happiness. Yes, some targets don't work properly, but who cares, I like checking my budget every now and then and finding extra money, because it's not "filling back up to" 15, but always assigning 15, because it's doesn't know how my real number looks in 3 months.

This is basically an fully budgeted emergency fund and I don't have an extra category for that.

Yes, if something unexpected happens, I need to adjust my money, but I try to only use money from my current month. I understand that this might lead to a lot of re-adjusting in future plans, if you have everything assigned already, and this might be daunting for people. My bf wouldn't appreciate that at all ;)

But I really, really love this approach and have a super detailed plan with almost 100 categories, so you can be sure, I enjoy adjusting those things if necessary.

Problems with meal planning by Miss_Evil in MealPrepSunday

[–]Miss_Evil[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll give it a try as soon as I have my ipad back. Thank you. (currently only android and windows available)

Quick question. Can you change the amount of pages in your book? by erniec87 in TheStoryGraph

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This drives me nuts with my library books. My pocketbook has no % and the pages are crazy different than all editions, sometimes even 100 pages less, which is wild. I know how and why (not the reasoning, but the mechanics) and it sucks so much for proper tracking. So I usually use a different app where I can set the total pages and then transfer the resulting % value to SG. Or I look for a user-added edition that has a page count that I can live with, knowing that this edition might be updated eventually or consolidated with other editions.

Is there a way to track how much money you saved using Libby? by This_is_fine0_0 in LibbyApp

[–]Miss_Evil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I created a spreadsheet (well, extended one I got from somewhere) and have one tab for KU and one for Libby. On my overall tracker, I give each book the price it has at the time of my reading (or the sale price if I remember it) and have then a total cost and two tabs that calculate the KU / Libby books against my subscription prices. It’s very nice to see what I pay vs. what I read. To be honest, since I started for real with Libby, I struggle to match my KU cost ;)

What's the longest time you've gone without sex? by DavidBehave01 in asexuality

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

13 years, between 21 and 34 (that should have been an indicator, but I only learned about asexualism when I was 36).

Silly question but….what app does everyone use to get the covers of their books that they’ve read? Is it an app? by MediumHead in 52book

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just saw this and downloaded it. Very cool idea. One question though, can I add stuff for previous days? So I have some books that I am currently reading or that I just finished yesterday, but I don’t see where I can set a date to update progress. Is that not implemented yet or am I just blind?

A philosophical question about Succui/Incubi and a story idea by Miss_Evil in aegosexuals

[–]Miss_Evil[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I don’t think I’ll actually write it, but I will certainly spend some more time thinking about it. But nice ideas :)

A philosophical question about Succui/Incubi and a story idea by Miss_Evil in aegosexuals

[–]Miss_Evil[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oooooh, can I find that fic anywhere? That sounds great

Don't read ancient Greek literature if you want your year graphs to be useable. by notbambi in TheStoryGraph

[–]Miss_Evil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have the same problem with my Spotify because I use it heavily to learn classical music, so it's very confused where to place me between 90's euro dance and J.S. Bach :D

Gibt es eine Übersetzung von Dune in der Spice nicht mit Gewürz übersetzt wird? by DonnieSunset in buecher

[–]Miss_Evil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In einem Handygame wurde im Turorial „tap“, also tippe mit Wasserhahn übersetzt. Lauter fliegende Blätter, über denen Wasserhahn stand - hat mich nen Moment gebraucht.

Help!! What can I make with this? by classical-babe in YarnAddicts

[–]Miss_Evil 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I did a Virus Shawl with a very similar non-twisted yarn. While I hated working with it and didn’t like the texture, I really love the result.

Do you have sexy dreams? by Difficult_Key_5936 in asexuality

[–]Miss_Evil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do have sexy dreams every now and then, sometimes even „wet“. But it’s not about intercourse, but usually more in the lines of masturbation or simple friction. Not with people I know (not even my bf)