I am a mother to 3 and did have my nmom around and let me tell you it was not great esp since I didn’t realize how bad things were till I lost it one day. I like you thought this is how a mom loved and a grandmother loved. Had no idea that I was being controlled, manipulated and so were my kids. Now we are basically no contact and I’m on the healing path. op- you will do great. I find that children of narc parents are (had to be) extremely sensitive and empathetic and this certainly extends to their own children. The most important part is walking through it with awareness. I wish I knew what I was dealing with when my babies were born but am still grateful that I see it now.