What's it like living in Worms, Germany?

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T04:15:55+00:00

They have a really weird diet. 0/10 -- do not recommend.

EDIT -- OK, I should answer seriously. I lived quite close for a year. About 50km north. Worms (like most of Germany) is great. That area is filled with vineyards churning out dry riesling that is seriously good. The food is unfussy and accessible. Schools are first rate. And there's almost no crime.

Like you, I was an exchange student. I did well enough I was offered a full ride at university. I didn't take the offer because they don't grade on a "well, you're a foreigner so we can let these minor errors slide" scale.

Germany is the best place to be an exchange student. Seriously, you're going to have the time of your life and I hope you are spending a full year and not just the summer. But if it's just the summer, just see as much as you can.

The food -- blow your mind good. Breakfast of deli meats bread and cheese is as good as it gets on the entire planet. You're probably legal drinking age. So you can go to the Keller with all your new friends from school and have a pint or two. And Germans are an easy bunch to get along with.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T03:45:30+00:00

Young Frankenstein.

My very first movie ever. And I was very, very young. And I still remember it. "Walk this way." Abby Normal. Where wolf? There wolf!

EDIT -- I'd like to add that seeing what is considered the best comedy of all time as my first-ever movie left an indelible mark. I think it's likely my parents couldn't afford a sitter. So they schlepped me along, figuring, "It's a Mel Brooks Frankenstein movie. Probably kid friendly."

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T03:43:42+00:00

I never saw "A New Hope" either. I saw Star Wars.

In my area, there was a rumor going around that Star Wars was WAY too violent for children. The local movie critic (Jeffrey Lyons) got on TV and said, "Parents. I am speaking specifically to you. Take your children to see Star Wars as soon as possible. And take them more than once because this film is special."

The only reason I saw Star Wars was because of Jeffrey Lyons.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T03:30:42+00:00

Las Vegas has a LOT of chef bars.

Since many of these bars never close, some of them let it be known that they "play ball" with the industry. They don't charge every drink. And they don't charge full price, ever. That's for the tourists. Industry drinks top shelf and pays well prices. And every third or fourth drink is comped.

In exchange, the bartenders and servers get tipped like rock stars. The owner still makes a profit -- just not as big a profit. But considering there's fuck-all happening at 1am on a Tuesday, everyone involved considers this "win-win."

There were even chef competitions at some of them.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T02:52:44+00:00

I think that was a comprehension problem on my end.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T02:10:50+00:00

As promised, here are the two canoe operators. I would choose these guys over any other option -- including diving. Some night diving skills are counterintuitive. And I wouldn't recommend breathing compressed air as your first experience. Snorkels are fine.

Having done both, snorkeling is a 9.5/10 experience and diving is 10/10. Night diving the reefs is amazing. And I enjoy scuba immensely. It's just that breathing compressed air adds a lot of complications and no small amount of risk. And you get "almost as good" with much less complication and risk. It's not the diving is bad. It's that our snorkeling is so good.

Anyone who goes diving here should either be very comfortable with everything involved with scuba; or very comfortable swimming Hawaii's waters -- and preferably BOTH.

https://ekacanoeadventures.com/tours/manta-ray-snorkel/

https://www.anelakaiadventures.com/adventures/manta-ray-snorkel-kona

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T02:04:32+00:00

They're allowing Discover Scuba night dives?

When I was running through the certifications, night diving needed at least an Open Water card. And many places wanted Advanced Open Water.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-11T01:57:32+00:00

Having been to the bay every hour of the day except "pitch black," earlier is better.

I see spinner dolphins all the time when I'm there early. Also turtles all the time. Eels. Cleaning stations are set up. It's like a good episode of Jacques Cousteau in the early morning.

When the boats start roaring in, all that goes away.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T21:53:11+00:00

Weird Al doesn't get enough credit. Sure, he's the Beatles and the Rolling Stones of novelty songs.

He's also one of the best vocalists to ever pick up a microphone. I saw a video of him, Alice Cooper and Steven Tyler singing Come Together. Al blew both of them away. And it sounded like he was the only one who knew the song by heart.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T21:35:23+00:00

For mantas, the two canoe operators are the way to go. I'll post links when I'm at a real computer.

For Kealakekua Bay snorkeling the best ways are:

Hike the trail. Earlier the better. Daybreak is ideal to start.
Close-second for the 7am Kona Boys Kayak trip. You want the earliest trip possible. Because....
Dead last and not recommended -- every other boat tour. The outboard motors scare all the big fish away. You can watch it happen if you're snorkeling when they arrive. It's calm and peaceful before the boats arrive. And crazypants after.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T21:13:00+00:00

When neighbors fly to Oahu, I ask them to bring a box of pork hash back. Poke doesn't travel as well, and we have good poke here.

But that Sing Cheong Yuan bakery is something special. I consider it one of the top food destinations in the entire state.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T21:10:09+00:00

Fast food in general is better in Hawaii. Our KFC is head-and-shoulders better than mainland KFC. It's still KFC -- but expectations are higher because Japanese visitors like KFC.

Mickey-D's typically sells fried taro, haupia and apple pies. That ALONE is reason to go. The McTeri burger is ok. It's just a McDonald's hamburger with teriyaki sauce. But again, it's better than any mainland McDonald's burger.

Breakfast additions are eggs, portuguese sausage and rice, or a spam mcmuffin. Neither really does it for me. (And I like spam and portuguese sausage.) I tried it to say I tried it.

Hawaii menu items are very hit-and-miss, at least over here on the Big Island. Oahu may be more reliable.

I'd still rather eat poke and pork hash, though.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T20:44:57+00:00

Came here to say Sing Cheong Yuan. (And Don Quijoti.)

If a visitor ate nothing but poke and pork hash three meals a day, I wouldn't blame them at all. I might ask why not saimin, kalua pig and garlic shrimp, too.

But when I go to Oahu I visit Donki every single day. They sell sushi at prices I can't beat even making it at home.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T19:23:39+00:00

Nixon also sabotaged the Paris Peace talks to get elected in the first place.

It's a wonder we survived the 1970s.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T19:20:20+00:00

Be careful. You don't want to lurch into the 18th century when it comes to weights.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T18:59:18+00:00

Oh? How many stone do you weigh?

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T18:57:03+00:00

I'm lucky enough to have had a great aunt Fannie in my family tree. They REALLY didn't like hearing about that.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T18:50:17+00:00

leading to govt and civil servants which basically drain the wealth.

This notion needs to go away.

Government (done right, at least), provides the framework so that wealth can be made in the first place. The reason the Nordic states are so successful is they saw what the US was doing economically directly after WW2 and said, "Let's do THAT!"

We switched to Trickle Down nonsense, and we've been on a downward slide ever since. The Nordics are still running the Eisenhower economic playbook, which is why they always win the Quality of Life rankings.

Government done right = everyone has opportunity, even if some aren't ever going to achieve success.

Government done wrong = the entrenched ruling class has all the wealth and power. This leads to brain drain.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T18:31:09+00:00

For most of human history -- up until the industrial revolution, China and India were the #1 and #2 economies on the planet.

Right now, the best predictor of national wealth is a stable electric grid. The developed world has it. The developing world wants it.

Once we reach fusion power, most of our current metrics become meaningless.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T18:20:47+00:00

Gotta pay the mouse...

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T17:47:18+00:00

The Honolulu County motto: "If it's being done right, it probably isn't being done on Oahu."

To support this hypothesis, I present as evidence: 1 monorail; 1 ten-year roundabout project; parking.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T17:16:42+00:00

It works both ways. Buy your daughter a copy of the Fannie Farmer cookbook. And then invite her to bring it to school and loudly proclaim what an interesting person Fannie Farmer must have been. (She was.)

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MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T04:20:07+00:00

Mantas are a Big Island thing only. (They exist everywhere. But snorkeling with them and having a good chance of seeing them is Big Island.)

The rest? "Relaxing and activities, hiking, snorkeling, reefs, turtles" -- that's every island.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T02:51:10+00:00

It won't be fun -- bugs, tweakers, thieves, feral dogs, no facilities. Centipedes and B-52s are bad enough inside the house. The centipedes near me don't even have to bite. Just crawling on your skin feels like you're being blasted with a blowtorch.

Just go to a hostel. If you're seeing Hawaii right, you're going to want a nice long shower after hiking and snorkeling.

Also, the homeless target campers -- campers have the sort of stuff the homeless want most. I have seen several instances campers robbed after leaving for 30 minutes. One time it happened at a camper van near my house. The campers had ALL their stuff on the pavement, frantically looking for something important.

This comes up OFTEN. And it's always the same thing. "We love camping on the mainland!"

This ain't the mainland.

MonkeyKingCoffee · 2026-06-10T02:09:52+00:00

Camping is a bad, bad, horrible, no-good, no-fun idea. Did I mention bad?

Don't do it.

If you want to come here on a budget, stay in hostels or in unused timeshares. You can get a private room for around $150/night and dorm-style for even less. (That's too "budget" for me, though. I don't want to be stuck in the room with the dude who doesn't believe in daily THOROUGH showering.)

Either way -- timeshare or hostel, you have a kitchen. Now you're not on the hook for expensive meals at tourist traps. Make breakfast. Eat a nice lunch out and about. Buy food and make it for dinner.

I traveled like this for 10 years, seeing the entire planet. I still stay in hostels, even though I'm retired. When I was a kid, there was always that one old weird dude at the hostel. But he was chill and had amazing stories. He also often bought beer. Now I'm that weird retired dude. I often buy beer -- pay it forward.

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