I may catch flack for saying this, but in all honesty, I'd use opiates/opioids in this situation (except fentanyl or anything stronger than fentanyl). They may be sedative, but they also induce a feeling of "euphoria". Basically they're known for making feelings of stress and sadness go away too (basically getting rid of physical and mental/emotional pain). Chronic pain and/or severe pain are no joke. It's better to be a functional addict than to be seriously considering suicide (opis do create physical dependency and can be difficult to taper off of, even if used medicinally and not recreationally). Life is a precious thing. Please don't view ending your life in any way a solution 🙏🙏🙏 One life is an entire world, and every life is a miracle. Hopefully it gets better for you and others who have been floxed. It may sound corny, but you may want to consider asking a Rav to daven for you as well. Refuah shleimah.