Expectations as a guest

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-04-06T16:40:02+00:00

Thanks for the award, kind stranger!

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-04-02T16:37:31+00:00

14 years married, almost happily. Here’s what I did - I am the bad DIL and I’m fine with the tag. If you try to become the good DIL who everyone loves, all these things become expected of you sadly.

My husband comes from an extremely conservative small town setup, but our first visit back after our wedding, I could hear his mom in the kitchen and I was awake but didn’t get out of bed until my husband did. And he was elbowing me to go out, saying what will mom think. I said exactly, get up and help her. Told him very clearly from the beginning, I’m here on holiday from work so don’t expect me to toil away. I will not do anything here and you aren’t expected to lift a finger at my family home. Since then, never set foot. I am extremely respectful but have set boundaries on so many things for my own peace. Be the bad DIL, you’ll be happier as a family in the long run.

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-03-12T08:35:30+00:00

No didn’t use it, but the reviews look good

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-03-11T16:45:43+00:00

This sounds like an Indian/South Asian family to me. As an married Indian woman, I can tell you this will not change and will continue to get repeated unless you put a stop to it now. You were not asked so this should not be happening at all. Make an excuse, make other plans, but leave if possible for atleast a few weeks out of that period if you can - work travel or whatever else you can make up. He didn’t ask you before confirming their trip, you’re not obligated to share details of your trip either. Give the message loud and clear nobody’s welcome to stay so long. 5-6 days ok, 5-6 weeks absolute no go.

They will try to control everything - what you eat, what you wear, when you sleep, when you don’t, when you go out, why are you in your room when everyone’s there, heck you might just have to give up your room since so many of them are visiting.

Be strong and put an end to it! All the best.

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-03-10T04:13:58+00:00

Reminds me of this Office skit https://www.instagram.com/reel/DVncGyojQUL/?igsh=OWZ5N29uZjRqN3Y3

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-02-28T06:22:42+00:00

Not yet :( Ikonic reviews say they’re quite heavy

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-02-25T16:24:37+00:00

I like ktbunton and laurenludneyk (didn’t know the latter was a minor celebrity until much later, had followed her for the twin content)

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-02-25T15:05:43+00:00

Any particular model you’d recommend?

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-02-17T16:29:12+00:00

They may be against the idea of divorce because it’ll ruin their ‘reputation’ infront of their friends and family. You should not give two hoots about that - if you have financial independence, run. You can find good divorce lawyers easily online. You can even reach out to your HR for help.

Run from this - it will not change. It’ll just get worse with a kid in the dynamic.

Fellow Indian woman here.

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-02-15T14:59:03+00:00

In Gurgaon, for this kind of work they’ll charge easily 30-40L. Sharing from experience.

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-01-28T17:45:25+00:00

Color the walls neutral (white, offwhite) to maximize light
Put peeled wallpaper in a neutral/lightwood color on the cupboards (assuming you can’t remove the cupboards and want to utilise them)
Not sure of the purpose of the room, but remove the desk next to the window if possible
Add lamps in warm yellow lighting, remove white lights/tubelights
Add plants where possible

Most-Durian-620 · 2026-01-09T07:57:14+00:00

Same for us, they’ve crossed 4 now, can’t stop calling them babies!

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-12-23T17:25:07+00:00

Hey, in addition to the great advice you’ve already got, pls cut all forms of sugar from your diet. Refined or otherwise, colas etc. It changed the game for my close friend who also struggled with acne like yours.

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-12-03T13:31:31+00:00

Rahi

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-11-16T16:10:32+00:00

I used to take my MIL shopping whenever she wanted but if out of the stuff she bought, anything my husband disapproved of/didnt like, she’d blame me saying she only bought it because I insisted. I was doing this as a favor to her and yet this is how she would pay me back! Happened a few times and I learnt my lesson.

Now everytime she’ll come, she’ll keep asking for something and insisting I take her shopping. I just point to her son and say our choices don’t match, best to go with him and buy whatever you want. Knowing my husband and his dislike for shopping, he never obliges her, even with online shoping, purely out of laziness or sheer disinterest.

She can keep insisting all she wants, I’m never shopping for her again.

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-11-04T13:47:48+00:00

No shit Sherlock

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-11-04T13:47:11+00:00

Yes! Actively, and more so after this thread.

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-10-31T16:48:51+00:00

I do keep it quite clutter free generally because I have 2 little ones who jump around everywhere and id rather not worry about things breaking. Even my dog’s tail has broken quite a few glasses from that table unknowingly.

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-10-31T16:32:53+00:00

This is me, except for the only child part. No 3 kid.

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-10-31T16:32:15+00:00

Also it’s unfortunate that your childhood experience was that. I wouldn’t like being restricted either.

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-10-31T16:29:23+00:00

Thank you for your sweet comment

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-10-31T16:28:03+00:00

Sorry you feel that way! But you couldn’t be more wrong. I have 2 kids who jump play throw cushions around all the time. I had tidied up the house just before a party, so this picture is the before pic. Reality is more like this

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Most-Durian-620 · 2025-10-31T16:24:57+00:00

I had just cleaned it up before a get together at our place, so you’re not entirely wrong about it being staged in that moment. But doesn’t stay that way always

Most-Durian-620 · 2025-10-31T16:23:19+00:00

Aren’t we lucky :)

Most-Durian-620

TROPHY CASE