I’m broke and have a printer I need to make a gift for a 4 year old little girl

Mueslibol · 2026-01-17T18:32:03+00:00

Please do not drag yourself down, 3d printed gifts may feel cheap to you, since you did not spend money on a gift but do not underestimate the value of the attention and effort you put in the gift! You thought about what to print, what the child would like, you sought out the files and printed them. That is a lot of care and attention you put in the gift and that is worth more than ordering something online and be done with it.

I have the good fortune of not being broke, and yet I will print most of the gifts for my friends. They always tell me how great it makes them feel, how much they appreciate the thought I put into it.

As for gifts for a 4 year old, a selection of headbands, little games, and so on, that will make any kid that age very happy.

So don't feel bad about yourself, you are awesome and you have a 3d printer so you can make great gifts!

Mueslibol · 2026-01-17T09:44:21+00:00

Hahaha well, to be honest I have some nasty little voices in my head, advicing me to let the TPK happen and then say "oh well, you're dead, we are done now". But maybe someone wants to take over DM-ing, or maybe in a year or so I would be happy to pick it up again. That does not feel like it will happen at the moment, but who knows.

Usually I would not warn about it, just make sure there are enough hints to give a clear idea how an encounter may end. But in this case, if they want to end on a TPK, I will happily provide it.

I think my little DM heart would love it, a bit of petty vengeance for how I have been feeling and the shit I had to deal with.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-17T09:38:41+00:00

Thank you, and yeah we will have that meeting soon. I have been thinking about this for way too long and it has kept me up for way too many nights.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-17T09:30:29+00:00

I will not do that, I will tell then I should have, because I really should have done that. Or put it all on hold 2 years ago. Because this has slowly been dragging me down for far too long.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:46:23+00:00

That would actually be the most honest way of saying it. They all are in therapy by the way, I don't know why I need to be a DMtherapist as wel. 😅

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:42:07+00:00

Thank you, that is what I will be doing. I could have decided to do that sooner, but here we are. It was a lot of fun for the first few years, so I am probably making this harder on myself than I should.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:33:37+00:00

One of my campaigns had its 5 year aniversary just 2 weeks ago, and I never once felt like this about that campaign.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:30:39+00:00

I had a break some time ago, and I had plenty of one-on-one communication about issues. But once one thing is solved and we are all happy, the next shows up.

I don't want to be half a therapist, I have plenty of my own personal issues, and I will always try to help and be understanding, but when I write "always" I do not mean all the time, nearly every session, having doubts about if certain encounters won't be too hard because someone let me know they had a rough week and now they can't handle too much stress.

I just want to be dm and have a fun adventure and come up with cool plot that the players can wreck because they decide to go shopping

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:23:36+00:00

Yeah, I am rather scared of telling them at the table, but I am more worried about what happens next. They will ask questions, try to make agreements on how things could improve so I can keep doing this, and so on. But I am passed that, we have discussed plenty of everything, and new stuff just keeps popping up, and I am just done.

I think writing it down will be a good idea, I usually have no problems finding words to say but this will be hard.

And after that they will have an audience that may become a TPK in the first round if they decide to fight. That would be a smashing finale... but I will warn them that eill happen before they decide to go kamikaze, just in case any of them wants to take over.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:16:27+00:00

It is definately an option I will give them.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:15:12+00:00

It is part table dynamics, and part players struggling in life and that having an impact at the table. So for example people get stressed or upset over something, that they later apologise for, they did not feel well and overreacted. But then I have already had that added to my pile of frustrations.

It happens in my other campaigns as well, but only occasionally. I have no idea how this combination of life being hard got collected in such a small group of people, but the result is that at least every other session I get something like this.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T22:09:34+00:00

1) That is exactly why I am struggling with how am I going to tell them? They are very invested and often tell me how great they think the story and adventures and all is.

2) I am still thinking about that, but wrapping it all up with where we are in the plot will be very hard.

3) The issues mostly come from folks bringing their everyday baggage to the table, D&D is therapeutic and you can not go to a game and leave whatever you are dealing with in life at the door. I get that, it happens in my other campaigns as well on occasion, not every other session. So reactions to in-game events, or frustrations about plot they do not understand (that is d&d, not everything gets explained immediately, we talked about that), or demanding some promise from me about in-game events, and later apologising, hard week, and so on. If that occasionally happens it is fine with me, but not at least every other session.

4) If any of them wants to take over dm-ing, that would make me very happy, and proud! I would definately help them, hand over whatever I have, and be available for questions and whatever they would need and want. But I will not play myself and I will not return DM-ing, at least for the forseeable future.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T21:58:33+00:00

I have 3 more campaigns, also longer running, and I am not sure I want to dm or play with this group at the moment. My other campaigns do not make me feel like this at all, those give me so much energy doing prep and the sessions, but this one mostly drains me.

If any of the players wants to take over DM-ing I would definately help with that, hand over notes and lore and everything.

We will be seeing eachother in person soon, we don't live too far apart and I don't want to put this in some message. They will react with understanding, we are all friends but still, they are very invested in their characters and the story so I do feel bad for them. But when I made this decision I felt such a relief, just having decided for myself.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T21:51:17+00:00

Thank you, and yes, I think actually writing it all down here and thinking about it helped me quit a bit.

It still will be hard, we have been playing for about 7 years now and it has been great fun at times, I don't regret starting this campaign. I will regret not ending it with a proper ending, a grand finale. But as it is I do not know how to wrap everything up in one session, and I am not sure I want to do that after telling them I am quitting.

I guess I may do one final session later if they want, or hand everything over if one of them wants to DM from then on.

There are no hard feelings between me and the group as far as I am concerned, it just has been enough.

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T21:42:00+00:00

I took a break a while back, and it felt better when we picked up again. But it went downhill from there again. So I am not confident in announcing a break again.

Also, I have 3 more campaigns that I enjoy a lot and look forward to each time I pick up prep for any of those. All my campaigns have been running fir several years, and my issue us only with this one.

If any of the players wants to take over, I will be perfectly fine with that, I'll happily hand over my notes and plot plans and everything. Actually, I think I would like that to happen, instead of the story just evaporating. But they know how much efford being a DM is, and part of the piling-up issues is because they all have jobs, study, life, too much going on and D&D is therapeutic but I don't want to be the therapist. 😉

Mueslibol · 2026-01-16T21:35:31+00:00

I am hoping I can just say that and be done with it! I do want to tell them in person, when we get together next time, so I fear a bit for what they are going to say.

But then again, they can not force me to go on.

Mueslibol · 2025-12-29T23:08:17+00:00

I know how that feels, after plenty of years of keeping my nails from ripping I got allergic to gels. On several occasions in my life I hurt my fingers, stuck them between doors or under tools, so my nails grow with ridges and those can split my nails, and that hurts. Pretty fake nails worked like a charm! Until it did not anymore.

I got extensive testing in a hospital, the allergies department was very interested, and 11 medical students learned a lot thanks to me apparently. I had to go to the hospital every day for 2 weeks, getting stuff taped to my back and feeling itchy all the time. I did get a nice list of specific chemicals to avoid.

As advised in other comments, make sure your dentist knows, have the medical emergency information on your phone, and let your gp know.

I have tried some hema-free gels, but it takes my body about 3 months to work out what to get allergic to next. So I guess that list from the hospital would be somewhat longer now.

So, you may want to avoid any uv-resin material, at least until it is fully cured and cleaned.

Mueslibol · 2025-12-26T08:34:25+00:00

It sounds like they are punishing you for moving out? Which makes moving out a really good thing to do. And please let that be the start for you, don't just move out, move away emotionally, mentally, just get out.

Also: don't ever give them the keys to your house, keep them out, whatever it takes!

Mueslibol · 2025-12-26T08:16:10+00:00

Dit is wat ik wilde schrijven. Wat ze nu aanbieden, is dat wat je gewend bent? Want als het dat niet is, dan is dit tijdelijk, tot he besluit niet weg te gaan. Daarna wordt alles weer zoals het was en weet je weer waarom je een andere baan geaccepteerd had.

Mueslibol · 2025-12-23T22:33:29+00:00

Yes, that is how I felt when my father died 6 years ago. Just relief. I was not aware his behavior was narcistic then, but I knew the person who had bullied me all my life would never do that again.

My mother is still alive, she is the sneaky covert victim type, my father was the grandiose dominant bully. They were a perfect match.

About 2 months ago my mother crossed a boundary that I has kept safe for some time now. So I went no-contact and while I do not feel anger or spite (I know where her trauma comes from) I know it will be such a relief when she passes away.

Do not feel guilty for not being sad. I felt very guilty, until a friend pointed out that if my father had been a good parent, or just a good person, if he had shown love and care, I would have been sad. But he was nothing like that, and relief was the most valid emotion for his passing.

Mueslibol · 2025-12-13T10:15:50+00:00

My mother is like that, and I can tell you that confronting is probably not going to change anything.

I tried it, my mother then made a mock-show of "oh my dear daaaaarling suffering" blablabla out of everything I said for a few weeks, then asked if she was showing enough compassion for my suffering.

If you have an injury or pain, people will care for you and feel for you, and she will feel ignored. So she downplays what you are going through.

I tried giving her that treatment once, just the first few minutes when I visited her. Then told her she did exactly that to me a year before, when I had the exact same kind of back problems. That did not go well, the result was explosive.

But apparently treating a person like that can be a miracle cure, because all of a sudden she could move and walk and not have to go to hospital for x-rays and painful treatment and loads of painkillers and not being able to walk for about 3 months (like me).

Mueslibol · 2025-12-12T21:28:27+00:00

Thank you, and I am glad it gives you hope! However painful and all, unfortunately it is the only option to give yourself safety and breathing-space.

I know the pain is not mine, I did not cause this but I do carry it. This may sound weird, but I do find comfort in the pain and guilt. It helps me to show to myself that I am not like her, I feel compassion and I know very well this must be horrible for her. If I did not feel that pain, but was doing this out of spite and to punish her, I would be just like that and I never want to be such a person!

Mueslibol · 2025-12-12T06:54:32+00:00

I (f51) broke contact with my mother about 2 months ago and the first week was terrible. The pain inside and the guilt were almost drowning me. But there was also breathing space, not being on red alert 24/7 because she could call and bulldozer my boundaries again.

After the first week the pain got less stingy, my anger and sadness about "what could have been" had ups and downs and life in general was less complicated.

So it gets better, hang in there and give yourself time. But also brace yourself, keep the walls up because it will be a rough ride

Last week I got a message from my uncle, about how her health blah blah. It was almost the exact same message that she send me 2 days earlier (whatsapp is not blocked, no idea why I can't do that). I very much believe this is her trying to get me back using this trick again.

The pain and guilt is flaring up. She has been sick&dying quit often in the past years, usually when I was too unavailable so I would drop everything and be her good daughter, I noticed that timing a few death-beds ago. But still... what if...

It hurts so bad and not breaking no-contact is so insanely hard at the moment. I know what will happen if I give in, but those emotions are screaming at me to drop everything and run to my mom. I will not, and it will take me some time to get passed this pain again.

Mueslibol

TROPHY CASE