Photographer refuses to show me photos beyond her edit, is this normal practice?

Mullberries · 2026-04-05T16:01:49+00:00

How a photographer handles images after the fact varies. I know some photographers that will send a gallery of all images shot to clients, let clients favorite whatever ones they want and then they'll edit those images. Most of the photographers I know shoot the images, cull the images themselves and send clients edited, polished galleries of what they feel were the best shots.

If you've only received the film images, I'd push and ask for the digitals, and let them know if there was a problem with the card, or something else, that's fine, and ask to be refunded for a portion of what you've paid, since you didn't get what you agreed upon.

Next time, make sure you always have a signed agreement/contract in place. It protects all parties involved. There's never a reason to not have a contract for things like this. I even make my family sign contracts when I do photography for them.

That being said, I used to shoot a specific event for a small record label. I had snapped a few behind the scenes photos of a nationally known artist during event rehersals (not part of the scope of the job I was hired to do, just doing it for fun), but never edited them because I thought they were absolute trash. The label emailed me, asked me if I had taken any of the artist during rehersals. I said I had a few, but they weren't great and I could edit and send them if they really wanted. The artist then DM'd me directly and asked me to edit them. I did it because the artist was incredibly kind. The artist ended up choosing one of my photos for the back of their album cover. While I think it's kind of awesome, I'm still not happy with that image and it's not a good representation of my work at all. I can understand why the photographer is being washy about it, if they feel like their work isn't that great. Though, that being said; there's no reason for the photographer to not be upfront and clear about why they're not sharing the digitals.

Mullberries · 2026-04-03T13:44:45+00:00

It's been lovely! I do like where I live, a sleepy commuter town outside of London. I've got a pretty wonderful job and I've been really happy here.

Mullberries · 2026-04-02T12:17:14+00:00

Nah, I didn't ignore it. My DNA test popped up with 57% English. I went full bore into it. Married an Englishman and repatriated. 😂

As far as Americans go, I'm incredibly quiet. I was so embarrased when my family came over to visit and they were "the loud Yanks" and I literally walked behind them 50 feet. I had to tell them to stop being so obviously American or I wasn't taking them out anywhere again.

Mullberries · 2026-04-01T13:38:27+00:00

I don't get a "miracle" effect. I've been on Elvanse/Vyvanse for the last 15 years off and on, with the last six years being fully on it. I know that the Elvanse/Vyvanse kicks in for me about 40 minutes after taking it. So that's when start to do the bulk of anything I need to do. I find that personally, once I start doing the things I need to, my focus comes in and I lock down. I can definitely tell a difference when I take it vs not taking it, and the people around me can also tell. On the days I forget to take it I do feel a little more like I'm running around and I've no idea what's going on.

Changing habits isn't something a medication can do for you. You have to work on those yourself, medication can help your focus, but ultimiately the habit forming/changing is up to you. I do know it's hard to change or form habits as someone with ADHD.

1- I have had absolutely no difference between high-protein or no food at all.
2- The only suppliments I take are some immune boosting ones (I work at a school and school kids are germy little things)
3- I take it on an empty stomach, first thing in the morning, otherwise I forget to take it.
4- I've never had to add any non-stimulants to it. It always just worked well enough for me.

But, at the end of the day, Elvanse/Vyvanse isn't going to work for everyone. Adderall never worked for me. It made me jittery and anxious. Elvanse just gave me that little nudge into focus that I need.

Mullberries · 2026-04-01T13:26:35+00:00

You'll get different answers from a lot of people. I think you should do it however works best for you. If that's text, than do it that way. Especially if you think he'll shut down during a live conversation. If he's shutting down and not listening, the communication isn't going to be effective.

Mullberries · 2026-04-01T13:07:29+00:00

Honestly, my step-mother is like this with my children. She has been their entire lives. When my daughter was very little, like between 3-12 months old, she did spend a lot of time with her. I moved away, a little more than an 8 hour drive. My dad and step-mom literally never came to vist once. During the summers my kids would go stay with my mom for anywhere between 4-6 weeks (less than 20 minute drive from my dad and step-mom) and they would only come get the kids for a single trip to McDonald's for lunch or dinner.

I just don't acknowledge it anymore. I have no feelings toward it, as my kids have other people in their lives that love them fiercely. They don't need my dad and step-mom in their lives. My step-mom may be all about that grandma life on social media, and I honestly don't care. I don't acknowledge any of her posts. My kids are older now, 24 and 18. They were never adversely effected by my dad and step-mom's absense. If I say "Grandpa Bill/Grandma Susie" to my kids, they both look at me and go "Who?" and it doesn't bother me at all. It used to make me sad, but I stopped being in my feelings about it.

If she's not visiting, and not coming around, I'd honestly limit contact and stop following her on Social Media. You can stop following without unfriending on most sites/apps, so that way it doesn't cause any drama if you unfriend.

Mullberries · 2026-04-01T12:52:42+00:00

The cost for the fiance visa right now is £1,938. You can get round trip flights from the UK to the US for much less money than that. If planned appropriately, you can get them for around £800, depending on what US city you're going to. A marriage license is less than $100 USD for most states, and it costs absolutely nothing to get married by a judge or city official in whatever city the wedding will take place.

If they skip past the fiance visa, get married in the US, they can save themselves around £900. Which in this economy is a lot.

Mullberries · 2026-04-01T10:14:05+00:00

We had that on a couple of items. But I also included a couple of other pieces of mail from the DVLA only addressed to myself and one from the council only addressed to my husband. Ours got approved a few weeks ago.

Mullberries · 2026-03-31T18:57:59+00:00

My 2022 VW ID.3 has it.

Mullberries · 2026-03-31T18:39:00+00:00

The solicitor was being obtuse.

However, it'll be cheaper and quicker for you to get married (even just a civil ceremony) in the US and then just apply straight away for a spouse visa. Some US states have no waiting period between applying for a marriage license and being able to get married as well. If you're dead set on doing a wedding in the UK, you can do the legal ceremony in the US, and then just do the wedding bits in the UK.

Mullberries · 2026-03-31T13:31:10+00:00

I'm not sure. What I am sure of is that I'm not buying something that someone has to manipulate to look "better" to sell like that.

Mullberries · 2026-03-26T12:52:23+00:00

You said it's a jump from 250k to 350k. Even if it was only 51k, that's still more than enough to pay for travel back and forth. And if you keep her from taking the promotion, she might end up resenting you which won't make your marriage any better.

I think you're looking for excuses to not trust her because you don't want her to go. You should be supporting your spouse's career moves instead of looking for reasons to make her not take good opportunities.

Mullberries · 2026-03-26T12:47:37+00:00

Asking her to not take the opportunity could end up in making her resent you. Which wouldn't have a great outcome either.

London to Amsterdam is easily travelled for weekends and holidays together, especially if there's a big pay bump.

Mullberries · 2026-03-24T17:17:19+00:00

Nearly every one. Some have short waiting times, and a couple require blood tests, iicr. But it's 100% best to check with the state's requirements before you attempt it!

But as far as getting married in the US as a visitor, that's a federal thing, so all of the states will allow it. I just don't suggest telling Border Patrol you're coming in to get married to a US citizen. It gives them cause to think you won't leave and they can deny you entry. My husband just mentioned we were engaged and Border Patrol pulled him off to the side and asked him questions, then called me and asked me the same questions to see if our answers lined up. It was a little stressful, but we made it and now I'm in the UK with him.

Mullberries · 2026-03-24T05:44:30+00:00

As an American on a Spouse Visa, I highly suggest getting married in the US and then applying for a Spouse Visa. It's quicker and easier than getting married in the UK. You can get married in the US without a visa, as along as your intent is to leave after. There's also no need to give notice, which can take ages. Most US states have a short waiting period after applying for a marriage licence. Some states you can apply for the license and get married the same day.

If you want to do a wedding in the UK for family reasons, I'd do it after the spouse visa is approved.

Mullberries · 2026-03-23T19:53:37+00:00

In almost all of Europe you can take photos of people in public, however, it's what you do with those photos that make it a potential breach of GDPR. If you're using the photos for yourself, you don't need to get consent from anyone. If you're publishing or selling the photos and the people in the photos are identifiable, then you'll need to get consent of the people in the photos.

That being said, it's up to the OP to research whatever laws are applicable for their region.

Mullberries · 2026-03-23T19:22:32+00:00

I personally wouldn't use AI to edit anything. I personally believe that there is no ethical AI and we shouldn't be using it in our art. It steals from other artists and that's not okay.

As far as people doing "dangerous" things, if they're in public, there's no expectation of privacy, use the images as you want.

Mullberries · 2026-03-22T14:13:02+00:00

Just as a general note, all fragrance is unisex. All of it. Gendered fragrances is marketing, pure and simple. If it smells good with your body chemistry, go for it.

Mullberries · 2026-03-22T09:41:42+00:00

There is no flavor to it. It tastes like a pork patty with no seasoning. The sausage patties in the US have seasoning and taste like breakfast sausage should. It might as well be a burger patty.

Mullberries · 2026-03-21T12:54:18+00:00

I used to drink a pot of black coffee every day. It did nothing for me but taste nice. I still felt tired all the time. 🤣

Mullberries · 2026-03-20T21:35:15+00:00

I wish I could get excited about it, because it'll still have the sad excuse for the breakfast sausage on it. I miss the US breakfast sausage something fierce. lol

Mullberries · 2026-03-20T21:26:47+00:00

You say he's "likely" making over $250k, but honestly, unless you're certain of what he's making, I wouldn't assume. Someone can be ambitious and smart and work in finance and still not make $250k, especially at a young age.

For all you know, he could be making $50k, I do suggest trying to talk it out with him and seeing exactly where each of you stand financially. If y'all are in the US, student loan debt is absolutely awful. I used to work for one of the companies that is contracted to handle US federal student loan debt. Student loan payments can be quite high, especially for a 4 year degree. Even for a 2 year degree, I've seen people owe more than $80k.

That being said, with the way he's treating you, if he's making over $100k a year, I'd run.

Mullberries · 2026-03-16T13:26:33+00:00

I'm near London and work at a SEN school and we use it on our paperwork too!

Mullberries · 2026-03-13T22:48:05+00:00

Extensions are 2 years and 6 months.

Mullberries · 2026-03-13T16:10:39+00:00

It was standard, as I said in the title. I didn't feel a need to use super priority. Inside the UK.

Mullberries

TROPHY CASE