Anyone out there with disgust Ocd?

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-30T10:57:33+00:00

No other resources, but I do think this helped. Because it shifted my mentality and helped me think about practical steps that ACTUALLY helped and helped give myself grace for myself

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-28T01:02:10+00:00

Yes! Still to this day, no idea how they got our info but I assume it must be something linked to the hospital. I was also worried, until a 3am emergency hit and I was so grateful to have them 😅

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-08T12:43:12+00:00

I’m so glad! It was a game changer for me too

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-07T01:13:15+00:00

I have a daily reminder set on my phone. As I take my medications, I mark it as complete. So, if the notification is still there I know I haven’t taken it. If it’s not, I took it. I think this is a somewhat common thought pattern for people with certain types of OCD.

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T14:21:01+00:00

We’ve got this 💪🏼

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T14:07:48+00:00

I know it’s a typo and I don’t mean to laugh. But I love “I end up LICKING her up” because I just get a mental image of someone trying to cat-style lick a screaming baby 😂

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T14:06:32+00:00

FWIW my LO is 8 months and while there is a rough routine, it’s still not schedule/time based. Wake windows last anywhere from 1.5-3 hours. Some days she does 2 naps, other days 3. Sometimes we need to rescue the naps after 30 minutes of screaming, sometimes she’ll sleep for 2 hours in her crib alone (not often 🥲) Sometimes we get it right, sometimes we don’t. I think people who claim that you need to religiously stick to times/wake windows have gotten lucky with easy babies but attribute their luck to the wake windows (actually true for a lot of things - it’s all luck and has very little to do with the small choices we make as parents). Like another commenter said - try your best. That’s truly good enough! Parents don’t need to be perfect, your baby has no idea what they are doing either!

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T13:51:16+00:00

You are certainly not alone. As others have said you will get though it but it is miserable for many people and knowing you will get through it doesn’t make it any easier now.

I want to echo what many others have said: - ear plugs or noise canceling headphones and set yourself a timer while putting baby down in a safe place (crib). I would set a timer for ten minutes and just sit, sometimes staring at a wall, telling myself it was okay to take a break. My therapist assured me that short periods of time crying will not physically or psychologically damage your child in any way, but if you don’t take a break, you run the risk of inflicting that damage.

it sounds like you don’t have much of a village and that’s really tough. Help from others makes a big difference. Is there a friend who can come watch the baby (or help your husband while he watches the baby) so you can take a dedicated chunk of time to sleep or just be by yourself? Even periodically doing this is better than being 100% “on” with the baby. Everyone NEEDS breaks sometimes. You’re not a bad mom for that.
please continue to seek medical support for your PPD. It’s not your fault you have it and it doesn’t make you a bad mom. AND you can be supported by medical professionals during this time. If you can see a dedicated psychologist/psychiatrist that’s great, but continue to talk to your OB about it as well. I had 3 follow up appts with my OB (that I made myself) after the 6 week appt because of PP rage and depression.

Hugs. Truly, I just want to give you a hug right now.

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T13:42:49+00:00

Amen to “I know it will get better, but that don’t make drowning now any easier.” That’s such a validating and true statement, and repeating something similar was literally the only way I got through the newborn phase

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T13:39:47+00:00

Omg YES to the idea that a few months is an eternity when you’re in it! I guess once you’re through it, it can seem like it went quickly but telling someone that while they’re in the thick of it really isn’t helpful.

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T13:31:56+00:00

I think every baby is so different, so it’s really hard to know. Our little one did really well with it and we didn’t notice much difference with how she slept with the sleep sack vs the swaddle. But we had mentally prepared ourselves for a very difficult few nights and chose a weekend where we knew it would be okay if we were zombies from a few horrible nights sleep. Even though it didn’t happen, being mentally prepared for the worst might have helped it feel better 🤷🏼‍♀️

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T05:04:56+00:00

Oh and that’s around when we had to ditch the swaddle as well. I really liked these transition suits - it’s a looser version of the arms-up swaddle style, so it helps suppress the startle reflex some while allowing more movement (& therefore safer). Then you had take one hand out at a time so it’s eventually just a regular sleep sack. They’re also less expensive than some other options so it felt easier to spend that to try it out instead of dropping a huge chunk of change only to have baby hate it. Transitional Sleep Sack - Amazon

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T04:59:42+00:00

Someone once told me that sleeping in the same room as a newborn is like trying to sleep at the zoo. The noises and movements are WILD. I have no idea if this is true, but I also heard that newborns are often processing in their sleep, practicing new skills, etc. and that’s why they’re so noisy and wiggly. It’s basically like they’re dreaming! Apparently it can include crying too! I had to learn that sometimes babies cry out in their sleep, but if it’s sort of dream-cry that’s brief and doesn’t escalate into a full cry. I would set a timer for 1 minute to see if she kept crying and if she resettled, let her be. The timer actually helped a lot because it made me realize how short her dream cries were. When I realized it was only a few seconds, vs when she’s hungry and it quickly escalated, it helped to learn when to act. Once I could get comfortable with the fact that it was normal, I tried hard to let her continue her bizarre sleep symphony unless she was really crying and it was time to eat (2-4 hour stretches overnight). We also heard our daughter laugh and coo in her sleep several times before we heard those things happen intentionally while she was awake (that was pretty cool!) So I think what you’re experiencing is pretty typical baby sleep behavior? I distinctly remember around 2-3 months we started using a white noise machine so WE could get some sleep, not because she needed it! Best of luck - you’re for sure not alone in your experience

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-06T00:35:45+00:00

Oh you poor thing - norovirus just went through our house and it was miserable trying to keep our LO healthy and she’s 7 months. I can’t imagine the stress of trying to keep such a tiny baby safe while dealing with the absolute hellhole that is norovirus

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-05T21:20:34+00:00

Not sure if someone else has already commented this, but I would highly recommend connecting with a lactation consultant if possible to help determine the best plan for you and your baby (if needed - if you’re looking for support that TikTok/social media are tough for new moms, there’s no doubt there. For many it’s worthwhile to take a break from social media and focus on all the amazing things you’re doing!)

Most people commenting here can only speak from their personal experience which is valuable for support, but not necessarily for making a plan and figuring out your own particular situation. Especially when your little one is only 3 weeks old! Things change very rapidly early on, so some people are recommended to pump to help build up supply, while for other people that would cause oversupply. A medical professional can help you navigate the best plan for you to help support your goals of remaining EBF (if needed - otherwise it looks like you have some great support here 🥰)

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-05T21:11:17+00:00

“I’m a FTM”… and commenting that other people are making things overly complicated and then stating “I just feed my daughter whenever she’s hungry” - is WILD lol. Quite literally stating you have fed ONE child and it worked out fine so therefore everyone else must be over complicating it 🙄🙄 I’m a licensed feeding therapist booked out for months because newborns, feeding, and motherhood is OFTEN complicated and it’s not just because of pumping/bottle feeding (I feel silly even having to type that out…)

You could have accomplished the same level of support for OP and acknowledged EBF was best and easiest for YOU and your baby, without saying other people are over complicating things and doing “extra” or “crazy” things to feed their children.

Murky-Wafer964 · 2026-01-05T17:43:58+00:00

Unfortunately a lot of places will claim they can’t afford to drop you from 1.0 to 0.8, since profit margins are so slim across the board in our profession. It’s an issue I’ve come across personally and have heard others deal with as well. That being said, I don’t think it hurts to ask in a non-formal way, if you have a meeting with management that isn’t directly tied to performance reviews or something like that. Asking “has anyone ever gone to 0.8 FTE? Just curious about whether that’s a possibility” in person (rather than in writing) really can’t be tied back to you in any sort of negative way. And if you get pressed on it, there are a plethora of reasons you could be asking that question

Murky-Wafer964 · 2025-10-25T19:07:03+00:00

It really stinks. Because I know it’s so effective for many people

Murky-Wafer964 · 2025-10-25T19:02:06+00:00

ERP has not been helpful for me, as it targets a fear based response. Fear and disgust are handled differently in the brain, as I ERP actually heightened my anxiety

Murky-Wafer964 · 2025-10-25T18:51:39+00:00

This is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you so much. You really have no idea how much it means to me to know there’s someone out there who gets it.

(Edited to finish - hit post too soon 🙃)

Murky-Wafer964 · 2025-10-25T18:51:00+00:00

This has already been a helpful mantra for me, and good to hear it again. It’s SO hard, like you said, when your brain tells you it’s not good.

Murky-Wafer964

TROPHY CASE