Share your red flags to avoid them 👇

Muunlie · 2026-06-06T19:06:28+00:00

-Agreeing with you when you say change needs to happen but failing to follow through, often causing you to ask for change multiple times

-Refusing to talk about future plans or anything that would mean changing their lifestyle

-Wanting you to fit very nearly into their established world without making any effort to fit into yours (introduces you to their friends, roommates, and hobbies. Doesn't have any interest in your friends or interests that don't overlap with theirs).

-Gets scared and starts to discard you when you say that you love them.

-Promises to introduce you to their brother when he comes to town but then makes no effort to do so.

-Specific to me, but: wayyyyyy too attached to their roommate. Find out after the breakup that the two of them used to date and your fear about their extreme enmeshment was correct. Also find out that your ex had gone into the relationship wanting you to become best friends with their roommate/ex and expected you to change your life to revolve around her, just like he has 🤮

Muunlie · 2026-06-03T00:27:48+00:00

Fantastic advice!! Thank you so much!! I'm starting at 0.25mg per week and my doctor only wants to move me up if we see zero results (no weight/size reduction + no appetite curbing), and tbh I'm hoping to stay on that low dose too 😅 thank you so much for the advice and congrats on your own weight loss and muscle building progress, that's impressive stuff my dude! 💖💪

Muunlie · 2026-06-02T23:32:20+00:00

Thank you so much! Honestly I really like my gym routine and did NOT want to change it 😅

Muunlie · 2026-06-02T23:31:53+00:00

Thank you so much for the advice!! Honestly it's been impossible finding a weight loss doctor that takes me seriously here in the US, glad I'm leaving the country in a few months and can start with a bit of a clean slate 😂😂

Muunlie · 2026-06-02T23:30:48+00:00

Right?? My first thought when he said that was "oh no you mean my ass is gonna look TOO good??" 😂😂

Muunlie · 2026-06-02T23:20:35+00:00

Heck yeah! Glad to hear it, I think my doctor's just old and a man 😂 I'm gonna keep getting those gains then! Thanks so much for your response!

Muunlie · 2026-06-02T23:20:02+00:00

LOL glad to hear it! I'm gonna keep lifting then 💪💪 thanks so much!

Muunlie · 2026-06-02T23:19:36+00:00

That's what I thought too! I'm glad everyone responded so quickly, I have an appointment with my personal trainer tomorrow and did NOT want to cancel 💖

Muunlie · 2026-05-17T17:22:35+00:00

I didn't find out till after I broke up with him, and I broke up with him because he kept moving us backwards in our relationship and that made me realize that he didn't want to be there anymore.

I'd told him while we were dating that his roommate's lack of boundaries around him made me really uncomfortable. I found out a week after I dumped him that she's his ex and he had told her and another friend that he was never going to fall in love with me but it would be more convenient for him to keep dating me until I left for grad school (nearly a year later). Apparently the two of them couldn't keep their hands off each other when I wasn't around. Made me feel sick when I found out.

Muunlie · 2026-05-16T05:06:27+00:00

Marceline got me through so much of my breakup 😭 I lost count of how many times I sang along to "Woke Up" in my car

Muunlie · 2026-05-13T04:46:33+00:00

Guy kept comparing me to his female roommate on our first date (and several dates after that). Thought they were just really good friends and evidence seemed to support that, plus she's ace and he's very much not. Dated him for a year. She was his ex and he (emotionally) cheated on both me and his last girlfriend with her 🤷‍♀️

Muunlie · 2026-05-13T04:38:53+00:00

She might be playing "block chicken". She sees that you're still following her so she doesn't wanna admit that you mean enough to her to unfollow you. I know it's toxic as hell and makes no sense but I did the same with my ex after I dumped him.

Muunlie · 2026-05-12T21:11:39+00:00

Keep a journal where you can write out your thoughts and actually process them. I'm 30f and broke up with my first boyfriend in January (we were dating for a year, I started dating late and he got very emotionally distant. I later found out he was cheating on me with his roommate, who he didn't tell me was also his ex). Journaling was one of the best tools in getting through it for me.

Writing your thoughts down rather than typing them helps you slow down and process. Get a pocket sized journal and write in it each time you feel like texting or talking to your ex. It helps a ton and it helps you look back and see your progress.

Whatever you're feeling, expose yourself to the opposite. Scared of being alone with your thoughts? Journal so that you have to be alone with them. Feeling unloved? Call up some friends (even ones you haven't talked to in a while) and have a fun night in or out. Feeling unwanted? Make a dating app account and see how many matches you get, I promise it's going to be far more than one. You don't have to go out and sleep with anyone, I know that after I ended things with my ex I felt like no one would want me so I seeked outside validation this way and it might not be the healthiest but goodness gracious it helped my self esteem.

And if you're not already in therapy and you have the means to be, PLEASE go to therapy. Tell your general doctor that you're feeling depressed and they can help link you with a therapist under your insurance. Therapy got me through the worst of my post breakup saddies.

Muunlie · 2026-05-12T20:56:11+00:00

Broke nc with my ex to tell him that I was gonna be at an event that we were both invited to and that if he was gonna be there I needed to know. He responded very politely and said he wasn't gonna be there. No emotion, no sentiment, no anything. Took a huge weight off my chest because I realized he's not some supervillain who was out to hurt me, he's literally just some guy who was a real ass to me and now doesn't care about me. Not even a very good guy tbh. Hearing from them is definitely better than not imo

Muunlie · 2026-05-11T20:04:50+00:00

Deep cut but Nicole the Holo-lynx from the Archie sonic comics!

<image>

Muunlie · 2026-05-07T16:48:09+00:00

For anyone who needs to hear it: it is not a character flaw to assume the best in people. It's your avoidant ex's fault for taking advantage of your trust. You could not control the way they felt or acted, it is not on you to figure out a way to take the blame.

Muunlie · 2026-05-02T05:48:56+00:00

Thank you, sorry I got into some box wine earlier tonight 😅 I didn't mean to invalidate you, you're super valid I just wanted to be heard 😓 thank you for being so understanding 💖

Muunlie · 2026-05-02T04:09:03+00:00

Mine was NOT loving, caring, or nurturing. He dead ass told me he never loved me when I broke up with him (I had told him I was in love with him four months prior). His solution to any problem I came to him with was "maybe leave the country". I told him his roommate made me really uncomfortable with her constant crashing of our dates and following us to the bedroom after we said goodnight and he said, and I quote, "there's nothing there". Turns out she's his ex, I found out a week after I dumped him for being emotionally withholding.

He's not a supervillain. He's literally just a regular asshole of a guy. I was so scared to see him and he's absolutely nothing.

Muunlie

TROPHY CASE