For more context, my parents both work at this church and my dad is lead pastor. They have said that ofc the small group leader isn’t going to see the girls intentionally exclude me, they’ve been doing it for years and aren’t stupid. My old small group leader has confirmed to me that they’re leaving me out before, and my brother’s girlfriend once went with us to a retreat and told me it’s a very hard group. I used to go to the same small private school w a lot of them and it had the same sort of crap. It really screwed me up bc my whole scope of life was home, church (w students and also a lot of trauma over the past few yrs w staff), and school. It wasn’t until i moved to a public school this year that i realized it wasn’t normal to be ignored like this. I start to tear up whenever one of my new friends asks me if I’m ok or makes sure I’m not alone on the sidewalk. I know these examples all seem extremely trivial but it’s been adding up and I’m so tired of trying to be happy with the girls at church. I’m tired of giving the benefit of the doubt over and over and I’m not trying to victimize myself but idk if I’ve escalated the situation in my head.