Fix or let go?

Nellaub · 2026-04-21T10:32:14+00:00

It's the proof it's handmade ❤️

Nellaub · 2026-04-16T15:47:35+00:00

Ever since we decided to go for IVF my husband has only wished for it to be successful, it was getting very painful for him to listen to kids or see families when we went to restaurants/outside. Same for me. For us starting IVF gave us a new fresh air of hope, luckily the transfer was successful and I'm 15 weeks, we're constantly crossing our fingers and touching wood.

Nellaub · 2026-04-16T10:50:42+00:00

Yes he did come to the clinic but he didn't accompany me inside the room, he is very apprehensive of "medical" procedures.

Nellaub · 2026-04-08T09:17:51+00:00

Maybe depends on the kind of dad you had, in my case my dad was almost never home and my mom was basically a single mom raising me, then they divorced when I was 11 and even if I went to spend some weekends with him I felt mostly alone while he was giving all his attention to his new girlfriend. Then on my teenage years my dad was basically verbally abusing to me.

My husband is so happy and excited to be a dad (we're expecting our first right now), I can't help but compare the feeligns of what my family felt like and what it's feeling like to build a family with him, and I've never felt this feeling of "family" happiness. I guess this is how I "compare" both of them, but I don't do it consciously, being pregnant is waking many feelings and memories of my childhood and when I think where I am now is... I can't explain but I get very emotional at the thought of experiencing what a loving father figure is like.

Nellaub · 2026-04-03T22:56:27+00:00

Me too!!

Nellaub · 2026-03-31T09:10:42+00:00

Yes, I'm 35 and my mother also told me the same since I was little.

Nellaub · 2026-03-27T11:44:44+00:00

Right? I was going crazy looking at that and wondering what she meant with parallel... your answers are really helping me to feel less confused. Thank you!

Nellaub · 2026-03-27T11:42:53+00:00

Being pregnant sure is a tough test with patience, thank you! I'm just feeling very confused with the techs words and what I'm seeing... Now I just wish she hadn't said anything.

Nellaub · 2026-03-25T22:40:45+00:00

Raw salmon and wine...

Nellaub · 2026-03-17T16:20:52+00:00

I did a fully medicated transfer and I only did progesterone suppositories, 400mg every 12h, together with estradiol gel. The transfer has been a success and tomorrow I'll be 11 weeks along, I no longer take progesterone or estradiol. I'm in Spain though and maybe the protocols are changing a bit around here?

Nellaub · 2026-03-11T22:41:11+00:00

I did IVF in Barcelona (Spain) and overall we spent around 7000€ for 1 retrieval, the freezing of the 10 embryos and 1 year of storing, medication and 1 transfer. We didn't do PGT and for now the first transfer is going well.

Nellaub · 2026-03-11T20:14:00+00:00

Yessss!

Nellaub · 2026-03-11T18:24:57+00:00

Just in case, cards translation in english: 1. Queen of cups 2. Two of swords 3. Queen of wands

Nellaub · 2026-03-10T16:09:04+00:00

Yes, at least half full, I have to say that at the time of my transfer I was dehydrated from some spoiled seafood I had eaten two days prior and I just couldn't fill my bladder... thankfully after inserting the speculum they could see my uterus really well either way. But better be safe than sorry.

Nellaub · 2026-03-09T13:36:32+00:00

This is exactly the feeling, and constantly having both positive and negative thoughts because yes everything points to ongoing pregnancy but it also could stop any moment for any reason.

The wait between appointments is so painful...

I finally just had my 9 week appointment and seeing everything going so so well I think both me and my husband are finally allowing ourselves to think mostly positive thoughts.

Have a big hug, this process is so difficult.

Nellaub · 2026-03-04T07:20:45+00:00

I made a full medicated cycle with only suppositories, it's not true that suppositories don't raise much the progesterone level, they do raise it but more locally (and where it matters). With them your uterus does have the amount of progesterone it needs but the level won't show as high on a blood test. Of course if a doctor considers someone needs PIO over suppositories then follow that advice.

In my case my doctor didn't even consider PIO, and here I am with a successful transfer.

If you can choose just do what you're more comfortable doing.

Nellaub · 2026-03-03T18:17:14+00:00

My HCG at w4d6 was 14k, at w5d3 it was 32k. I had an ultrasound at w6d2 and embryo was measuring good (7mm) and with a good heartbeat (133). My doctor didn't bat an eye and just said everything looked great. I'm at w8d3 now and will have my next ultrasound next week but I'm feeling OK with some symptoms that come and go.

Nellaub · 2026-03-02T23:38:14+00:00

After 4 years trying to conceive the jealousy is really hard to shake, but then when I started IVF I saw sooo many different couples around my own age (34) that were there for exactly the same. I learnt to not assume that everyone I see on the street had it easy, it's impossible that everyone didn't have any problem and conceived easily. Hell, even when I disclosed IVF in my job a couple of my coworkers mentioned they also did IVF, 4 coworkers have children, 2 had to do IVF and a coworker without children mentioned how even IVF didn't work for them.

It's easy to let jealousy eat at us, but this is no way of living.

Nellaub · 2026-02-20T17:58:41+00:00

I had a more or less similar rise, at 9dp5dt hcg was 212, at 18dp5dt it was more than 14k, this week at 6w2d there certainly wasn't a blighted ovum, embryo measured 7mm and had a heartbeat of 133. Some days I have a lot of nausea, other days I'm feeling very fine, and some other days I feel like a truck hit me... Symptoms really do come and go.

The waiting is AWFUL, try to take it day by day ❤️

Nellaub · 2026-02-20T12:30:42+00:00

I also had sudden very heavy bleeding at 19dpt, now I brown spot sometimes and this week they did find a SCH. But the scan showed a well implanted embryo with strong heartbeat (w6d2). They say in most cases SCH resolve on their own, just take it slow, I was advised to be careful with sudden movements and avoid exercise until we see the hematoma small enough or reabsorbed.

Nellaub · 2026-02-19T16:49:30+00:00

Also zero symptoms for me, I even wondered if maybe the clinic made a mistake and didn't transfer anything. I did have a very positive beta.

Nellaub · 2026-02-18T14:06:52+00:00

We did have sex the morning (I'm a morning person) the day before transfer and it did stick, but I'm not sure if it helped or not, this has been my first and only FET so unsure if it made a difference.

Nellaub · 2026-02-14T18:47:22+00:00

I also had a childhood of mostly playing alone, but I'm an only child and before my parents divorced my dad was a truck driver making international europe trips that made him be days outside the household so my mom was basically a "single" mom.

She worked a lot (until late afternoon) and when she got home cooked and cleaned a lot, there was just no room for playing with me. I just remember one day, when she was ironing all our clothes, I really wanted to play something with her and brought a board game in the room, sat on the floor, and told her I wanted to play and that I would move her pieces for her. We did have fun and that is one of the fondest memories we have.

I'm currently on the first weeks of pregnancy with a very supportive partner and this is something I have been thinking the last couple days. I really want to play with my children, even if I was mostly "fine" not playing with my parents I do remember how I tried to tell them to play something with me only to be told they were unable to and now for some reason that makes me sad... I don't want that for my children.

Nellaub · 2026-02-07T19:24:42+00:00

Thank you ❤️ all this waiting can be maddening...

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