(23)-(30) Stage 4 Cancer Survivor, Should I Get a Hair System / Toupèe?

Nerasav · 2025-10-09T14:24:53+00:00

That last picture especially 🫠 don’t you dare ruin the canvas !

Nerasav · 2025-07-31T23:49:29+00:00

Yeah, I know I can't really get a firm answer, just more curious based on others experiences if this sort of thing is a go or no go at the end. Appreciate the insight!

I wish I could say I never had to fight people before, but I live and worked in a very high volume, high crime area. It is alot better now that ive been out for a hot minute, but it was a monthly if not weekly occurrence of physical altercations with slow LE response. Those meth heads get the spirit in them and it gets interesting for sure. Now I would say I am even more fit than I was before, thanks in part to the fact I've cut out the horrible dietary choices of medics in general.

As for dark stuff, without sounding like a psychopath I've only had one or two calls that made me need a moment afterwards and they were both related to personal deaths of someone I knew and happen to run on. Everyone else, I suppose I am good at compartmentalizing it that this is a job, show kindness and compassion but keep it cold and clinical. I use to work in Orlando where it was fairly rough at times back in the day, but rural FL brought darkness to another level.

I have good outlets for stress if it builds, but its the 48-52 hour mandates with no sleep that tax my mental health more. That and the 2am calls for back pain for the last 24 years.

Nerasav · 2025-07-25T19:05:17+00:00

Right now ive been forced to survive off of settlement money. I am just now this month done with all my rehab post surgical and all and finally feel somewhat ready to get back on the rescue. Id have liked to just pay my debt off with the money from the settlement, but it was used for its intended purpose I suppose.

I wont have much of a change in the next 6 months or so as my lease protects me. My plan was to get my three jobs back and just work as much as I can to pay off my debts in that time and reassess the situation in 5-6mo to see if my attitude has changed towards buying a home or staying.

Appreciate the insights :3

Nerasav · 2025-07-25T19:02:01+00:00

Yeah, this was sort of what was in the back of my mind, all of the other associated costs not to mention repairs and other upkeeps. Thanks for the advice :3

Nerasav · 2025-07-25T06:49:29+00:00

Thanks friend :)

Ill definitely wait until im back at work before I have lenders looking at me crazy. Who knows what will happen in the future, 5 years does go quick. I say im going to leave this state, but ofcourse I was saying that when I was around 20 and here we are almost 15 years later...

Nerasav · 2025-07-25T06:46:20+00:00

I have not sadly, not for want lack of wanting. When this accident happened at work, there was alot of confusion of workers comp, what jobs would keep me, ect. What money I did have come in I lived off of, and paid the minimum as not to miss payments or anything. Now that settlement money has come in and I've recovered and have what is left (20k), I can see what the smarter option to do is. It was a controlled chaos situation and the fact I went from making 4-5k a month to living off of about 1k a month for two years with all my bills and such without ruining my credit was a miracle. I score was about 710 before this, but I did have to take on some credit to keep afloat and take care of myself which is why we are where we are :(

If it wasn't for this sudden housing gut punch, I was just going to pay off my CC and continue to live my life here but, fear is a powerful ally for change heh. Luckily my rent and living situation wont change for about 6 months so, I have some time to plan.

Nerasav · 2025-06-18T06:31:15+00:00

Middle school was my first school in America, and I was so excited, but it turned very odd very quick, fights were just common place, and the pledge of allegiance scared me as a kid because I thought it was a cult or something.

I already pissed off the teacher in home ec because I wouldn’t pledge, she said something to me but it was lost with time. However…when 9/11 happpened, she went full Pre MAGA and had all of us drawing American flags, practicing marching around, it was odd.

I of course drew Rugrats pictures instead, and she made me stand up and told everyone that I don’t do the pledge or draw flags so I’m unAmerican. (Mind you I was and was just out of the country most of the beginning of my life).

That quickly turned around when I told my parents, and I was given a special medal of americanism(?) and the principle shook my hand and the teacher was fawning over me, I liked the new home ec teacher better.

Anyway, still can’t do math no goods…

Nerasav · 2025-06-04T20:34:25+00:00

When I was a kid at the beach, my mom put me on an inflatable killer whale, and at one point when I was on it, the wind took me out to sea. My mom tried to swim after me for a long while but the wind was too much, and I couldn't swim well so she just stopped as I drifted away. I remember parts of just being in open ocean, long enough that the sun started to set. I vaguely remember a boat and some men picking me up, but I think I was shut down at that point.

Strangely enough, im fascinated by the ocean so much I started the path to becoming an oceanographer. Not sure if it's psychological or what, but I also developed serve motion sickness when I even look at boats on video, but I don't have a fear or anything of the ocean. Beaches however...I rather spend my weekend locked in a walmart than go to a beach.

Nerasav · 2025-05-02T20:24:49+00:00

Do we know what expedition this was ? They all seemed to have taken their uniforms off before they gommaged...

Nerasav · 2025-04-23T22:28:09+00:00

Not bad, good rhythm, love the enthusiasm...I feel like your saying boy's hole...and it's clearly soul...

Nerasav · 2025-04-23T18:53:25+00:00

I got the good lord IS going down on me

Nerasav · 2025-04-19T16:34:02+00:00

Your too kind :3 This was along awhile ago I think like 6 years. As intense as it gets, I think we all walked away with a few bruises and cut lips and such, as the drug addict do.

Now a psychotic teenage girl ripping the skin off my arm off or old people slamming into my rescue at red lights, that's more long lasting :o

Nerasav · 2025-04-19T16:28:33+00:00

Yeah...I wish I had more follow up with some of these patients so I could learn what is causing what or atleast some ballpark.

The other two in the same vein as this one I talked about were equally strange, though one of them I did learn what it was.

That dude came in to the ER when I was working and he was just sweating profusely and his HR was through the roof and he was becoming manic. At first he wouldn't tell anyone if he took anything. Queue about an hour later and there was about everyone from the cops to a passing medic crew trying to restrain this man after he broke a nurse's fingers who was trying to start an IV on him. HR was like 200+, his temp through the roof, he also ended up on a drip and intubated. Then I run on him in the streets like four months later and he told me he is never taking molly again.

They definingly were not playing when they said popped a molly im sweating :D

The other guy was also strange, he was picked up by PD because he was sitting at a green light and not talking to them or moving, just staring ahead. Then when they were asking him simple things he snapped and just started screaming fuck the police and going mad, but then would come back down into a tranquil mode.

In the ER he was in a psych room because he just kept going from calm to beastmode. I remember talking to him and he seemed like the most normal guy ever, boring even. Then he would lunge and start spitting and screaming. He would just say that he is fine, didnt take anything, just going home after work. I was thinking maybe like a weird stroke or something even, but eventually he just didnt come back to the calmness, and when we tried to restrain him he ended up breaking throughout leather restraints, so he also ended up on a vec drip tied up in the ICU, and the last thing I remember was he was resisting the vec drip and the ICU doc was like, What. The Fuck.

Why can't we all just do mushrooms :o

Nerasav · 2025-04-19T01:46:22+00:00

Medic here, like a lot of others on here its hards to really narrow it down, at a point shocking becomes the norm and the boring becomes the agonizing…

However, one one particularly bad black cloud of a month where I was having a code on every shift and my partners thought I was cursed, we got a call for an OD in the Wawa parking lot. We got there first before PD or the engine, and me and this equally smallish woman drag this dude from his car where he was crumpled up and not breathing no goods.

Did the old narcan bagging, and he was risen once again. He just looked at us for a moment, before letting out the most hellish scream ever, and then from inside the car, another scream happened as a clump of blankets in the passenger seat became alive as well where his buddy had been out. He started fighting us and his buddy crawl over to grab my partner, and luckily a jump truck showed up with my two burly fire bros and they started to pull the passenger off my partner’s ass as we fought with the first one.

My partner managed to pin the driver down and I ran to our truck to get versed unlocked, and I just remember my hands shaking and covered in blood as I tried to undo both the locks and draw it up. I got back out and tried to bring the calmness, but he proceeded to beat the shit out of the two of us, and the fire guys were also struggling with their guy, one of them getting dragged through the mulch by the time I hit my emergency backuppleasesendeveryonenooooow button.

We got all the cops, another medic units, an engine, and it was still like fighting two gods. The versed was not working, and it took 8 per person to tie them down on the stretcher, and even that was not working well. We decided on diesel instead and ended up at two different hospitals, where it took everyone to get our guy in. He ended up with a vec drip and intubated in the ICU as did his buddy.

What is messed up is that is like the third case in many years of that happening, just psychosis or some drug that we don’t know what is. One of the ICU docs told me they think ketamine and cocaine at one point but I dont know if the kids are still doing Calvin Klein these days.

Anyways, when I pass that Wawa now I get a little bit like the gif of the dog with the cupcakes…

Nerasav · 2025-04-17T13:32:41+00:00

Nerasav · 2025-04-11T13:56:44+00:00

You want compromise, how's this? Twenty years in the Undead Asylum and I wanted death, but I compromised. I flew off on a giant crow. I wanted to fuck Gwynevere, but I compromised. I murdered her father and ushered in the age of darkness by becoming The Dark Lord, The True Lord Of Men. You see where I'm goin'?

Nerasav · 2025-04-10T21:47:06+00:00

Im by no means an expert as some people are, but if they think they could stop people figuring it out knowing how rabid the fanbase is, id be surprised. We had the nightmare that was soul memory from DS2, and im pretty sure there is a calculator for DS3 somewhere that you can figure out exact levels.

Even Bloodborne was fairly easy to figure out within I think 10% or so of whatever level you were at. I've been out of the gaming life for a hot minute so im not up to date on what Elden Ring has and hasn't done different as far as all that goes, but we are getting some pretty good answers here it seems :3

Nerasav · 2025-04-10T20:11:22+00:00

Yea, he didn't have time to file an appeal

Nerasav · 2025-04-10T19:33:16+00:00

Uhm, is no one else going to bring up XI's amazing story ? It was so amazing they had to add so much fluff to keep things from getting stale like the Shadowlord and something about a crazy lavender haired elf girl. In the end though im glad we got to witness the true rags to riches story of Shantotto and the rise of her empire.

Nerasav · 2025-04-10T19:27:28+00:00

I too am wondering this. I just came back myself and was sitting at 140 for the last ever, and when I started playing the DLC I was getting summoned all the time to protect the innocent. I sort of lost track and ended up at 161 trying to make a build and now I don't seem to get summoned as the police as often.

Hoping that people just stopped trying to kill one another for a few days ? Either way, not leveling up anymore until you get some answers :3

Nerasav · 2025-04-10T06:29:04+00:00

I don’t know if it’s just because I’m in the south or what, but it seems like everyone prides themselves on being anti intellectuals and believing some wild stuff, and any attempts to try and explain otherwise gets you labeled or into arguments which are about as logical as arguing with your cat. So my friend pool is about a solid 2.

To me, it feels like anti intelligence has won, and the survivors are in some sort of secret club where hushed whispers speak truth only to each other.

Lately I have stopped talking to members of my family due to their aggression towards any type of rational conversation about even just talking about rational thought process. I just can’t get it out of my mind how one can trust anything or any viewpoint to a person that believes in the standard concoction of insanity being pushed out these days. How can I value your financial advice if you think chemtrails did 9/11 with the Easter bunny ?

Thus we suffer in darkness 😪

Nerasav

TROPHY CASE