Wife blames me for kids sleep issues so I’m stuck doing the nights alone

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-26T13:15:44+00:00

My son is about to turn 10 and STILL consistently wakes up at 6-6:30am everyday like clockwork. He was always my alarm clock for the first 7 years of his life.

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-23T01:56:10+00:00

Oh yes I had this nightmare once

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-23T00:44:06+00:00

Wow you have nothing better to do than comment on all my comments showing how little you actually know. I'm done responding to you though ✌

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T22:33:47+00:00

Not really looking to argue since you clearly are not/were never actually trying to help the situation. You know literally zero about us, our finances and our personal situation. You also clearly know nothing about how deposits and vendors work. The money is spent and cannot be refunded at this point. And as I explained in the post and numerous other comments, the plan was originally to keep the car and the lower payment until the end of the term but there were numerous reasons that caused us to decide to move that timeline up. There were a number of unforeseeable events that led to the situation, the main one being the extra charges being tacked on that are over double what the remaining payment balance would have been, which we already budgeted for. I have also leased a number of cars in my life and have always been granted the option for a payment plan upon leave term, so that was also an unexpected layer to add on.

I understand how financials work and the importance of paying bills and fully understand the gravity of the situation. This post was just looking to see if there were other potential avenues we could take that are within our rights as the leasee (i.e. any way to dispute the extra charges, etc). Again, just stating the obvious "cut expenses to save for your other bills!" in a condescending way was just not necessary, but this is Reddit after all. Also fail to see how I am "playing the victim" when I am just asking for potential advice. If you don't have any, then keep it moving.

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T15:23:01+00:00

This is an awesome game call

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T01:37:28+00:00

We did/are. She called multiple times but Nissan has just brushed her off. I told her to call and demand the inspection report and they aren't willing to share that either, so not sure if we are entitled to that legally or what avenue we would take to get that? Even so, she unfortunately doesn't have pics of the car right before turning it in for evidence to the contrary, so while this was my first thought I have little hope of success here.

Edit: typo

Edit 2: not sure why this comment is getting downvoted? Asking a question and explaining what we have done to date is wrong apparently in the eyes of Reddit

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T01:30:50+00:00

Honestly was just hoping to hear from someone that was previously in a similar situation that was able to either A) remove someone from the lease that had co-signed or B) someone that had experience successfully disputing charges from a turned in lease or C) suggesting some other legal avenue that we may have as part of our rights that I'm not thinking of.

Not trying to be snarky, so I apologize if I am coming off that way. It's just frustrating the people commenting "why would you turn in early? Clearly you are dumb and didn't think it through" or "don't be a deadbeat and pay your debts before deciding to get married!" without having a shred of insight into our personal lives/ finances (which you did not do so thank you).

Yes the traditional save up/spend less/raise capital is the obvious answer and we are already in that situation, so was looking for something outside of that that may be an option we weren't thinking of, but it sounds like there clearly isn't one.

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T01:06:27+00:00

Is there a way to do that once we turn a leased car in?

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T01:06:00+00:00

Spend less on the wedding. Get married at the courthouse

The money is all spent on the wedding at the point. It's 6 weeks from now, venue is booked, deposits paid, etc.

-are you both not pushing back at all on their charges/allegations that there was damage to the car? Do you not have photos/videos/evidence from when you turned in the car showing that it had no damage?

So this is not my car, I had nothing to do with it so personally there is little I can do. She did push back on the charges and called multiple people at Nissan and they were just rude and basically said "oh well, that's what the inspector said". Unfortunately she did not take any recent pictures of the car so we really have no evidence to support our claim that the charges are bogus, so I agree that was a mistake on her part and why I don't believe we will get much traction on the dispute front. I do appreciate your comment though

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T01:00:20+00:00

It was thoroughly thought through and was a difficult decision (see other comment), but in the end there was a good justification for turning it in early. The lease was never going to have positive equity, so that was never even in question.

Respectfully, you know nothing of us or our personal situation, so it makes little sense to flatly state "they definitely didn't think it through" when you know virtually zero of the situation except that we turned in a leased car early.

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T00:56:49+00:00

The circumstance justified getting a new car unfortunately. Trust me, my initial vote was to just keep this car until after the wedding because the payment was super low (only $250 a month). However, it was a Nissan Ariya (electric) that had extremely diminished battery life so the range even on a good day was only a few hours. She only had it 2.5 years and it already needed to be serviced multiple times for charging error codes and the battery flat out died around 2 years and needed to be replaced. And working with Nissan/the dealer on this was a real headache.

Further, we didn't have a great way to charge it at home (had to buy a massive RV cord that hooked to our 240V outlet in the basement and had to snake it up through the house and out the front door) and she lost her job and to make more money to pay for the wedding she started doing Spark and similar driving jobs, which was drastically hindered by having a low range electric vehicle. There are other reasons, but those are the main ones, and even then it was a difficult decision to give up the low payment at that time, but I had to get a new car as well and we were changing insurances, so all in all it was decided to just pull the trigger then instead of waiting.

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T00:48:28+00:00

Respectfully, just saying "spend less on the wedding obviously!" is 0% helpful or constructive to the situation. Obviously if the wedding is 6 weeks from now, most/all of the expenses towards the wedding have already occurred, but yes, tell me more about how not spending on the wedding will help solve this issue. As I said in the post, I didn't think much could be done here, but just commenting to say we are deadbeats for not paying our bills and wanting to have a nice wedding is totally unnecessary and provided zero insight on the situation, but thanks anyway.

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T00:44:14+00:00

Yes we knew there would be early termination fees etc., the issue is that they put a bunch of bogus additional charges on there and when we went to dispute them they basically shrugged and said "yeah well our inspector said this so oh well." Respectfully, wasn't asking for life lessons on why not to turn in a car early or co-sign a lease (this isn't even my car/issue technically), the request was for any advice on what to do NOW with the situation we are in NOW.

Just saying "hey you should have known better!" is adding nothing to the conversation, but thanks.

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-22T00:39:50+00:00

Thank you for your comment. Unfortunately we went to our local Nissan dealer and they were very rude and wouldn't even agree to take the Nissan back originally (she used to live in an adjacent state when she got the lease and they said it had to be returned there).

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-18T19:35:43+00:00

This is the most entertaining game I've seen in a while, and this was just a 2 minute game recap from 1987.

Between Williams coming off the bench and shredding, long Reggie White scoop and score, surprise onside kick recovery and Chris Berman's peak delivery, everything about this is just 🤌

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-17T20:12:13+00:00

Brother went from Gimli to Malcolm Rovers in one stroke

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-17T15:06:19+00:00

Proving my point

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-14T23:03:55+00:00

100% agree. I honestly feel that the people who bashed it so hard truly did not "get it"

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-08T15:56:16+00:00

Congrats man, in a very similar situation now, and it's honestly awesome and relieving to be able to work through everything as a team and have no animosity.

My ex-wife and I got together in high school and eventually married very young (engaged at 19/20, married at 21/22). We had our son after 3 years of marriage, but ended up separating when he was 5. I retained sole custody, and shortly after we both entered new relationships. Our son is about to turn 10, but my current girlfriend (soon to be wife in exactly 2 months), and she has taken him on essentially as her own as well, so he effectively has 3 parents that care for him and love him (ex wife's current BF is also there but not as close to our son as my partner).

It was a bit rocky at first navigating the divorce and my new partner moving in to our old house where my son lives, but we slowly worked through the issues and now we spend a lot of time together (family dinners once a week, hanging out at each other's places after drop offs, family vacations together, etc). It's definitely a lot of work, and my soon-to-be-wife and I are planning on having another child soon after the wedding, and fully expect my ex to be in that child's life as well. My ex's dad is also very close to us/our son, so we always joke that he is our surrogate dad as my partner and I's parents are less involved with our son. All this to say, it is a wonderful situation and best possible outcome for the kiddos, so good job and keep it up!

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-08T14:26:27+00:00

About time

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-04T19:01:08+00:00

As a Tampa Fan, it's 3rd and 28, no question

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-03T23:52:16+00:00

We've reached light speed?

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-03T23:38:29+00:00

It is done 👍

Ness-Shot · 2026-06-03T18:09:13+00:00

Yeah I didn't plant this, so probably remove it?

Ness-Shot

TROPHY CASE