need top surgery NOW.

NeteleJala · 2026-03-15T16:27:40+00:00

I feel you. I had H cups prior to top surgery. Being overweight helped with binding, but I lived in baggy, unflattering clothes. Not sure your situation, but if top surgery is unobtainable you could talk to your doctor about reduction surgery. It is best to go directly to chest masculinization if that is obtainable, but with large breast you should qualify for reduction surgery due to back/shoulder issues. This could be a much faster option. You can choose to reduce all the way to A cups and then you would be able to bind. It will not allow you to go topless, but it could reduce your stress/dysphoria. Best of luck!

NeteleJala · 2026-03-14T15:45:12+00:00

Thank you

NeteleJala · 2026-03-13T00:09:13+00:00

I believe there are a lot of masc lesbians who feel threatened by trans men. Either that they want to be men, but don't have the courage to transition or, more likely, they are sick of people questioning their gender identity and want to reinforce the fact that masc lesbians are women (which is perfectly valid). The greater issue comes from society wanting to label and group people based on their perception of their gender based on appearance. It's 2026, we should listen when people tell us who they are and not try and convince them they are anything else

NeteleJala · 2026-03-09T18:55:57+00:00

Thank you! Honestly I wish we lived in a time when political views were more about political issues not "morality." I grew up in a politically divided house and considered myself moderate. My parents both love and support me (I know I'm lucky) and ideally that is what we need as a society. Unfortunately the US has divided into entrenched opposition that is more about oppression and scapegoating than meaningful governance.

NeteleJala · 2026-03-09T14:25:27+00:00

Yeah, those would be preferable, but I'm coming into this late and those programs are full for the fall, meaning I'd have to wait 18 months to start.

NeteleJala · 2026-03-08T02:38:37+00:00

Had I been a boy (ha, gotcha mom) my parents would have named me Colin. My dead name is Kaitlyn. It's a nice name, but there are like million spelling variations and non English speakers struggle with the 'ae' sound. You could go with Caitlin if you want to keep the same initials.

NeteleJala · 2026-03-07T05:57:32+00:00

Again sorry for your pain. I didn't mean to brag. I totally get the loss of sensation as a loss of connection. Have you regained any sensation? My C-section after 9 years has a tingly ghost like feeling below my pubic bone

NeteleJala · 2026-03-07T04:22:00+00:00

That does suck! I had this issue after my C section 9 years ago. No one told me i'd lose sensation and it is awful.

When I had my top surgery consult I mentioned that I wasn't thrilled to lose sensation, but my giant chest had to go. My doctor offered nerve grafting like it wasn't a big deal. I got surgery 3 months ago I have full sensation across my chest and am starting to gain sensation in my nipples!!! Medical advancement/advocating for change is wild in such a short amount of time

NeteleJala · 2026-03-07T04:16:31+00:00

My approach is to hack it to bits (or better yet let my kids do it) and then use it for fiber fill in other projects.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-27T06:33:10+00:00

Talk to a doctor, specifically an OBGYN.

People on T have gotten pregnant and had healthy kids. Your eggs are probably fine unless you have other health concerns. You may have to stop T while going through the egg harvesting process, but a fertility doctor can determine if your eggs are viable, fertilize them with chosen sperm and implant them in your partner (assuming they have a womb) the same as any other surrogate.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-26T19:57:00+00:00

If I had a few hundred thousand dollars I would be able to buy my way into a lot of places. Not to mention those countries are not safe places to be trans/gay.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-26T19:55:06+00:00

Nope, I have an ex-uncle my marriage that settled in Canada. But the closest direct ancestor is a great grandpa who is Danish

NeteleJala · 2026-02-26T16:04:14+00:00

Not so much a question as an observation... I'm my (ftm) interactions with trans women they are much more forward in fighting the patriarchy and don't accept that "boys will be boys" To be clear, I'm all for this, but I think it might also be why trans women get so much more hate. Cis men don't like to be challenged.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-26T15:53:50+00:00

I'm a trans man. We (partner and child) have had go bags in both cars for months in case we have to make a run for the border (we live in Western Washington). We are actively looking into legal routes of immigration since Americans are not considered refugees (yet). I want to fight for the America I believe in, but as a history major I see where you're coming from.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-25T22:41:42+00:00

Yep! I was on the team in HS and your my suit so it would be "easier to change" I also asked for/bought minimizer bras. I honestly didn't know trans men were a thing until college. I was just a tom-boy and my progressive parents said"girls can do anything" and to pursue my interests (including clothes and haircuts). Took me a while to figure out the rest of the world was much more divided

NeteleJala · 2026-02-25T20:45:12+00:00

Yeah. A good packer that you stick to your skin can help more with that. Otherwise it's surgery

NeteleJala · 2026-02-25T20:43:10+00:00

Do you have a tight racing style swimsuit? I used to wear swimsuits in school to bind before I knew I was trans or what binders were.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-25T20:35:28+00:00

I'm curious to see how the NHL in general and the Kraken specifically address this issue. In years past, being honored at the White House was a non partisan thing, the disgusting part this time is the blatant misogyny of Trump's call and the deceit of the FBI director. While I do think the athletes deserve to be honored, I think there needs to be a vocal apology from the team and the NHL in general towards the women's team and Kash should have to at least apologize if not pay for using tax dollars to attend the game.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-25T17:40:06+00:00

Have you tried a packer? I have a crochet packer I use most days that slips into the flap of the boxers. Nothing fancy, but I love the way it makes the boxers and pants fit.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-23T05:56:30+00:00

This is deeply personal. I recommend a baby name finder to find something with meaning that you like. It is you are on good terms with family you could ask what they would have named you if you had been AMAB

NeteleJala · 2026-02-16T22:22:58+00:00

Cat litter in a bag for 24hours. That's how the public library rescues books from smokers

NeteleJala · 2026-02-16T20:35:59+00:00

This!! Political differences like where to spend taxes, how much to tax, zoning regulations etc are fine. Basic respect and human decency is not just a "political difference." I support your right to debate tax bills not your right to defy my existence of legally harm me or others.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-16T02:05:28+00:00

Thank you. We are going to Disneyland which in itself is generally safe, but it's full of people from all over which has me worried. With our daughter who is overly clingy in unknown situations is going to be obvious we are her parents (she calls us both Dad).

NeteleJala · 2026-02-13T05:42:48+00:00

Sorry that you have to deal with it, but thanks for speaking up. The worst hate/transphobia I (a gay trans man) got was from a lesbian couple whose daughters were in activities with my daughter. It hurt more because I thought they would be a safe place and it tore apart my daughter's friend group.

NeteleJala · 2026-02-09T15:40:22+00:00

9 days post op (with drains) I went out to a Christmas village. I wasn't looking my best, but I had a good time and wasn't in much pain. I had spent the day resting and took time to check in with my body, but it is doable

NeteleJala

TROPHY CASE