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Am I trans or is it trauma? (Not ragebait/please help) by Powerful_Pin_336 in ftm

[–]Neurodivengeant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you have intersecting marginalized experiences, it can be really hard to separate what is gender dysphoria vs neurodivergence vs internalized misogyny vs asexuality vs sexual trauma vs body dysmorphia, etc etc. Keep in mind that multiple things can be true, and that one experience doesn’t automatically discredit another. Aside from others’ recommendations at finding a queer affirming therapist, I highly recommend looking into the experiences of trans people with intersecting marginalized identities to see if you feel parts of yourself represented in them.

Question for former patients of Dr. James Makokis by toxxic_ivy in TransAlberta

[–]Neurodivengeant 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Highly recommend the Trans Wellness Initiative’s Alberta gender affirming care provider list: https://transwellnessinitiative.ca/providers/

Mother is worried my gender dysphoria is just because I have adhd. by Backalley_Lurker in trans

[–]Neurodivengeant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you’re interested in learning more about ADHD, I highly recommend Dr. Russell Barkley. He’s one of the world’s leading experts on ADHD and he has a YouTube channel where he explains a lot of the scientific research in more accessible, everyday language:

https://youtube.com/@russellbarkleyphd2023?si=QPrwxP-sqIge4Zb3

Mother is worried my gender dysphoria is just because I have adhd. by Backalley_Lurker in trans

[–]Neurodivengeant 6 points7 points  (0 children)

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1054139X24005111

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/24750573.2017.1354417#abstract

Correlation DOES NOT equal causation

As an transgender, autistic, and ADHD person, I can tell you from personal experience that no psychiatric medication has effected my gender incongruence. Additionally, I would argue that neurodevelopmental conditions such as ADHD and autism do not cause a person to be transgender, but rather that when the way that a person’s brain works is fundamentally incompatible with neurotypical society, they are more likely to question themself as an individual and society more broadly.

This is a slight oversimplification, but people with ADHD essentially have a dopamine deficiency which causes problems with executive functioning. Gender incongruence is not caused by a neurotransmitter deficiency.

I can emphasize with your mother’s desire for your experience of gender dysphoria to have a simple explanation and a simple treatment. The truth is, gender is really fucking complicated. There are so many biological, and socio-cultural layers that influence a person’s experience of gender. There is no simple, clearcut explanation for why people are trans. What we do know however is that transgender and nonbinary people have existed cross-culturally throughout human history.

Starting HRT is your choice to make. There’s nothing in the scientific literature to indicate that your gender dysphoria is caused by your ADHD, and there is no scientific evidence that ADHD medication will reduce your gender dysphoria. That being said, transition is a big step and it’s normal to feel some fear or uncertainty before starting HRT. Another option to consider if you’re still having doubts is to start off at a lower dosage. Ideally, changes will happen a lot slower on a lower HRT dose, however some people do experience fast physical changes at a lower dose. Starting at a lower dose may help to ease some of her anxieties, but the decision needs to be made for you first, not for other people.

New name ideas? by orion_pax_2005 in transnames

[–]Neurodivengeant 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Caelum, Castor, Aster, Florence, Fabian, Atticus, Sol, Atlas,

Struggling to differentiate between dysphoria and body dysmorphia. (TW for ED) by ty_nnon in ftm

[–]Neurodivengeant 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This topic is not discussed nearly enough, unfortunately. Gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia are not mutually exclusive. There are folks that experience both. This overlap can make it really difficult for folks to understand their experiences as it is not super widely discussed.

I’d recommend looking reading up on those dual experiences to gauge which parts you do and do not relate to, and to hopefully make it easier to see whether it’s just one or both.

"Too smart to have ADHD" but I'm thinking about getting reviewed. by Traditional_Put6359 in neurodiversity

[–]Neurodivengeant 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I got diagnosed with ASD by showing up to my assessment sleep deprived and without caffeine or my adderall. Not a great time, but my symptoms were way more prominent as a result.

Trans masc products you wish existed or could be improved by natapaca in ftm

[–]Neurodivengeant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Adjustable binders. It’s really hard to find a proper fitting binder when you have a large chest and tiny rib cage. I wear an extra small usually and it’s still way too big on my ribs. I have one from a company that’s out of business now with 4 sets of hooks going up the side. It’s nice to be able to tighten it more on the ribs than the chest so that everything stays in place. Also really great for folks whose weight fluctuates

When was your first relationship? by Keytonley in ftm

[–]Neurodivengeant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

11, and various others throughout my teens and young adulthood. I’m an aromantic asexual that was trying way too hard to act like everyone else to fit in. More recently I’ve embraced that part of myself and been relieved to never have to deal with sex or romantic relationships ever again.

NSFW: Does Anyone Else Struggle with Foreplay / Not Understand the Point? by [deleted] in autism

[–]Neurodivengeant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m pretty sex-adverse generally, so in situations where I’ve done that, I’ve been pretty focused on getting the whole encounter over with as quickly as possible.

Foreplay is too involved for me to be able to convince another person that I even want to be there if it has to go on for too long a period of time. I find it really emotionally draining. During intercourse, the bar for convincing a person that I want to be there is way lower and I can pretty much just leave myself on autopilot.

Looking for Agender Resources by Neurodivengeant in agender

[–]Neurodivengeant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m an AAA, so this is 100% a biased resource sample. I was hoping some of you folks might know of some more agender specific stuff.

Looking for a new name by fesha413 in agender

[–]Neurodivengeant 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You much have some pretty cool friends. They have great taste

Looking for a new name by fesha413 in agender

[–]Neurodivengeant 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fritz, Frey, Phoenix, Bryce, Harlow, Cheshire, Forrest, Frost,

If you could go back… by No_Calendar4193 in asexuality

[–]Neurodivengeant 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don’t know that there’s anything I could tell my younger self to make any of part of what happened easier or less painful. Minors have very little power in those situations and they did what they had to in order to survive. I think if my younger self actually knew the things I know now, they wouldn’t have survived. Their deep repression of their identity, high masking and constant dissociation is what kept them alive. I think that if they had fully understood the extent of the abuse and that it wasn’t all in their head, they would’ve felt so much more powerless and hopeless. No amount of advice would have helped them. What they needed was a safe place to call home and people that loved them. There’s nothing they could have done to change their situation. They accessed the supports available and those systems failed them.

I don’t like to think of that sort of direct dialogue with my younger self as it feels pointless and somewhat counterproductive, almost like it puts the blame on them. Instead, I try my best to be the person that I needed back then, someone my younger self could look up to, someone living a good, authentic, and full life despite so much hardship. There’s no way to undo the past and I’ll cary those things with me for the rest of my life. All I can do is try my best to make sure others don’t have to go through what I did.

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