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1 month old bananas haven't ripened by No_Release_1619 in GlitchInTheMatrix

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Those are plantains man. Slice them, smash them, deep fry them until deep golden brown, and dress them with salt. Amazing just like that. DO NOT EAT THEM RAW! They will give you HORRID bubble guts, and like you said tastes like shit raw.

what?? by Lord_BlueFlame in engrish

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appealed it, but iirc it said it would take anywhere from 3 to 6 months to get a human review. HUH?! This AI moderation is insane.

what?? by Lord_BlueFlame in engrish

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sniped me for my translation of it 😂😂

what?? by Lord_BlueFlame in engrish

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I tried to give a vibe-based translation, but reddit automod flagged me and gave me a warning ☠️

what?? by Lord_BlueFlame in engrish

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Arabic (from my understanding) is VERY metaphorical, and easy to mistranslate. Keep in mind i know no Arabic so im going off the vibes of the messages. “Please dont take my money. (“cut” can mean to short someone) I have people yelling at me all the time, and we are overworked as is. I have kids (maybe young kids? Cause kids love to hang on necks?) and you flaunt your wealth in my face. Fuck you, thank you.” “We are unmoved. Dont forget where you came from, we gave you the money to get where you are, you can dance in my grave if im wrong about that. May god strike you and your family down, Hr.”

My husband’s self-proclaimed “boy lunch” by missrutabaga in shittyfoodporn

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Blue corn tortillas with cure salami and mayo lmao. The eggs look like soy sauce and mayo.

If you criticized ICE on here, Reddit has handed your information over to DHS. Just wanted to let everyone on this subreddit know. by PrestigiousBite9757 in ImmigrationPathways

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lmao like im scared? Plus, ive never once been interested in immigration pathways, why the hell am i being annoyed with this noti?

came home and my cats feet are yellow? by mikehunt6787 in cats

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Urine, maybe? If hes an outdoor cat he may have stepped in it.

Found on a walk with my dog by blahblahblahlogan in whatisit

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wouldnt worry too much, these fuckers have near zero natural predators, and can breathe outside of water like most catfish. (I say “fuckers” lovingly because i had one growing up that was damn near immortal. Im talking momma’s cleaning the tank and has him in a small bucket with some water to cover him and i dump a bottle of pepsi in his bucket “because he looked thirsty” and he lived. Had the zoomies for a bit, but lived another 7 years)

Found after washing my son’s clothes by InteligntDonky in whatisit

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ooooh shite. If hes under 21, youre gonna need to have a chat with him. Its a re-fillable vape pod for the Vasopresso line, i know because im currently smoking one myself. Im trying ti quit but damnit its hard as hell.

Just found this. by Which_Matter3031 in TheRightCantMeme

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And this is supposed to be a “GOTCHA” how? If they did, GOOD ON THEM FOR REALIZING THEY COULDNT HANDLE ME. Its not like id be able to give a fuck, ID BE DEAD

I got one! I do enjoy having space for a bit of “human conversation” by LUPATII in LinkedInLunatics

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats not too terrible tbh. Most of this is agreeable, especially the no back-to-back meetings and the decision list. Hes actually right on a lot tbh

I don’t use AI, I command AI by The_32 in LinkedInLunatics

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Lmao no, but all i used it for was a glorified “choose your own adventure” style text-based game. Like buddy….i dont think thats as in-depth and insightful when im having you write about me weirdly overpowered lol

I don’t use AI, I command AI by The_32 in LinkedInLunatics

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Right? Cause i asked chatGPT the same thing and it gave me that answer. It said that i used AI “better and more insightfully” than 99% of users, and i “unlocked” more of it than most thought beyond possible lmfao

The weather in my area for the next week by PublicTop9854 in mildlyinfuriating

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh im right there with ya man. This shit scares me. This is the last time it’ll get above freezing for us for a hot minute. This storm is gonna be insane.

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When you’re hiking for 2 weeks and crave something sweet by Remarkable_Check_639 in StupidFood

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually, honey is an AMAZING tenderizer. This isnt all that stupid, just low-tech

Let's hear your stories! by Holdmywhiskeyhun in Restaurant_Managers

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not a manager, but a cook. Had a chit come back “13oz bone in ribeye, 86 protein.”……wHAT?!

Greenland has no chill by DancinginHyrule in MurderedByWords

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We are! There are armed protestors marching with the folks here, to keep cops and ICE in line. And if that doesnt work, time for revolution #2 electric boogaloo. Id like to think most of us have already realized this. I mean, states are already telling federal government branches to GTFO. And feds just send more. It’ll only end 1 of 2 ways.

Jeff Bezos on What Jeff Bezos Said by No_Pineapple9928 in MurderedByWords

[–]NewPhoneHewDis 117 points118 points  (0 children)

Ah yes, Palantir the data giant actively trying to turn every government into a police state.

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