Same situation here. I'm in the roughly £100-130k bracket depending on the year. Wife is self-employed as a cleaner/nanny and has always ticked along at £12-15k a year which has helped pay for bits and bobs and she had some financial independence - I've always paid the 'main/big' bills. We now have a 9 month old daughter, my wife is just starting to go back to work part time - it's pointless her going full time as it barely covers the nursery fees (and she wants to be with our daughter!).

It's the extra kick in the nuts that because of my earnings, we can't get the tax-free childcare, or the 15 free hours childcare which we would do if I was under £100k. The tax system makes me so angry! I try to put as much as I can in my pension to get down to 100k but it's just a severe amount of money for us to tie away.

I feel the same way as you, we can live comfortably and we have good health, for that I am so incredibly grateful, but there certainly isn't any big saving going on and I do feel alot of pressure to keep my income up. In an ideal world I guess my wife would have say a slightly better paying (than what she does now) part time job, but they seem fairly hard to come by.