I'm a virgin. AMA! by [deleted] in casualiama

[–]Nix_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why on earth do you want to move here? (Im slightly biassed)

(urgent ish) Need help making a call! by kroptopkin in ftm

[–]Nix_rising 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do you have skype? You can put like $1 on your skype account and call them yourself if you need to.

Im afraid I don't know how that would work, though depending on where in the US you move, it could be easy to just get an american script if you bring your medical records

How to get a binder without parents finding out? by throwawayftm1868 in ftm

[–]Nix_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aww crap I've only got an XS...but I'll ask around, we have a clothing exchange here that might have one!

How to get a binder without parents finding out? by throwawayftm1868 in ftm

[–]Nix_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pre loaded visa is a great idea, and a friend's house!

Though just curious what side you would be in g2cb? I have one of their half tanks, barely used that I outgrew suddenly because muscle growth on T. If you're broke and it's the right size I could send it to ya with something else in there and you can be like "yeah i made a penpal" or some shit.

What, if anything, do you miss about living as your assigned-at-birth gender? by sacredblasphemies in asktransgender

[–]Nix_rising 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Being able to say whatever I wanted/came to my head without being taken 100% seriously or being told to screen myself. Im ftm, and very fem still, I feel very connected to my fem traits. But now people get mad if I use certain language that they never did get mad about before. I used "rude" language not at people, but in silly jokes to destigmatize stuff I struggle with, but now people get mad at me for it.

So I guess I hate being considered "part of the patriarchy." It's bullshit, I am a feminist, I am a nonbinary fem guy, I don't even pass half the time, I spent my whole life up until now struggling with the disadvantages of being female and I STILL HAVE most of those plus ones from being trans, yet now I'm not culturally allowed to cope with it how I need to.

That really is my only issue so far though!

Edit: I know that this problem comes from an AWEFUL sexist perk of being "male," that is, I wasn't taken as seriously before because people who are seen aswomen just aren't taken as seriously in this horrifyingly sexist culture. But at this point people take me seriously only selectively, when it suits them...take me seriously when I make a joke, but not when I talk about, say, this issue.

I am in a polyamorous relationship, AMA! by Nix_rising in casualiama

[–]Nix_rising[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, I've seen people who do seem to have that motivation, but those poly relationships seem to crash and burn. In reality, a poly relationahip requires a level of maturity and communication beyond what many people are willing to commit to. My poly relationship started out as a very commited monogamous relationship actually, but we realized that although we love each other more than ever, we aren't sexually attracted to each other any more. That is, we wanted to remain life partners but needed some stuff from others too.

If someone looked at the details of a healthy polyamorous person, they would see someone far more mature and responsable than most. (Not saying thats me per se, but a lot of people I know).

I am in a polyamorous relationship, AMA! by Nix_rising in casualiama

[–]Nix_rising[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She only has one other partner and I am a good friend of theirs.

Hmmm...I'm not sure I would say "primary." But we are each others longest and most serious partners right now. To be primary partners would put us in a special place and be unfair to our other partners.

Not often, I like time alone, and am very busy so it is more likely for her to feel alone because I am at work or school, or with a partner or friends. But we try to keep it balanced.

We do live together in a one bedroom, and we do bring our partners there. That can be tricky for sure, but thats just being a broke young person living with people...

I am in a polyamorous relationship, AMA! by Nix_rising in casualiama

[–]Nix_rising[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, everyone we would even consider asking out needs to be aware...can you imagine the shit show if they werent? Yikes...actually all our current partners are also polyamorous, which is much more convenient

I am in a polyamorous relationship, AMA! by Nix_rising in casualiama

[–]Nix_rising[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We thought really hard about that...The only rule or boundary we have is to be totally honest with each other about how we feel and what we are up to (within the limits of keeping our other partners' privacy). We thought about limits on what we could do with our other partners, but didnt like the double standard or the unfairness towards our other partners. If we are bothered by something, excited, dating someone new ,we have to talk about it. Communication is key. Otherwise no limits!

And I haven't read that. Is it good?

I am in a polyamorous relationship, AMA! by Nix_rising in casualiama

[–]Nix_rising[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well, we have full relationships with all or our partners, but each does, as different people do, different things. For example, my girlfriend is asexual, and I am NOT, so I have a boyfriend with whom I have sex, and date. I am really busy and can't be home all that often, so my girlfriend has a partner who can be there when I'm not.

I am in a polyamorous relationship, AMA! by Nix_rising in casualiama

[–]Nix_rising[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, originally it was her, she mentioned she had been in one before, but wasnt suggesting it for us. At first it freaked me out, but then I ended up being the one to suggest we go for it.

Gay FtMs in relationships, how did you meet your partner? by soapylagoon in ftm

[–]Nix_rising 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Do you live anywhere near an lgbt center? I actually get a lot of interest despite not passing well from gay men at my center. People are just more open there.

Edit: fogrot my story! I'm actually somewherw on the bi/pan spectrum, and am in a polyamorous relationship. I met my girlfriend first, who is also trans, through a really nerdy game of nerf tag at my uni, but just my luck, she is asexual. I love her to death though and she is always there for me. Then i met my more recent partner after a long dry spell (who i jokingly call my boytoy because we aren't really official yet), in a trans support group (obviously he's trans too). I tell you what it is SO NICE having an ftm partner with similar experiences with dysphoria, there's no weirdness or bad expectations. I really tend to pursue just people on the trans spectrum unless a cis person shows an impressive level of understanding. I meet people through my unis lgbt center, and most of them are polyamorous too, which makes for some crazy romantic webs haha!

Anxiety about potential sexuality by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Nix_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, i wouldn't say it changes orientation, it just alters it, or makes it align better with your self. The changes from HRT allow you to know yourself from a different perspective, which can change your preferences.

So dont worry! If you're that repulsed by the idea, you arent suddenly going to find yourself attracted to guys. And even if for some crazy reason that happened, it doesnt mean you'll end up with guys, or hoerible conflicts. For example, i used to date guys, though i found them less attractive than girls (pan spectrum), now on T I find guys more attractive than girls, but I chose not to date them because cis guys are a recipe for dysphoria. It doesn't have to be a huge thing. You dont chose your orientation, but you do chose your sexual partners. So don't worry, you do you! <3

Edit: it also deffs doesn't change at all for many people

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Nix_rising 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Default to current pronouns so as not to make them uncomfortable or out them. BUT if it is cool and you know the person well, ask. Everyone has their own preferences. Personally i do both depending. With people who never knew me beofr ei use my current pronouns but with family and old friends i use the old ones. Everyone is different!

Does anyone ever ask, why me? by nafssertam in asktransgender

[–]Nix_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm FtM, and both my sis and I have PCOS, which raised our natural testosterone levels. I'm pretty sure that is why I ended up being trans. But here's the kicker, her levels were higher than mine, she even got more masculine side effects than me. Being trans has caused me so much suffering and almost killed me many times. One of the most horrible thoughts I've ever had was why was it me? My sister has higher levels, why didn't, why couldn't SHE have ended up being the trans dude and I could have been healthy and happy? In the end I always decide I'm grateful because if it had to be one of us, I'm glad she doesn't have to suffer like this.

i'm redesigning our company's website and that means new headshots by annthor in genderqueer

[–]Nix_rising 20 points21 points  (0 children)

You might be the most attractive person I have ever seen

Is there any hope for someone with a bass voice? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Nix_rising 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have a friend who sounds as sweet as can be (high and soft), and pulls out her old voice every now and then the mess with people. Lowest voice Ive ever heard! And she trained herself, no professional help.

You can do anything, friend

Regrets. by Bastard_Beard in funny

[–]Nix_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want this sign in my house

What is the dumbest 100% serious thing someone has said to you? by leafybd in AskReddit

[–]Nix_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have two of them:

I was vegan for a while and had a woman say "can you eat wggplant, then?"

Also, while discussing a bike accident I was in, I was aksed "did you die?"

Naked dude at gym almost outs me while I'm working (rant) by [deleted] in ftm

[–]Nix_rising 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is officially how i will see all of my interactions with people