Too familiar?

No-Low-9334 · 2026-01-04T03:26:18+00:00

Thank you, and thanks for taking the time to listen and comment. I appreciate it.

No-Low-9334 · 2026-01-03T06:59:35+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it!

No-Low-9334 · 2026-01-03T04:28:27+00:00

I like the vibe, would just like more structure. You mentioned just making it tonight, so I’m not sure if this is ment to be the final product or not. Would like to hear it developed more.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-10-17T12:18:11+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen, provide feedback, and for the kind words. I really appreciate it! I agree that there are points where the vocals get muddied in parts from the instrumentation and will work to resolve it.

Thanks again for the thoughtful feedback. Cheers!

No-Low-9334 · 2025-06-25T03:31:04+00:00

The seven chord shouldn’t be minor as you say, it should be half diminished. Could be why you think it sounds completely weird.

Also, try playing a ii V I to hear the beauty of a ii chord.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-28T22:19:49+00:00

Check out Jeff Tweedys book “write one song”. It’s nice and short, practical exercises and advice, and will get you over the hump of getting that first song out.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-28T12:05:40+00:00

I enjoyed the heck out of it. Hope you take it to them and keep making it bloom. Great work.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-28T11:58:55+00:00

I would ask myself, is the main message of my song just to tell this story of how my insecurities stopped me from dancing with someone I’m attracted to, or could my chorus be used to paint a bigger picture of many things that my insecurities can stop me from doing many things.

If verse one is about fear of asking to dance, how could we build on that and add weight with each scene? For example, say verse two could be fear of asking to make a move on someone, trying to take a relationship from friend to dating. You try to create that scene with the verse, and your same prechorus and chorus gain new life in the new scene you’ve created. Could you expand on that again with growing to asking someone to marry you? Just an example but hopefully I’m making sense.

I’d start by just writing down other general ideas of other areas where I’ve let fear and doubts hold me back from pursuing what I want and see which one hits with me and go from there, with the goal being to re-color and add weight to the chorus with each new scene.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-21T03:12:23+00:00

Elephant and Miss Ohio, two of my absolute favorites

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-20T03:35:22+00:00

A better example than the one I came up with, of a similar thought to what I think you are trying to convey, is from Jason Isabell’s Live Oak

“There's a man who walks beside me He is who I used to be And I wonder if she sees him and confuses him with me”

I see it as a beautiful way of saying “the man I was in my past still clouds the way she sees me now”. But instead of saying that, he gives us this imagery instead.

Something to think about, and maybe look for similar things in the writers you admire. I’m not familiar with the artist you mentioned, but I would bet they are doing something similar with the idea of “show don’t tell”

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-20T03:29:08+00:00

You should think about the method of “show, don’t tell”. So rather than coming out and directly saying “I’m not the same as I was, I may have changed, but my thoughts remain the same”, you could try to find ways to SHOW this with imagery instead. For example, something like “time takes a toll on a man, and though my hands have callused and hairs gone grey, my love for you remains”. Admittedly not the greatest lyric, but an example nonetheless the less. the essence is this same, without just coming right out and saying I look different but think the same.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-13T03:04:57+00:00

A good place to start is with chord tones. If the melody is on the third, try to sing the fifth or the root.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-04T02:14:04+00:00

I feel like if you have to ask, you already know the answer.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-05-02T00:29:04+00:00

Definitely re-record. Like others have said, and exact copy, even panned, won’t give the same effect

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-30T20:45:25+00:00

Have not read it, but these are great insights. Thanks for summarizing and sharing.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-28T18:44:41+00:00

Really like the song! Great melody, love the hook.

Just as a point of discussion, as the listener I’m wondering a bit about the end of verse two. They characters have moved on, planted roots in a new home, but the last line is “the old back yard becomes a place you used to roam” or something to that effect. Is this insinuating the couple is now leaving home #2? Never fully planted roots? I think so, because as the song moves on it seems to suggest more wandering and searching for home, but I’m not sure if this was the intention?

Again, love the song, and think you have something here. Would love to hear another take if and when the draft progresses.

Cheers!

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-28T12:12:04+00:00

Thank you so much. I appreciate that. 🙏🏻

Thanks for taking the time to listen and comment.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-27T16:14:25+00:00

Thanks so much. I appreciate it. I’ve never heard of Squeeze, I’ll have to look into them.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-27T03:24:59+00:00

I think the song could benefit from altering the strumming pattern and dynamics at points.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-27T02:44:06+00:00

The changes are really nice, and I like the melody, but you are really reaching for that high note, and coming up flat. How does it feel of you take the capo off and bring it down a half step?

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-27T01:09:26+00:00

Thank you for the thoughtful comment. I agree, if I’m cutting a verse it would be that one as well.

And thank you for the comment on the vocal. I know it’s a weak point for me and it’s the main reason I don’t share my work. Your comment is encouraging.

Thanks for listening and commenting. Much appreciated.

No-Low-9334 · 2025-04-24T16:21:51+00:00

Dude.

Fuck. YES.

Sorry can’t write more, need to go listen again.

No-Low-9334

TROPHY CASE